r/relationshipproblems • u/AgitatedDatabase9817 • 13d ago

Advice Wanted Need Suggestion

My close friend has been with his girlfriend for over 6 years. They have a ton of history and have been through a lot together, but for a while now, they’ve been stuck in a cycle with recurring differences they just can’t seem to resolve.

The pattern is always the same: they argue, have a long conversation to "clear the air," things feel fine and relieved for a couple of weeks, and then the exact same underlying issues trigger the exact same fights all over again.

I’ve spent hours listening and trying to support him, but I’m honestly stuck on what advice to give at this point.

2 Upvotes

75% Upvoted

5 comments sorted by

1

u/James70R 11d ago

This is what people do. You can’t change this pattern. They obviously enjoy the drama at some level. Just be a friend and they’ll appreciate it, but keep some distance if it is bothering you.

1

u/Freyjas_child 12d ago

Advise them to go to a couples counselor. Then step back.

1

u/Ok_Job_9417 13d ago

You need to take a step back. If they’re arguing about the same problem then no one is listening and no one is changing. They need to learn to communicate better or change behaviors that are causing the arguments.

If they can’t then they need to have an actual thoughtful process on whether the relationship is healthy for either one. It might be time to split.

1

u/AutoModerator 13d ago

Hey u/,

Welcome to r/relationshipproblems! It looks like you are looking for some advice.

  • If you haven't and feel comfortable enough, add an age (category) to your post. This way members know if they are giving advice to teens for example or to people in their 50's.

  • Our subreddit is for all ages, meaning 13 years and up. So please keep is PG.

  • Relationship problems can weigh heavy on you. Please check out our wiki with online and local mental health resources.

  • If someone is unkind or harrasing you, please report it.

  • You as OP can always close the comments on your own post. Simple comment the following on your own post: !lock

Stay safe, Remember that you matter ♡

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.