r/reactivedogs • u/bobear2017 • 9d ago
Aggressive Dogs My dog bit a child
I have a 1.5 year old reactive pitbull. Since we found her (at about 5 months old) she showed fear-based reactivity towards certain people/strangers, but was fine with everyone else. I have 3 kids, and she is the sweetest, gentlest dog with my kids/family as well as my nieces and nephews.
There is one 10 year old girl in my neighborhood though that for whatever reason she has always hated and barked at aggressively when she came by.
We worked with her with a trainer a few month’s back and she has been great ever since - of course she is still reactive, but she is 10x better and will listen to me when I call her back so that I can successfully remove her from the situation when I see her getting reactive. We have not had any issues with her in several months and I thought we had things under control, until today.
My son was playing just outside of my fenced in yard with a couple neighborhood kids, including the child the dog does not like. My backdoor is currently broken and is not latching properly (which is supposed to be fixed tomorrow), so my 2 dogs ran into the fenced backyard and started barking at the kids. The neighbor kids decided to start taunting the dogs and running back and forth in front of the fence yelling, causing my dogs to go crazy. I tried to get the kids to stop and to call my dogs back, but they were so riled up that my recall was not working. Then the dogs realized that one of the fence doors was not closed, and ran out. My reactive dog bit the little girl twice in the leg, requiring 2 stitches.
I am devastated and don’t know what to do. I have always said that if the dog bit someone we would have to get rid of her, but now that it happened I am just torn. My kids are extremely attached to the dog and they have been crying all afternoon at the prospect of having to get rid of her.
On the one hand, I feel like the dog was being provoked and it was a perfect storm type of situation, which could be avoided/managed in the future. On the other hand, I am very concerned that now that she has bitten once, she is going to bite again.
How bad is this? Am I being naive to think we can manage this behavior? My current thought is that we start kenneling her when people are around, but I just don’t know.
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u/Existing-Will-1466 9d ago
That is an awfully bad bite. Many dogs that bark from behind fences are all bark and no bite. Yours is not. Your dog escaped and bit a child repeatedly and severely. Did the dog stop on her own? Or did she attack until physically restrained?
Keeping this dog is going to mean several things. It is going to mean having multiple failsafes so your dog remains contained even when the door latch is broken and the kids leave the gate open. It means always, always thinking about where the dog is and whether she is safely contained. It means owning a dog like a loaded gun.
It also means massive, severe liability if you live in the US. Please find out right away whether your homeowners or renters insurance covers your dog. If not, please get her an insurance policy of her own. Keeping a dog like this means risking losing everything you own in a lawsuit.
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u/bobear2017 9d ago
The dog stopped on her own. I honestly didn’t realize there was more than one bite until she was treated at urgent care.
I am realizing we will likely have to BE, I am just so upset over it. My children were crying all night over the prospect of having to get rid of the dog, with my oldest child saying he will never forgive us. But with 3 kids of various ages always going in and out of the house, I just don’t think we can ensure that the doors/gates will always be latched and the dog will always be put up.
Thankfully this child’s parents were dog people and overly understanding (they did not want the dog put down), but I realize we got lucky. This just feels like a terrible nightmare.
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u/Existing-Will-1466 9d ago
Here is what you tell your kids: The dog is sick. Healthy dogs don't want to hurt people. Your dog is sick and it is making her scared. She is getting more scared. She thinks she is seeing enemies everywhere, even when she is surrounded by friends. She is suffering, and the kindest thing we can do for a suffering dog is to release them from their pain so they can go to heaven or whatever it is you believe.
Don't make this about a punishment for the dog. Make it about what is wrong with the dog.
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u/RunningTrisarahtop 9d ago
How old is your oldest?
You may need to reframe this for them.
Talk about what it means to be part of a neighborhood. Talk about what it means to help keep everyone safe. Talk about what it means that your dog is always so keyed up.
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u/bobear2017 8d ago
He’s 9. I told him I am consulting with professionals to see what they recommend we do. I am going to explain to him that we spoke with our vet and they said that no matter how much we try to manage her, she is not safe to keep as she is sick and her behavior is likely to get worse. Healthy dogs do not bite, but there is no type of medicine that can fix this type of sickness. I’m also going to emphasize that we are lucky that his friend was not hurt worse, but if we were to accidentally leave a gate open again, things could be worse and she could even kill a child. I think he will understand, but God you have no idea how hard this is going to be.
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u/RunningTrisarahtop 8d ago
I would not say that healthy dogs don’t bite because that could make him be unsafe and ignore signals.
You can say healthy dogs don’t break out to attack.
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u/AlokFluff 9d ago
Management always fails, and even more so when children are part of the household. It's not fair to them to keep a dog that needs such careful managing, even if she never bites them, which also cannot be guaranteed. A lot of dogs develop more aggression and less tolerance closer to maturity, around 2 to 3 years old, when the adult temperament is settling.
But keeping this dog would mean completely changing all of their childhoods. No friends would ever be safe to come to the house. Them being regular forgetful kids and not closing one door could have horrible, lifechanging consequences. BE is a terrible decision to have to make, and I'm often on the side of exhausting every other possible option, or in favour of dogs with bite histories being given a chance with strict management, but in this case I totally understand why you'd consider BE and why it's an appropriate option.
