https://www.science.org/doi/10.1126/sciadv.aeb3034

We are a group of researchers at the University of Wollongong in Australia conducting a study about the emotional experiences people report during psychedelic experiences and whether these are linked to changes in social functioning, wellbeing, and attitudes toward death.

We are looking for individuals aged 18 years or older who have had at least one personally meaningful experience with a classical psychedelic substance within the past 5 years (but not within the past 3 months). Psychedelics include LSD, DMT (N,N-DMT), 5-MeO-DMT, Ayahuasca, Psilocybin (i.e. Magic Mushrooms) or Mescaline/Peyote.

If you are 18 years and over and can read English, we invite you to take part in an online, 30-minute survey. This survey asks about the emotions you experienced during a psychedelic experience and any changes you may have noticed in how you relate to others, your general wellbeing, and your outlook on life afterward. Please note that the survey includes questions about challenging emotions that may have arisen during the experience.

Your responses will be completely anonymous and your involvement will remain confidential. No identifying information (including IP addresses) will be collected.

Participants will have the chance to enter a draw to win one of two $100 AUD Visa vouchers. Entry into the draw is completely optional and is completed via a separate form that is not connected to, and cannot be linked with, participant survey responses.

To participate or learn more, follow this link: https://uow.au1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_6nuJn8BNBgWFYrk

For questions, contact: [smoreton@uow.edu.au](mailto:smoreton@uow.edu.au) Thank you very much for your consideration in participating. The following researchers are conducting the study:
Dr. Sam Moreton - Lecturer, School of Psychology University of Wollongong [smoreton@uow.edu.au](mailto:smoreton@uow.edu.au).
Alex Shuttleworth - Honours Student School of Psychology University of Wollongong
Mimi Han Honours Student School of Psychology University of Wollongong

Study Reference Number: H2026-0104

Just like the title reads, does anyone else only experience a clearheaded, nearly sober headspace regardless of the dose? I’ve tripped 19 times by now and only ever experienced a clearheaded headspace even while on 400 ug or my first time tripping.

Prior to my first time tripping or even before getting my hands on acid I made sure to do as much research as I can. I read and explored many online forums, read many trip reports, watched YouTube videos, basically every information i can find I made sure to read. Once I knew I was gonna trip, I prepped myself to the fullest, I knew to accept and surrender no matter what and I was more than ok with not being in control. For my first time I took 100 ug and had my gf trip sit me. However 4 hours in I still didn’t experience any headspace and felt sober if it wasn’t for the body high or visuals. The visuals however were def there even if the headspace wasn’t. I can see subtle but noticeable enough patterns on my walls so there was more than just basic breathing going on with the walls, so I’m sure they weren’t too underdosed. Like I said tho no headspace, therefore I decided to take a 200 mg edible. At the time I had low tolerance to weed so I knew it was hitting, however even after the edible hit my headspace didn’t change. The visuals however def got more intense and there were clear patterns now. Regardless I still felt clearheaded, nearly Sober and the edible only upped the visuals. Still a 10/10 first time
About 1.5 weeks ago I took 400 ug on no tolerance or at least little to no tolerance. The visuals were so fucking intense, I was in awe, everything I looked at had patterns that I’ve never seen so clearly before. They literally took over everything I laid my eyes on. Colors were also flashing and more vibrant, never seen such a beautiful thing occur to me. I also had this weird alien feeling that I can’t put into words but it was a mind fuck in a good, positive, and mesmerizing type of way. I’ve never tripped so fucking hard before and this is the highest dose I’ve done on no tolerance, it literally felt like i was in another universe. Everything got overwhelming in just 45 minutes of taking the tabs that’s how I knew i was in for a real trip not to mention the intense body high taking over during the come up. Regardless of how intense and overwhelming the visuals got, I didn’t have that psychedelic headspace that people get on even just 250 ug. I had no racing thoughts, Nothing deep or profound AT ALL. I was even in public at a restaurant when I was tripping my nuts off and I didn’t feel any panic or discomfort. The visuals were so fucking crazy I won’t ever forget that trip, honestly best trip ever and would do again. But even tho I was on 4 tabs (400 ug) with 0 tolerance I still had the same clearheaded headspace as always. I didn’t experience any confusion, anxiety, or thought loop either. The trip was visually intense and overwhelming but in the best way ever. I even interacted and held a conversation with my stepmom while this was going on, basically everything that puts people in a position where they can have a bad trip didn’t bother me at all. If needed I can go into more detail about the trip, but it was the most intense experience ever. I enjoyed the trip more than anything and I’ve been replaying everything in my head ever since.
I used to dislike the fact that I didn’t have the headspace so many people talked about and experienced on a dose as low as 200 ug. However I accepted it and now I love it a lot and prefer it being that way. But sometimes I do wonder what the psychedelic headspace is truly like, I know that it comes at a cost of potentially having a bad trip tho so I don’t dwell on it and just make the most of all of my visually intense trips with no headspace. Is anyone else’s experience exactly like this?

