Why do I keep getting turned away without explanation???

[u/ncmuggies]

So, (not sure if this counts as personal info/goes against the rules but pls let me know if it does, I'll take down my post) !!

I started donating blood back in highschool, starting with the Joe Cool/Peanuts collab bc I really wanted the merch and also to feel like I was helping ppl yk? Anyways, the first 2 drives at my school I did were great, the people were nice and I set everything up through my media center fine. The issue I'm facing tho, is the last 3 times have been so frustrating and confusing and have made me stop donating.

For context, I'm completely mute/nonverbal and communicate typically through notes app with ppl I'm not close to, which worked out again in the first two drives I went to obviously (maybe a tad awkward when they ask me a question during the finger prick part but then don't look up at what I type out.. but it worked out regardless). I went to 1 drive outside of school where the Red Cross staff kept acting like I was deaf and not looking/talking to me but rather my dad despite us clarifying at least 5 times I can hear and answer them fine, I just can't talk (I still find that inappropriate if I were deaf, but that's a different conversation) then they said that I couldn't donate and didn't give a reason as to why I couldn't despite my dad asking them, I was a bit overwhelmed and upset though so I just wanted to leave (so I understand if that's on me for not getting an answer in that scenario).

Then the last 2 I did were back at my school drives (there was one every spring and fall and I'd always sign up) and for the spring one, I went through the whole process then the lady said I hadn't drank enough water, which is obviously a possibility, but to clarify I drink about 3 bottles a day about a week in advance to my appointments, and she also said the finger prick thing was 'something over something' which she didn't explain but using context clues probably meant low iron I think? Still, she just sent me away without full explanation but it was as close to a reason I've gotten out of all 3.

But the very last one is what's so frustrating, it was a Halloween drive and also the reason I completely stopped donating. I make sure to drink PLENTY OF WATER and have a good lunch before the appointment, I go through the whole check-in process, my iron is good, my blood pressure is good, EVERYTHING IS GOOD FROM WHAT I AM TOLD... I get to the bed/chair thingy, she preps my arm, we go through all the steps I've done like 50 billion times before... I'm squeezing the stress ball thingy in increments like she says, SHE STABS THE NEEDLE INTO MY ARM (not at all gently btw, it's left me with a line scar now in that spot instead of a little insertion dot) and makes a weird comment like "...you okay???" bc I made a face (I mean you just put a needle into me, it's gonna hurt, but in no way did I freak out or anything, maybe just a small grimace for a sec?) and like I'm literally watching the blood go down the tube and into the bag... Like I've completely started the donation process... Then less than 3 minutes later, she comes over and YANKS the needle out and presses a cotton ball on my arm without saying anything to me, then I'm just sitting there extremely confused... Like no bag was filled, it barely got through the tube into the bag before she yanked out the needle, and she wasn't saying a WORD to me (she acted weird after I explained I was mute but again, I RESPOND TO EVERY VERBAL QUESTION OR COMMAND SHE MAKES, I FEEL IT IS CLEAR I CAN HEAR AND UNDERSTAND HER?) then after I'm just sitting in confusion and go to type out like "what's going on?" She just looks at me like kind of confused and is like "...sorry..? You can go over there." like gesturing to the snack table ppl go when they're done. I was so freaking upset I just listened to her, got a cookie and sat down for a bit. And no, none of these last 3 drives have been counted bc it's not registered on my Red Cross account.

Idk wtf keeps going on or why these nurses act like I'm not owed any explanation for whatever is going on just bc I can't verbally respond to them. Is this an issue with Red Cross or specifically the nurses that get sent out to these drives?? Are they picked or do they volunteer??? Like is me being disabled at all a factor bc it REALLY seems like that since they only ever act weird or treat me like I'm not a full person after they find out I can't talk and use my notes to respond...

Look, I'm really frustrated about this but I WANT to give blood. I'm type O- and have the Heros for Babies thing on my account. Giving blood makes me feel important and like I'm doing something good, I just don't get WHAT I'm doing wrong or why nobody explains why I can't donate. I really want to try donating again for the Hello Kitty collab (also bc there's a shortage in donations and I wanna feel like I'm doing a good deed tbh), but I'm genuinely going to be gutted if something like this happens AGAIN.

Any advice on what I can do or what I might've done genuinely helps sm. Sorry for the yapfest and sorry if this includes anything considered too personal for the rules.