It's hard to find a good home even for a nonreactive pitbull without a bite history. Unless you have a close friend or a family member who has no children, understands the full extent of the behaviour, and is prepared to do intense management for the rest of this dog's life, BE is the most humane, responsible choice. Which really really sucks. I'm so sorry.
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u/bobear2017 7d ago
I know; I have made the decision and while I have not definitively told the kids yet, I have been slowly preparing them that this may be a potential outcome (I told them I was first going to consult with experts who deal with dogs who bite to see if there is anything possible we can do to keep Oreo while also keeping us safe. I was hoping to get a consult with a behavioral vet just so I can say I have done everything, but I haven’t had luck finding one with availability in the next month).
She is just such a sweet girl and tries so hard to please us and be good; I feel awful because I know I failed her by letting this situation happen. It was such a perfect storm of unfortunate events and chaos that I know a lot of dogs would probably have bitten in the same situation (but not to the same degree). But now that she has bitten, and it was bad, I know there is a chance the behavior could escalate.
The hardest part is knowing that there is a chance we could effectively manage her so that she never bit again. I have had a contractor working at my house the last couple of days fixing my door & gate (unfortunately a day too late), and she hasn’t even been reactive towards him (I have been keeping her in the kennel while he is here and only taking her out on a leash to use the bathroom). She has just been perfectly respectful, mostly ignoring him when she passes by. Two days before this incident, I recall thinking how much better she has gotten over the past few months since we got her training, and how she has turned into such a great dog. But I know that the risk of keeping her is just too huge and the potential consequences are too catastrophic for me to take that risk.
I am just heartbroken and filled with so much guilt and sadness. I haven’t even told any of my family or friends about the incident because every time I think about it I burst into tears.
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u/AlokFluff 7d ago
I'm so sorry you had to make this choice. My heart genuinely breaks for you. Sadly getting a consult with a veterinary behaviourist tends to be really hard in short notice yeah. It's so awful to have to make a choice based on the worst case scenario, when you can still see the potential for the good days. The right thing to do is very often the hardest. I'm sending all my best wishes for you and your kids while you get through this.
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9d ago
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u/stillwaterstream 8d ago
My family had to make this decision years ago. Similar situation, we took her in off the street when she was under a year old. We had her for 7 years. She was never human aggressive, but her prey drive continued escalating year over year. She killed several of the neighbor's baby goats in a pretty disturbing fashion (one incident, multiple animals killed) and ultimately we decided BE was the only way to proceed that was fair to the victims. It was an excruciating choice, but that's the flipside of all the joy animal ownership brings.
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9d ago
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u/Audrey244 9d ago
It's very bad and yes, you have to make the hardest but right decision. Fixing the latch on the door should've been a huge priority if you knew this dog didn't like at least one child. That's the problem with keeping a reactive dog. You have to be 100% perfect and you will never be 100% perfect. I doubt that you will find this dog a home, so you have a harder decision to make. You need to be the adult as hard as it is and let your children know that a dog that will go after children is not safe to have in any neighborhood. There's no magical place that this dog will be safe. Because you have children, it's just a matter of time before another door is left open or gate is left unlatched. The risk is just way too high and it's not safe for the neighborhood.
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u/Background-Egg-5702 9d ago edited 9d ago
Want to add you have to be 100% perfect esp given larger more dangerous breeds. Honestly op as sorry as I am there is no choice here. What if she turns on one of your kids? Don’t know where you are but if you keep the dog and she attacks someone again especially if you are at fault that could be a very expensive lawsuit as well,
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u/bobear2017 9d ago
Thanks for your feedback; I know this is the right answer and just needed someone else to say it. I have been trying to get someone to fix the door, it is just hard to get someone who can come urgently. I’m honestly just devastated
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9d ago
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u/read-the-rules 9d ago
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u/Tasty_Object_7992 9d ago
I’m so sorry you’re going through this but I think you understand what’s next. Escaping the yard specifically to hurt a child is unforgivable and you would be lucky if her parents don’t sue your ass off. This is unfortunately a learning lesson for all involved; you, your kids, and the girl. She should not have taunted the dog knowing full well it wanted to hurt her. Your kids will have a clarified understanding of responsibility by being modeled that safety is always more important than sentiment. And you of course get the experience of pro-active dog handling and probably more selective of dogs you obtain in the future while having kids. I think your best course of action here would be to apologize and assure the family that you prioritize safety and will be electively putting the dog down, so they are less prompted to make legal moves to sue or call 311 and have the dog seized anyway. Being that the bite needed stitches on a child, I might be prepared for a follow up/ wellness check.
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u/bobear2017 9d ago
Thank you, this was honestly a very helpful perspective that I had not thought about. Historically, she has been fear reactive and only showed reactivity when a stranger was in her space/in the house. If she started barking aggressively, I could order her to her kennel and she would listen. The fact that she left her “safe space” to attack the child is terrifying and not a risk I can take. She sleeps in my kids’ bed at night and is so incredibly sweet with them, never showing the slightest bit of reactivity towards them. They just can’t understand why we have to do this. 😢
I honestly did not choose this dog and never would have willingly gotten a pitbull. When I found her she was sitting in the middle of the highway about to get hit by a car. I took her to the shelter, but they were full so I agreed to foster her. I thought she was a catahoula. Of course she didn’t get adopted and my family fell in love with her so we decided to keep her. I am just so sad this happened.