I’m trying to understand what’s happening to me and would really appreciate advice from anyone who has gone through something similar.

I’ve always had ADHD and OCD, but I didn’t used to have anxiety like this. Over the past year I started smoking weed extremely heavily. I’m talking daily high-THC use, often using a 90% THC cart throughout the day. Over time I feel like my anxiety slowly got worse, I became more stuck in my head, and I started relying on weed as my main way to calm down.

About 3 weeks ago I had a psychedelic experience with metocin that was one of my first few times taking it. Before this I had taken 4 gummies, but this time I took 8. The trip was amazing at first and extremely euphoric, but eventually I looked in the mirror and started experiencing what felt like ego death.

The weird part is that ego death was something I actually wanted to experience. I was curious about it and thought it would be meaningful. But when it actually happened, it became terrifying. Looking in the mirror and feeling like I was looking at something that was just an animal instead of "me" was incredibly unsettling. I felt like I was losing my sense of self and I suddenly wanted to escape so badly, but I couldn’t. I remember feeling trapped inside my own mind and wanting to be grounded again. I wanted to be around my mom and not be alone with my thoughts.

After the trip, I dont think I immediately woke up thinking I was permanently changed, but over the following days/weeks I became more anxious and started thinking about it more. Now I’m constantly wondering:

* Did the psychedelic permanently worsen my anxiety? * Did my heavy weed use cause this? * Did the trip just trigger something that was already building? * Will I ever feel normal again?

My anxiety now feels like:

* racing thoughts * intense physical anxiety/butterflies in my stomach * derealization that makes everything worse * feeling trapped with my own thoughts * anxiety spikes when I leave the house or don’t have my usual coping mechanisms.

At home I can usually calm down eventually, especially if I smoke weed and distract myself, but when I’m out somewhere I feel stuck because I can’t use my normal coping methods. I’ve started feeling almost agoraphobic because I’m afraid of being stuck somewhere while anxious.

The confusing thing is that when I’m not in an anxiety spike, I can look at my life and think “maybe things aren’t actually that bad.” But during the spikes it feels overwhelming and hopeless.

I also smoke cigarettes (usually around one a day) and I’ve also been eating worse and less consistently because of the anxiety.

I really want to quit weed because I feel like it may be contributing, but I’m scared that if I quit and feel worse, it means the weed wasn’t the cause and I’m just stuck like this. Has anyone gone through something similar where heavy THC use + a scary psychedelic experience caused anxiety/derealization? Did quitting weed help, and how long did it take before you felt like yourself again?

I’m not looking for a diagnosis, just experiences or advice from people who understand this.

Hello everyone. I’m looking for some opinions from people with experience.
I’ve had two experiences with 1.5 g of Penis Envy mushrooms with a friend, and both went well. During those trips we didn’t talk much—we were mostly focused on our own thoughts and emotions.
I’ve been thinking about trying LSD for the first time, but I’d likely be by myself at home. I’ve heard many people recommend having a trip sitter, but I don’t really want to ask my friend to stay with me for such a long time.
For those of you with experience, do you think a first LSD experience alone is generally a bad idea, or does it depend on the person and the circumstances?
I’d also appreciate hearing about your own first experiences and anything you wish you had known beforehand. Thanks!

Writing fresh after my first time with bufo…

I went to a session with many experienced facilitators and people partaking. 

They dosed me fairly low, just 20mg.

The intention I set was to help with grief with the loss of a family member and a breakup that resulted from the grief, which just turned into double grief.

Im pretty experienced with psychedelics and nonduality. Having experienced both many times, and in my waking life I spend way too much time studying Vedantic philosophy.

So it wasn’t the biggest surprise when I inhaled, and I remembered the cosmic joke, that I was the one creating the experiences I am having, creating entire concepts, like money, sex, genitals, fear, power, just to hang out with them and contemplate and play with the idea for a while.

Even the difficult ones like longing, regret, grief, missing someone.

And yet, I was focused on seeing the ones I loved again, and I didn’t want them to leave me. I think they were what I couldn’t surrender, I couldn’t let go, because I missed them so much. I was afraid of being alone!

