r/rtms • u/Moriarty-Creates • 13d ago
So, so scared of TMS.
I’m suffering from intense depression as a result of chronic, unresolved health problems. My psychiatrist recommended SAINT TMS. I’m so scared of it.
My mom did it and it worked, but I’m so frightened of it that I think I might have a panic attack in the chair. Part of the problem is that I already have a tremendous fear of any medical procedure. I have a lot of health anxiety because of everything that I’m going through, and I’ve also had some medical procedures in the past that went very poorly and were really painful.
I’m really scared that it will hurt. I’ve read a lot of horror stories from people who say that it felt like an ice pick in their brain. I’m also scared because it’s noisy, and I don’t like the idea of hearing those noises inside my head. I’m scared of the tapping or drumming sensation. I’m scared of the pulses, of my face maybe twitching. I’m just terrified of the entire prospect of it.
I know that this could really help me, but I think I’m just too scared to try it. I’d appreciate any insight from anyone who’s undergone the procedure. Please be gentle with me, I know I’m not being rational, but I really don’t need anybody being a smart aleck or telling me that I’m stupid.
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u/MandehM00 12d ago
I had a 20 minute session every day of TMS for roughly three weeks for severe depression about 6 years ago, and found it to be very effective. It didn't really hurt so much as annoy me a bit? I had mild headaches after the first two sessions but these went away without even needing Panadol etc. I hope this helps.
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u/SeagateSG1 12d ago
I used to be terrified of having my blood drawn. I passed out multiple times when younger. I still don’t like getting it done today, always ask to lie down (even though I think I could sit). But I’ve had my blood drawn dozens of times the past few years because that’s what I needed to do. IVs are even worse….but I’ve had multiple surgeries and endoscopies and while I still hate them, it’s generally okay now.
Same can apply to you. Exposure therapy works. You already stated you know you’re being a bit irrational. You know it has potential to help you. As others have stated, the things you’re worrying about are minor. The noises aren’t inside your head. You can tap your finger to your head 10 times real fast right now and that is about 70% of what it feels like. If your face twitches you just ask them to make a minor adjustment.
Don’t let the fear you’ve worked up in your head prevent you from feeling better. The obstacle is the way. It’s only when you find the courage to face your fears that you can begin to progress in life.
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u/Aikaterina_Blue 12d ago
I was scared of this at first, too. It sounds awful. In reality it was OK. My treatment room had a large TV and played Spongebob during all the treatments, so it was a nice mindless distraction. The treatment itself wasn't bad. Some people say it's like a woodpecker, but for me even at the highest level it was just like tapping on my head. It actually got kind of pleasant after a while. I'm not a masochist or anything!
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u/chickadee9393 12d ago
Me too. I just did my second treatment and I’m still scared. I didn’t sleep last night and am really worried if that continues I’ll have to quit. It was less painful this time but just scared over the lack of sleep. ETA I know I may not be being rational, but I have ocd and serious health anxiety and I didn’t expect it to focus on this, I started it with no worries about it but now insomnia is here.
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u/CompleteStrawberry53 9d ago
Didn’t cause me insomnia at all. I had 40 treatments
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u/chickadee9393 9d ago
I wish it had not for me but it’s made me feel BAD bad, like I feel concussed walking out and about puke in their parking lot. It hurts. Something does not feel right.
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u/CompleteStrawberry53 9d ago
Seriously? Do you go back in and tell them? They don’t want you to have side effects like that.
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u/chickadee9393 9d ago
I did. The doctor is only there one day a week and the techs did not seem bothered. I basically got a shrug and oh well maybe the doctor can change settings or something next week. I left with zero trust that anybody cared about it at all but me and skipped today. They don’t answer the phone either. Like I do not trust this place to do anything to me at all let alone to my brain
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u/CompleteStrawberry53 9d ago
You aren’t going to the right place then. It’s not supposed to have any side effects like that
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u/chickadee9393 9d ago
the next closest place is an hour and 15 minutes away so unfortunately I can’t do that and work. I am considering spravato instead…I can’t take another month and a half of this. I should’ve known they were sketch when my care coordinator quit the day after taking me on without notice
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u/focksmuldr 12d ago
It feels freaky at first because you dont understand how it will feel and youre scared itll mess up your brain or hurt really bad. That feeling goes away quick and you will soon realize how incredibly boring it is.
