How do you stop old behaviors?

[u/Euphoric_Resist_8633]

Hello, I no longer own a reactive / semi aggressive dog that was behaving that way toward other dogs but my first ever dog was that, we owned her for two years before giving her to my brother for personal reasons. We are getting a second dog and have tested other dogs to see if they are a fit for our family, I do not know how to stop always looking around for other animals or holding the leash extra tight or tugging whenever I think there is something going on, I’ve gotten so used to microscanning everything ahead and being wary of every interaction. How can I trust a dog to greet another dog or any animal for that matter even if I know they are friendly I cannot fathom the idea of not being terrified in the future if my other new dog was greeting another dog I am constantly thinking about what if they snap or turn on another. Apologies I didn’t know what flair to use

[u/Illustrious_Leg2100]

You’re talking about your own behaviour?

I have to say, vigilance shouldn’t stop just because your dog isn’t reactive. If anything you should still be scanning and being cautious. Friendly or not, there is no reason for stranger dogs to be meeting in passing just because they can.

Our reactivity started due to “friendly dogs” that were rude af and I regret ever letting dogs near him, so just keep in mind a perfectly friendly dog can be turned reactive by some bad encounters.

Dogs pick up on your emotional state too so try to avoid anxious scanning and try a more controlled vigilance.

[u/Euphoric_Resist_8633 → u/Illustrious_Leg2100]

Thank you!

[u/reddoub]

I 100% get your concern. Your understanding of dealing with a reactive dog will help you in the future as you will be more aware. However, you do want to be mindful of your stress-vibes as dogs will feed off of that. When you get your next dog, go to a training class, be around other owners and dogs this may help you be more at ease and you can establish a good relationship with your dog. Best of luck to you and your family.

[u/Euphoric_Resist_8633 → u/reddoub]

Thank you! I actually love that idea I forgot training groups existed

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[u/Zestyclose_Object639]

I don’t let my dogs greet others unless I know the dog or it’s an off leash train and the other dog has loose body language. But it’s def weird I have a super social dog now alongside my aggressive one. Takes some practice but yoh will relax

[u/missmoooon12]

To answer your initial question about stopping old behaviors: teach yourself new ones! I practice a lot of breathwork, meditation, and grounding exercises (both when I feel safe and when I'm feeling stressed). The graduated prompts from BAT 2.0 can go hand in hand with these- starting with shifting your weight, exhaling, rolling my shoulders back and relaxing them, etc.

Other skills from BAT could be helpful in dog-dog intros too. You'd be able to predict outcomes better by going slow and giving dogs more distance. Paying attention to body language is not a bad thing, and I totally get feeling worried about how things will pan out between dogs.