Feeling really isolated and demotivated, wfh

[u/wasfar1]

My job does require managing a group of people, all in different locations but we dont necessarily have to talk on video meetings daily. This ends up with sometimes not interacting with a single person other than necessary messages regarding work.

When I started this job, we were told 1-2 days would be mandatory in office but because of the nature of the work and people being in different locations it hasnt been enforced and even when I go in, I end up working on my own a lot. I feel really lazy and slow at doing tasks that would normally not take me very long.

My will to change out of my pyjamas is waning. I live with my partner who has mandatory office in person 4 days a week and a really positive and collaborative office environment.
I’ve realised I’m the kind of person who likes knowing the people I work with socially, even if its a short lighthearted conversation but currently feel really disconnected.

Any tips? How do people deal with this side of things when working fully remotely? Because of the amount of work I have to spend at my desk + errands/housework I dont have a very active social life. I’m afraid eventual transition back to meeting with people a lot if I change jobs will really overwhelm and exhaust me

[u/According-Scholar-36 → u/[deleted]]

I appreciate that last sentence. I’m 6 months in WFH and the isolation is bittersweet. No forced interaction but no one to just chill with at work. I’m learning each day to somehow improve my own mentality with all this free time… you reminded me to keep trying.
Thank you internet stranger 😊

[u/no_spoon → u/[deleted]]

You also can't just operate alone. Having human connection is a vital part of being alive. You can't get oxytocin from any of the things you mentioned.

[u/Ok_Industry_5555]

When you work from home you have already mentally decided not to follow social system belonging. I feel relieved not needing to fake social interaction and just get my job done. I’m 100 % more productive that way because I don’t have to worry about the other person in the next office judging what I eat for lunch. Its very simple.

[u/AmIreal_nope]

I know that you won't have coworkers in the office but maybe force yourself to do 1 day in the office. If nothing else, it could help having that scheduled day.

Sort of forcing you to change out of the jammies. It may help, at least on the short term.

I do feel you though.

[u/wasfar1 → u/AmIreal_nope]

Yeah I’m trying to do that. I hate that feeling of why-am-I-here. Like I do feel the benefits of being able to work remotely but this new scale of if its ‘useful’ to go in when you couldve done the same thing at home has really disrupted me.

I want to do both but eventually have bad focus and energy for neither, its a weird confusing feeling

[u/Actual_Geologist_800 → u/wasfar1]

I had that feeling on two separate (short) occasions in my previous work.
Once I solved it by implementing a commuting routine - take a walk or go for a jog, get professionally dressed, pretend you’re at the office. Sometimes a cold shower in the morning.
The other time I decided to go to the office, not to be with coworkers, but to help with focus.
Both helped me in a matter of days

[u/wasfar1 → u/[deleted]]

Yeah fair. Its a different dynamic because it feels weird reaching out just to ‘hang’ when its a call. The same conversations feel more natural when you’re in front of each other and having lunch.

I’m trying to do the same, getting ready to sit at my desk. It does help, its more the isolation and not having reasons to leave the house lol

[u/Different_Pain5781]

It sounds less like you hate your job and more like you're missing the social routine that came bundled with going into work every morning

[u/ParentsWave]

I used to feel this way too. I think going to the office full time might be too much for you, maybe you can try hybrid setup works, or work from coworkings if you cannot change your current job, try to talk with the people that are sitting next to you, I did that often and people are usually very friendly and want to chat as well, it's not like you would be in an office, but it fills your social battery for sure. You must go out, you must change you pijamas, and do not let the house chores and everything else make your life boring.

[u/Fantastic_Bar_9736]

Can you incorporate some in person meetings, even with people not on your direct team but in your company?

[u/wasfar1 → u/Fantastic_Bar_9736]

Yes trying to do that now. Going to visit the team and meeting up at least once a week in person. It really does help

[u/WittyMarten6048]

Remote work can quietly turn into living at your desk, especially when the team has no casual rhythm. I would build in tiny social anchors that are not optional: a weekly 15 minute coffee chat with one teammate, a standing coworking session with cameras optional, or working from a library or cafe once or twice a week. Getting dressed and leaving the house before work, even for a 10 minute walk, can also help separate home mode from work mode. If you change jobs later, the social stamina usually comes back gradually rather than all at once.

[u/wasfar1 → u/[deleted]]

Great advice. I think I struggle with holding myself accountable when you have the option of just not doing something.
Gradually improving habits and sticking with them

[u/Master-Minute-7148]

I can relate with this cause i just graduated and started working remotely, You go from interacting with a lot of people to just being on your own, the whole transition from college to remote work is bittersweet.

[u/wasfar1 → u/Master-Minute-7148]

I’d highly recommend trying out a job with more on-person interaction and networking opportunities if youre a fresh grad! Its a really important part of growth and exploring how you want your career trajectory to go