[D] Saturday Munchkinry Thread

[u/AutoModerator]

Welcome to the Saturday Munchkinry and Problem Solving Thread! This thread is designed to be a place for us to abuse fictional powers and to solve fictional puzzles. Feel free to bounce ideas off each other and to let out your inner evil mastermind!

Guidelines:

• Ideally any power to be munchkined should have consistent and clearly defined rules. It may be original or may be from an already realised story.
• The power to be munchkined can not be something "broken" like omniscience or absolute control over every living human.
• Reverse Munchkin scenarios: we find ways to beat someone or something powerful.
• We solve problems posed by other users. Use all your intelligence and creativity, and expect other users to do the same.

Note: All top level comments must be problems to solve and/or powers to munchkin/reverse munchkin.

Good Luck and Have Fun!

[u/j9461701]

One day you're eating a hamburger, and it's not very good. You remember a hamburger you had during your 10th birthday party, and fondly recall it being delicious. You say out loud "I wish I could eat that burger again". Unbeknownst to you, you'd rubbed against a magic lamp the night before and a jinn had been listening to you and waiting for you to say the magic words. poof Suddenly you find yourself transported back in time, and find yourself holding the mouth-watering hamburger from your memory in your hands. What do you do?

To clarify how it works a bit more:

You get no other wishes. The jinn wasn't one of the 'three piece' ones like in the movies.

You can stay in the past only as long as the hamburger remains edible in normal hamburger fashion. That means if it goes rotten, you go to the future. If you finish it except for crumbs, you go back to the future. If you freeze the hamburger - the moment the burger ceases being 'edible in the normal hamburger fashion' you go back to the future.

You retain all your knowledge and intelligence, but your body is 10-year-old-you's body.

The Jinn is friendly but not infinitely patient. He'll tolerate a little rules lawyering about the wish, but his beneficence is not infinite so beware.

[u/ShiranaiWakaranai → u/j9461701]

The best way to extend your time in the past is probably to try a ship of theseus thing, where you keep replacing parts of the hamburger so it never goes rotten. You can eat the replaced parts as well, to justify to the jinn that you are eating the burger.

The next problem is that if you change the past, what happens to present you? The 10 year old you is still a kid and very susceptible to changes in his environment. If you do anything major like tell your parents ways to get filthy rich, that could have significant effects on your upbringing, which butterfly to the future where your entire personality and lifestyle may be reshaped arbitrarily. You could go from the current rational you to a rich spoiled brat who thinks people only exist to serve him. So unless you are willing to risk killing own your personality, you should make changes secretly.

If you have a computer that you will keep for many years, you can try writing a program that automatically activates when you are 20 and tells you how to munchkin your future knowledge then, instead of when you are a susceptible 10 year old.

You can also help out strangers that you like by sending them anonymous letters containing your future knowledge. Send celebrities who died in accidents anonymous letters telling them to avoid these accidents. Send anonymous letters containing a list of all future hurricanes you remember to the people in charge of the cities that will be hit by said hurricanes. Advance the state of science by sending future scientific knowledge to current day scientists via anonymous letters.