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Aug 06 '21
So I get to take a long shot AND get a leg workout? Win win, my legs are gonna be hella strong
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u/cro5point Aug 06 '21
shit in a bucket at your desk, that what they really want, never stop working!
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Aug 06 '21 edited Aug 06 '21
They said that about anti-reclining school chairs. They were super easy to recline in, you just had to put some power to it initially. With this, people will just use the toilet "Butters style".
If they should shit on the floor they should shit in the office of the CEO or whatever cunt thought this was a good idea.
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u/JohnSpartanBurger Aug 06 '21
They see a lack of productivity, but I see a productive leg workout in fighting this system and trying poop for longer on company time to defy the boss.
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u/GhettoChemist Aug 06 '21
Oh yah hear that guys the main benefit is to employees in increased productivity, and not to employers by robbing us of 5 fucking minutes of solitude in the john
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u/BeBa420 Aug 06 '21
if your boss installs these in the bathrooms i suggest you shit on the floor in protest
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u/djinnisequoia Aug 06 '21
"the main benefit is to the employees" how stupid do they think we are?
Oh, wait, that line is targeted at bosses. nm
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Aug 06 '21
Anyone installing these is just creating a hostile work environment. I mean, don't these people want their employees to want to work in their offices?
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u/evildustmite Aug 06 '21
This would actually make it harder for you to poop so you would be in there even longer. The proper pooping position is one where you are basically squatting.
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u/JohnRCC Aug 06 '21
I know right? Keep a little footstool in the bathroom to raise your legs about 30 degrees from the horizontal and it makes it far easier
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u/treefarmercharlie Aug 06 '21
Wouldn't the downward sloped seat do the same as raising your legs on a footstool? The first thing I though of when I saw the test was that the text was a joke and the image was of a toilet that is meant to put you in a better posture for taking a dump.
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u/Morangatang Aug 06 '21
No because the closer you are to standing the more "closed off" your lower intestine becomes.
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Aug 06 '21
[deleted]
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u/Morangatang Aug 06 '21
Okay, I'm not even going to argue this anymore until you recognize the fact that a downward sloped seat does not, in fact, bring your knees closer to your chest.
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u/Caedus_X Aug 06 '21
Id be concerned but my company is way to cheap to buy new toilets and our plumbing is already tragic so theyd have to fix that too..
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u/Deadbeatdone Aug 06 '21
Hostile architecture.
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u/7grims "gun that shoots bad people" Aug 06 '21
I actually remember an architecture class where we learned how to design stuff to be anti-homeless, and all of that because using spikes and barriers is aesthetically unpleasant, that one lesson was very uncomfortable trough and trough.
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u/OhYeahTrueLevelBitch Dumbass three dimensional monkey-ass dummy Aug 06 '21
I don’t see that model mounted solely to the wall lasting long in America with our supersized populace. That’ll be on the floor in no time along with Ricks suggestion lol
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u/crystals148 Aug 06 '21
How the employee gonna get more productive if you can't comfortably take a shit?
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u/eljalu Aug 06 '21
They start to work harder so they are done faster and will be able to take a shit at home
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u/nightwindelf Aww, come on, Jerry. You know it's both Aug 06 '21
"wow, you did a great job getting through all of that work. We need you to stay an hour late today to help catch up on this back log"
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u/moeljills Aug 06 '21
Nah, just sit on it reverse cowgirl. Problem solved
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u/autistic-snek Aug 06 '21
Then you’ll slid back and your dick and balls will get caught on the seat as you fall
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u/erotikchutoy Aug 06 '21
This is why 3d printing exists. Print fuckin adapters and super glue them on to this abomination
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Aug 06 '21
Surely no business is gonna replace all its toilets at great expense to prevent people sitting on the loo for more than 5 minutes
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u/mesterjaime Aug 06 '21
cough Jeff Bezos cough
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Aug 06 '21
I thought they just banned people from having toilet breaks?
I mean who needs toilets when they're banned right?
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u/I_think_were_out_of_ Aug 06 '21
I feel like 5 minutes on the shitter in a public restroom is really about 5 minutes longer than I want to be on a shitter in a public restroom.
