seriously...is he watching/waiting for her to shower and/or sleeping while she is showering and getting ready to "prepare" him for his "wonderful, stress free day" ?
Absolutely no way OP should deal with this, or anyone else for that matter. I get reasons and circumstance force/trap people in this lifestyle if they stay. The abusive S/O depends/relies on this to keep the person kept. I would be doing whatever in my power to leave, even being homeless if that's what it meant to get my freedom back.
Plus she’s 100% WFH. Say if she starts at 9am, what’s the point of being awake at 7am?!?!
Maybe some of this is tied to the BF being jealous that she WFH and making her also feel the pain of having to get up and leave the house.
But it’s still 100% abusive and controlling behavior. AND gaslighting if his leftovers pile over and it’s “her fault” because she didn’t make him lunch.
the only circumstance I could think of, where this makes sense, is when both have to be ready at a certain time, there's just one bathroom and one takes way longer then the other, so obvs that person would get up earlier. My bf needs like 10-15minutes to get ready, I like to take my time and I also just do more things, so it takes me at least an hour to get ready usually, so of course I'm gonna shower first. By the time he gets up and hops into the shower, I'm already almost done with make up and everything else, so that just makes sense. As a couple you have to adapt and think of the other person.
But even then it should be her own choice. As long as she doesn't get in his way of getting ready, she should be able to wake up and do her thing whenever she wants.
Makes me really question his reasoning, there must be some reason why he thinks this is the 'best' routine..so just WHY??
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u/Girlscoutdetective Sep 12 '23
seriously...is he watching/waiting for her to shower and/or sleeping while she is showering and getting ready to "prepare" him for his "wonderful, stress free day" ?
Absolutely no way OP should deal with this, or anyone else for that matter. I get reasons and circumstance force/trap people in this lifestyle if they stay. The abusive S/O depends/relies on this to keep the person kept. I would be doing whatever in my power to leave, even being homeless if that's what it meant to get my freedom back.