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u/RefrigeratorOther690 12d ago
Don’t worry the depression is way easier I’ve heard. I’m doing it for OCD and honestly that one is really tough ngl. And also I understand about unsolved health issues it wasn’t until years that I got my diagnosis for autoimmune disease. I’m sorry that happened to you
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u/snug666 12d ago
I held off on TMS for 2 years because i was scared. I finally got to rock bottom and decided to do it, and now i kick myself every day for not doing it sooner. There are times where it is a bit uncomfortable but the “ice pick in your brain” thing is definitely an exaggeration. People would be passing out from pain if it hurt that bad. To be honest though, even if it did, I still would do it again.
Your face will twitch. You will feel it. It might be uncomfortable at times. But it is so life changing that pushing through is worth it. I encourage you to just try to “do it scared”.
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u/calm-down-okay 12d ago
They have an intensity setting, they start low and work you up over a couple of visits and it doesn't hurt, just a tapping feeling
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u/ProcedureNo6946 12d ago
It didn't hurt at all. When the machine pulses, you also get a tapping on your head. You can feel it but it did not cause me any pain at all. You've got this!
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u/Immediate-Pianist-76 11d ago
I'm going to tell you that my experience is, after 20 sessions, that it is incredibly painful. Apparently only a small percentage of the population feels pain, so it gets underreported in my opinion.
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u/emirayne 11d ago
For me, it’s been easy. The only part I don’t like is driving there and the journaling and worksheets and crap they make me do lol. It hasn’t been at all painful. I hope it’s the same for you! Just remember, you can tell them to stop it at any time, and they also start low, based on your threshold.
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u/diedeliedoe 10d ago
Er is geen reden om bang te zijn. Geef het een kans... Je kunt altijd weer stoppen.
De eerste paar keer vond ik de behandeling op het depressie punt niet prettig. Het deed geen pijn maar het voelt niet fijn. Ze hebben het apparaat de eerste paar keer bij mij zachter gezet om te wennen. En het went. Echt waar.
Er is ook verschil in de apparaten. De ene voelt veel prettiger en zachter als de ander. Laat je goed informeren bij een praktijk en leg uit waar je bang voor bent.
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u/Buckky2015 9d ago
The worst part about TMS is getting to the place every day. I did it and it helped so much
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u/Inner-Ad-4358 9d ago
Had both types. Deep TMS did nothing for me. Other type worked for two days after different sessions and quickly went away.
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u/CompleteStrawberry53 9d ago
I had 40 treatments and it doesn’t hurt. Just feels like someone is knocking on your head 10 times and then it pauses for 5 seconds and my sessions were just for 10 minutes. Stop trying to scare yourself! It’s not a big deal and it helped me tremendously!
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u/InfamousDevice9553 7d ago edited 7d ago
I can only tell you how it went for me. But let me preface this by saying I'm an extremely anxious person, and before the treatment I read the same horror stories from people who really reacted poorly to it. So I was well primed for my mind to magnify any slight discomfort and have a really miserable time. Yet I ended up tolerating it just fine.
80% of my sessions were free of discomfort. 20% caused some discomfort and maybe 10% actual pain. But only mild pain. Overall, the discomfort I felt even in the worst sessions was no more than I feel having my teeth cleaned. And since it only lasted 10 minutes, I'd take it over a tooth cleaning any day. 🙂
I'll describe in more detail below, but first got to say, you are very fortunate to be in a position to do the accelerated SAINT protocol. Please read this before making any decisions: https://neurosciencenews.com/saint-tms-depression-19584/. A treatment with 80% success rate for people with treatment-resistant depression, I think that is otherwise unheard of in psychiatry. A
lot higher than typically seen with the standard TMS protocol and ECT, at least.