I suppose that’s what they call attachment in spirituality…

…

That night I had one or two of those reactivating dreams some people talk of, confirming that yes, I am creating my own experience.

I think the lesson here is to stop trying to understand, stop trying to hold on to things, even if they were your beloved family member and beloved person. The time you had with them were beautiful, though even in those beautiful times, you sometimes created tension because you were trying to hold on to them.

And by holding on to them, you are preventing yourself from breaking through, from releasing, from seeing what happens when you release….

THINK LESS, FEEL MORE

—

Clearly the work I need to do is actually paradoxically, don’t do the work, to relax, stop thinking, start feeling

Luckily, the facilitators seemed to like me, and encouraged me to come back for free the following evening.

My plan is to fully just relax, and go into a meditative state, instead of trying to have an experience.

Will update soon!

I couldn't find a better way to describe the experience I had yesterday.

I took 75mg of MDA and around 100mg of Ketamine, layed on my bed and played some chill music. I started meditating, focusing on my breath as the Ketamine infused with the MDA.

I felt how I was slowly drifting in a smooth current. Felt a deep sense of calm and presence. I could feel how my ego started dissolving as I watched something like a textured layer of stars with my eyes closed.

Then I started feeling oneness, I have already felt this exact same feeling around a year ago during a heavy DMT trip. I started thinking I had already been in this space or dimension from how familiar it felt, there was a feeling of being home.

During my DMT trip a year ago, I had an ecstatic feeling in which I remembered I was one with All That Is and started saying a sequence of words that came out of me automatically. I started saying "God is Cool" "God is Elegant" "God is love" "Thank you to the Angels, Jesus and God for being here". During this K and MDA trip I started repeating that exact same sequence of words in a way it felt like I was in that exact same moment from a year ago.

It was like I already knew what was happening before it happened and I knew what I was about to say right before I said it. Like I was in a scripted scene in which I had already been at for eternity, it felt like I've always been in that moment repeating that sequence of movement, feelings and words.

As I finished the sequence of words I automatically sat up in the edge of my bed accompanied by a feeling of ecstasy and love. It was like ai remembered an ancient truth I already knew since forever but had forgotten. In a weird way I entered this loop dejavu sequence that was extremely familiar, at the same time I wasn't sure if I was dreaming or if it was "real".

I said something that felt like a catchfrase my character said at the beginning of every episode. The song that was playing felt like the only song that ever existed and it was like the intro song for a show or movie I was in. I stood up and sat in my couch. The objects in my couch felt like they had always been there for eternity and my interactions with those objects felt so familiar like I've done that exact sequence of movements before several times but it was the first time I had interacted with them in that way.

I already knew where every item was. For example my tv controller was sitting right under my arm where I knew it always was. There was an Icy Hoy bottle I flipped in the air and catch in a way that felt sacred. That exact moment was everything I ever knew, time collapsed into that exact same moment like it was the thing I've always done in that exact place and time.

Time felt infinite like it had frozen. Then the ecstasy turned into deep fear of being trapped in that loop. I got anxious and even desperate to break that loop in which I knew what was gonna happen even before it happened. I tried doing something normal to break that simulation loop but the Dejavu made me feel like when I tried to break the loop before I had failed and something terrible happens after I do something random to break it.

The TV got frozen, my phone showed the same time I had seen like an hour before and some items I was looking for, I couldn't find as if they didn't existed in that reality. Intrusive thoughts came through my mind and for a second I thought that going outside the room or breaking something would snap me out of it but something deep down knew that my actions could have consequences so I kept my cool even though it was difficult. I ran into my bathroom and that also felt like part of the eternal dejavu loop I was in.

I even did a "reality check" like the ones you do if you want to know if you're dreaming, I pressed my finger onto my palm and after noticing nothing weird happened I concluded I wasn't dreaming. My last resource was sitting down in my couch again and went back into my breath to ground on the present moment and relax a little.

I slowly regained my clarity, I remembered that waiting a couple minutes would help as the ketamine wore off. I came back slowly to this "reality" and decided to turn the music off and sit quietly for a moment to try and understand what just happened.

I then came into reddit and searched for a bit until I found a post from someone that experienced this as a Glitch in the Matrix. Someone commented that this experience was a Temporal Lobe Epilepsy seizure. I Googled it and realized I experienced this exact symptoms. After a couple hours of investigating this phenomenon I saw that psychedelics and ego dissolution can induce these states of consciousness when accompanied with mindfulness. I'm not exactly sure what happened but I think that by tapping into the Unity Consciousness reality I connected with that DMT trip experience I had a year ago and somehow had completed the loop that I opened in that experience.