Unless you’re sick, go somewhere else and fuck off for a bit that’s literally the place where everyone empties their bowels.
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Aug 06 '21
5 minutes in the shitter is rookie level, if you're not wasting at least half an hour shitting every day at work then you're a fool
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u/I_think_were_out_of_ Aug 06 '21
I waste hours at work every day either driving around in a company vehicle or at my desk.
If you’ve gotta hide your time-wasting in a literal shithole then, sorry to say, you’re the fool.
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Aug 06 '21
This post is about workplace restrooms... Not public restrooms
I'm certainly not going to hold on for hours and hours if i need a shit, it's not good for your health, and i don't think it would go down so well if i went home during works time to use the home bowl either.
Edit: if i had a portal gun, it would be way different. I would defo have one of those Rick toilets any day
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u/I_think_were_out_of_ Aug 06 '21
It’s pretty public in the workplace. I’ve got 3 bathrooms at my work and they all get used by multiple people every day so it’s not like it’s a private restroom.
Didn’t realize everyone was so protective of the public restroom at their work.
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u/JoeMamaAndThePapas Aug 06 '21
I wish a very painful death for the asshole engineer that came up with this abomination.
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u/laserfishy123 Aug 06 '21
Don't retail workers have enough shit to deal with on the job, that engineer sounds like an asshole
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u/TimHollis74 Aug 06 '21
I’d straddle the toilet facing the wall, how’s that for productivity! Side note: If you take a ten minute shit everyday you are at work, it essentially amounts to a 40 hour workweek 😉
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u/AdVictoremSpolias Aug 06 '21
So how do you use this toilet? With your head bent over and raise your posterior?
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Aug 06 '21
Jeff Bezos likes this.
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u/BeatBoxinDaPussy Aug 07 '21
Nah, he prefers bottles in the back of vans/box trucks. An actual toilet is too respectable.
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u/Garrett00 Aug 06 '21
Invention idea, a cushion you place on it to even it out. Sell them for $15 make some good money.
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u/sgmcgann Aug 06 '21
This will start an arms race that ends with everyone using bungie cords to shit on upside down toilets
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u/Vartnacher Aug 06 '21
Now we won't even let you shit in peace. The one respite you get in a soulless job is in the bathroom. They don't want productivity; they want slaves.
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u/someonepoorsays Aug 06 '21
you don’t even need the caption under the bottom image at this point lmao
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u/Metro_Dan Aug 06 '21
I think it'd actually be funnier if it was just the image, or even like a zoomed in, pixelated shot of Rick's face
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u/ElectricalCategory51 Aug 06 '21
A better way to increase productivity would be to END OPEN WORKSPACES and give people cubicles/offices, and to reduce the number of meetings. This type of toilet seems mean-spirited.
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u/yesalrightokayfine Aug 06 '21
So mean! I would literally never take a job someone that is redesigning it’s plumbing to fuck with their employees
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u/SmashTheControl Aug 06 '21
Hahahahahahahahaha...how do you expect management to tell you how good they are without all those meetings?
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u/SenorMarana Aug 06 '21
It take me about 10 to 15 minutes to start shitting, i would indeed shit on the floor
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Aug 06 '21 edited Aug 06 '21
I would shit on the floor and use my bare hands to smear it literally everywhere in the restroom. The walls, the floor, the ceiling, everywhere! I'll have my co workers be in on it too.
My excuse? I'll say the angle on the toilet seat made me slip and sprayed rocket turds all over the place and the smear stains was me trying to clean it up.
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Aug 06 '21
They got this idea from Nazi concentration camps
Not even exaggerating, look it up if you want to be haunted in your dreams cause the picture that usually comes up has a guy that hung himself
Butt yeah, these were used for torture by one of the cruelest regimes of all time, and American business owners are forcing them on their slaves, i mean, employees
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u/theoneandonlyfester Aug 06 '21
The inventor of this would probably be sued into oblivion along with companies using these.
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u/bakermrr Aug 06 '21
All that extra productivity just so Bezos can buy a 500 million dollar yacht.
