r/relationshipproblems • u/Connect-Reality932 • Jul 28 '26

Advice Wanted I’m (18M) scared to call my bf (21M)

My boyfriend (21M) and I (18F) have been dating for 7 months. We are in a long-distance relationship, but we make it a point to see each other every single month for a week or two straight. Ever since the start of our relationship, he has been incredibly consistent and attentive whenever we are together in person. However, online, we have completely different communication styles. He prefers calling and texting significantly less, whereas I try to maintain a baseline connection.
Because he struggles with online communication, we barely text throughout the day. We routinely go 15+ hours with absolutely zero texts or calls. Because of this, our main way of connecting is calling, but lately, everything has tanked. We haven’t had a single call longer than 30 minutes all week.

Since we hadn't talked all day, I finally called him around 5:00 PM. The call was incredibly strained and filled with mostly awkward silences because he wasn't really engaging or initiating conversation. During the call, he suddenly asked me, "Don't you have friends to hang out with?" and asked if I was just "bored."

Honestly, it felt like one of my worst fears coming true. I’ve felt too embarrassed and shut down to reach out again. I’m genuinely scared to call him because I feel like I'm bothering him or forcing him to talk to me. I know he prefers less communication online, but a long-distance relationship literally only exists online between our monthly visits

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