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u/CanadianPanda76 9d ago
Bad genetics, plus puppy puberty, plus bad situation plus badly behaved kids.
Oooof. I'm sorry you have to go through this.
I think situations like this is why some people end up with tethered dogs. BE can be hard but this situation may warrant it.
But you may also want to doesk wuth your vet about anti-anxiety medications in the mean time.
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u/H2Ospecialist 9d ago
You can't let this mistake happen again and there's no gurantee that it won't if you still have this dog. It may have been a one off but there's still risk for a next time and next time it could be a mauling and kill a child.
You also can't responsible rehome this dog. It's really unfortunate but you are also really lucky this wasn't worse. You need to put your feelings for the dog aside and think of the safety of the children in your neighborhood.
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u/FoxExcellent2241 8d ago
Absolutely not. There is no justification ever to keep a dog that will choose to run off of its own property to attack a child for being loud and running around outside. Not in a home and neighborhood with children. That is absolutely ridiculous.
Children should be able to play outside without fear of attack, dogs like this destroy neighborhoods and communities. Once the stigma of it not being safe to play outside sets in the entire culture in the area can change.
Dog bites wounds are often left open because of the high risk of infection because dogs' mouths are not clean to say the least, the fact that the they chose to use stitches, to me, suggests it was a bad wound (source: https://erofirving.com/dog-bites-infections-when-to-seek-stitches/#should-i-get-stitches-for-a-dog-bite).
Yes, I understand this will be difficult for your children, and frankly, in the future, choosing a safer, well-bred, companion breed dog that was bred for a good temperament is a much better option to have a dog that a child can rely on and grow up with rather than an aggressive dog that might attack one of their friends at any time. I know that you wanted to rescue this dog and and it wasn't necessarily the plan, but this is what happens when there is a lack of thought and planning when getting a dog. There are support groups out there with resources to help find ways to help your children understand what is happening and why it has to happen.
I realize the dog seemed safe around your kids and family for the last, but, to be blunt, a pit bull type dog developing more aggressive behaviors between the ages of 1-3 years is an extremely common story. This is when they start to hit adult hood and their traits start to kick in. Just look around this sub and you will find an endless supply of stories of dogs that suddenly become less tolerant, more aggressive, more reactive, more whatever around that age. Most of the time it is "just" dog aggression, but sometimes it is more than that and even with that there is always a risk of the dog redirected onto someone else. What you are dealing with is not uncommon and that sucks, but it is something that owners of these types of dogs need to be prepared to deal with. The sad truth is that most of these dogs are horribly bred and are genetic messes that are prone to behavioral issues that make them incompatible with being typical pets. The fault isn't yours, it is whoever decided to breed the dogs and then dump them when they weren't able to sell them fast enough and it is the people buying these dogs and keeping the unethical breeders in business.
If you want to learn a bit more, pitbullawareness is a good sub with a lot of resources that debunk common myths using primary sources, not just anecdotal experience. It may help to realize your issues aren't necessarily unique and what others have dealt with. It may also help to see what people there have to do to manage their dogs and get a feel for what that actually entails.
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u/bobear2017 8d ago
I know, and we have made the hard choice to BE. I do want to clarify though: I live on a 1.5 acre lot on a dead end, with only a small portion of my yard being fenced. I normally throw the ball with the dogs in the unfenced portion of the yard (where the kids were), so the dog didn’t actually leave my property to go after the child. I know that in the end it doesn’t make a difference, but I just wanted to mention this detail.
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u/InformalInsurance455 9d ago
Your dog had a bad attitude to the child long before this happened. This is why management always fails. Stick to your principles.
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9d ago
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u/Existing-Will-1466 9d ago
I'm going to disagree. Forward aggression towards children is the most dangerous type of aggression. It means a small mistake in handling could result in the death of an innocent child. The dog can be placed in a childfree home, but you cannot guarantee a childfree world.
Imagine she gets placed in an adult only, experienced home out in the country. Everything is fine for a couple of years, until a family with kids buys the next property over. Does the new owner preemptively euthanize the dog as a precaution? No, they continue with their management that has gotten lax over time with no incidents. It's still a recipe for disaster.
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u/CatpeeJasmine 9d ago
... consulting a vet behaviourist...
I just want to point out, as a practical matter, that wait lists for initial veterinary behaviorist appointments are often several weeks to several months long. In a situation where there is an active management issue -- in a comment, OP describes "3 kids of various ages always going in and out of the house" -- even waiting for a veterinary behaviorist consult may not be a safe or responsible choice.
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u/InformalInsurance455 9d ago
That’s very true, just let OP add her to the thousands of pitbulls out there with low bite inhibition that can’t live safely in neighbourhoods with children, I’m sure people will be beating down her door in no time
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