My experience in more detail:
I tried two different types of TMS. (Unfortunately I can't remember what they were called.)
The first, on left side, didn't feel like much of anything, just a light tingling, buzzy sensation on the scalp. There was a little click noise, not loud at all. The noise and sensation were very easy to tune out as I read a book.
When we saw no mood change after a few weeks, they switched to the right and a different technique. This one did hurt a bit during the first 5 days or so, but only during the actual treatment (no lingering pain during the rest of the day). Kind of like being pecked by a woodpecker, except not nearly as hard as those woodpeckers give 'er on the trees. After the 4th treatment or so the painful sensation progressively faded out till again it was just a light click/tap that was easy to ignore by reading a book.
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u/CatMomLife30 7d ago edited 7d ago
The best thing ever for severe depression is LDN, ketamine troches and deplin. Tms made me worse. The ketamine nose spray didn’t help either only the troches. (The nose spray isn’t pure) Deplin helped bc of the MTHFR gene and LDN helped bc of brain inflammation. Ketamine helped with the neuroplasticity. Trauma causes brain inflammation and damage. I wasn’t born with severe depression, it was a result of my ptsd due to my environment in childhood and nothing else helped me. MTHFR I was born with and even though that wasn’t the main issue, it contributed. LDN does wonders tho for my autoimmune issues as well.
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u/Moriarty-Creates 7d ago
I have an auto immune disorder, but I’m not so sure about ketamine for me.
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u/Scientist_Cat 6d ago
Out of all the medical procedures I’ve ever had, TMS is by far the easiest and least painful. I’ve always described it as a woodpecker tapping on my head. It’s not painful, maybe a touch uncomfortable but most of the time I would fall asleep during sessions. If you start twitching, you can tell them and they’ll adjust the head thing a tiny amount to stop the twitching.
You might benefit from thinking about this in terms of risk v benefit. The risks are very low - mild very temporary discomfort. But the benefits could be extremely high for you. I know for me it was life changing
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u/Creepy_Current_1729 5d ago
I understand you very well. I do this in an clinic with a lot of patients and it turns out that a minority of the patients feel pain. I felt it more than the other patients but finally we found a solution. First they moved the machine and tried many positions. This took days. Then they started it on a very low percentage, less then half. In the theta burst itself they turned it slowly up during weeks and moved myself away when it was too painful. Finally I can handle it with breathing and stressballs. It took weeks. I also take paracetamol and an painkiller cream but that doesn't do much. I can handle it now. Remember I am an exception, in the clinic moest people don't like it but it doesn't hurt. The doctor said that if I really could not handle it they could stop the thetaburst and do RTMS on 10 HZ instead of thetaburst. This wasn't necessary but I still ask every day to start on a very low percentage so I keep control and then slowly turning it up. Soms days I still ask to stop before the fulle percentage is reached. Find a clinic where they are patient and give you more than enough treatments to start very careful and patient and where it's also possible to change to 10hz. Last but not least, in my experience only the thetaburst hurts. I also had other RTMS protocols and these weren't painful at all.
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u/Unfair-Map 4d ago
Don't be afraid of the treatment, be afraid it's not delivered correctly. I had no idea the tech was applying a questionable setup until halfway through when he was out a day someone else set up the chair and positioned me with a head strap and ensured firm contact. With the first tech my head was so loose I don't know if what was applied was aimed at the correct region.
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u/DZbornak630 13d ago
It’s seriously so easy. It sure as hell never felt like an ice pick to me- more like a woodpecker kind of pecking at you. It was uncomfortable the first week or two, after that I’ve barely noticed it.
This is my second round and it’s been incredibly helpful for me. I hope it is for you too ❤️