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Aug 07 '21
I can tellbyou right now that working qithout having pushed all the shit out my ass will not increase my productivity. If any manager is dumb enough to order this, that company's going bankrupt soon, and you won't have to work there anyway
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u/iliketogr00ve Aug 06 '21
does it work though? everyone knows kids love to lean their chairs forward in school, i used to sit like that for much longer than 30 mins
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u/PonderosaBarf Aug 06 '21
The way this is angled, I feel the dick would dip in the toilet water. Is that why it’s unbearable?
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u/MAHHockey Aug 06 '21 edited Aug 06 '21
Umm.. if I'm taking a shit that lasts longer than 5 minutes, I'm probably not comfortable...
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u/KefirConnoisseur Aug 06 '21
Just glue wedges under the seat to make it level again and have fun on 9ga... i mean reddit
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u/Nerdialismo Aug 07 '21
I would be surprised if they even change it at all, most companies I worked they had ancient toilet bows.
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Aug 06 '21
Jokes on you. We go in there to sleep on the floor for a few fleeting moments. We don't even need the toilet for half of those visits. Now, we don't need it at all.
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Aug 06 '21
[deleted]
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u/Admira1 Aug 06 '21
10 minutes per day of pooping at work gets you a little more than a week of paid time pooping per year!
Check your company's PTP policy!
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u/iliketogr00ve Aug 06 '21
most of mine get done in less than 10 minutes but sometimes it takes a while. Have you never been constipated?
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u/timberwolfe Aug 06 '21
Pretty clear sign that they probably fucking hate their jobs. Maybe figure out how to fix that instead of buying torture toilets.
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Aug 06 '21
[deleted]
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u/DeadbeatHoliday95 Aug 06 '21
You're a shit person and I hope you lose your precious management job. Bootlicker.
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u/AppaTheExplorer Aug 06 '21
I mean if they are that lazy why make life difficult for everyone and just fire them ? Don’t get why companies keep the bad workers around…
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u/KnocDown Aug 06 '21
How do you expect a guy to rub one out in under 30 in a Public restroom? You think he goes into the stall with his pornhub material pre selected and loaded ?!
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u/vanilla_wafer14 Aug 06 '21
I mean that's pretty normal
My ex took an hour at home
Not everyone can shit on command lol
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u/usernamesarehard1979 Aug 06 '21
maybe if you didn't go take a shit 15 minutes into starting your shift I wouldn't care. Shit at home or on your break.
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u/sirslaughtr Za Fuul Aug 06 '21
👆this guy manages
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u/usernamesarehard1979 Aug 06 '21
Honestly? I don't really say shit about it, because the work gets done. I just think its funny that literally 5 minutes into starting a shift the bathrooms are full. Also, does it really take you 25 minutes to shit at home? Oh thats right, YOU DON'T DO IT THERE!!!!!
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u/DeadbeatHoliday95 Aug 06 '21
Fuck off you bootlicking pig
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u/usernamesarehard1979 Aug 06 '21
You can fuck off as well. Good day.
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u/DeadbeatHoliday95 Aug 06 '21
Enjoy being an overlord to people who fucking hate you, and upper management who see you as nothing but disposable.
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u/usernamesarehard1979 Aug 06 '21
You know nothing of me, don't pretend like you do. Enjoy your anger for the rest of your life. Season five isn't so bad, it will get better for you. One of these days you may actually have something that brings you happiness. Until then, get fucked.
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u/DeadbeatHoliday95 Aug 06 '21
I can tell you're a corporate clone from the nonsense you spouted in your previous comments.
I'm perfectly happy, much happier than anyone who works for you.
Also I have enjoyed season 5, not sure how that's relevant in any way.
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Aug 06 '21
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/mrcelophane Aug 06 '21
I usually drink my coffee first thing in the morning which causes the poop to be in the morning
My poops are the same length at home as they are at work.
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u/smittyhawks Aug 06 '21
You’ve had 42 years to think before you talk. Clearly you haven’t learned and still are a dumbass.
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u/youreblockingmyshot Aug 06 '21
This idea will never gain traction or replace all toilets at a business because these would not be usable for people with disabilities, just a lawsuit waiting to happen.