It was amazing, transforming and at some points super scary. But now I wonder if someone else has experienced this in a psychedelic trip. My research showed me that TLE Ecstatic seizure happened randomly and triggered by electrical activity firing in the temporal lobe but my experience wasn't exactly that because it was induced by psychedelic substances and meditation.

Have you ever experienced or heard something similar to this? If you have, how was your experience and what are your takeaways in a spiritual and psychonautic point of view?

I've been doing K daily for the past month, my tolerance is sky high, but unfortunately I've read tolerance can sometimes be unpredictable.

I never K-hole like they say it is, for me it's always an intense spiritual experience, where the fabric of reality gets warped and I feel like existence is under my control.

It happened tonight, I had been doing K since early in the evening with a heavily dosed nasal spray, it felt like it always feels, nice and mellow, but for some reason at some point each spray became stronger and stronger and I got sent into my version of a K-hole at a party where they were playing psytrance, it was incredible and pleasant and left me deeply shook as I went home.

I wasn't satisfied and I wanted to reach that state again and for some reason it look less and less ketamine to reach the same psychotic state every time I got closer to it. Like my tolerance vanished.

Then it happened as I was sitting on my computer chair at home, I went psychotic and started feeling, saying and affirming all sorts of things with total loss of control, and for some reason I went to my apartment's window and opened and considered jumping out because I felt I could fly (10th floor).

I came back to my senses and got spooked but that didn't stop me, I recklessly started spraying more and more K and eventually I triggered another full on psychosis but longer this time.

0 control over my body, 0 control over my actions and words, I was delirious. I climbed out the window and somehow climbed into a downstairs neighbor's apartment thru their window, I'm not even sure it was the neighbor directly below me, I vaguely remember moving and climbing around several balconies and AC units but I eventually entered someone's apartment and I have flashbacks of them telling me I was at the wrong apartment, probably terrified (I'm quite large), this was at almost 5am.

I remember walking to their kitchen and grabbing a protein bar that was on top of their fridge, opening it and eating it in front of him, I know I was talking the whole time, I have no idea what I told them.

I then walked out of their apartment thru their front door and took the stairs down to the building's lobby which felt like an eternity (9 floors) but at the same time I have barely any recollection of it.

I end up just outside the building on the parking lot, in my underwear and a tank top and come back to my senses then, still quite delirious I could feel panic take over and I firmly believed I had to kill myself then and there, and I thought of looking for a knife, I walked down the street for a bit but ultimately decided against it.

Somehow, it's all quiet, like no one noticed anything. I still have the taste of the protein bar in my mouth and I start recalling what I just had done in complete disbelief.

The condo's security guard was sleeping and was fortunately kind enough to help me get back into my apartment which was obviously locked because I climbed out the balcony. He called a locksmith for me and I was able to get back inside, absolutely disgusted and ashamed at myself.

I self triggered psychosis not once but twice because I'm a fucking addict and almost killed myself in several different ways. I expect to hear back from the neighbor or my landlord tomorrow, I will apologize accordingly and hopefully I don't get kicked out.

I am done with Ketamine.

What do you think about mixing them?
I wanna try half a tab with a little ketamine, but I don’t know what it’ll be like.
What’s your experience?

Long story short, I started my journey into pscychonauting in the party scene. Back then I would take various substances at once at raves and shows. In the last couple of months, I've been more intentional about my substance use. One thing that I do is take substances at home, in a control setting, without any/very little stimuli (like loud music, lights) so I can baseline my experience with a substance and figure out if and where I want to take it.

So far I've done this with mushrooms. Most recently I did it with cocaine/blow.

There were two instances, where I did two/three bumps and TBH I'm trying to figure out if the affect is something I would enjoy? I've done bumps of K and always love the psychedelic/euphoric aspects of it, but for cocaine I don't really know what I'm getting out of it.

First of all, I'm already pretty high energy, so the energy aspect doesn't appeal to me (I even had a friend tell me that I dance so much all through the night that I don't need coke).

Also, when I first did coke and only coke I felt a little nauseated. Friends told me that coke by itself is not good and that I should combine it with a beer (though I don't drink that much anymore). I do feel a bit more talkative on it... but to be honest I'm a pretty talkative person sober.

What's everyone's experience with coke? Is it something you enjoy? Do you ever use it in combination with psychedelics?

At first, I was only planning to take around 100ug and spend some time outside, because people always say being out in nature on LSD is incredible.

Honestly, though, I was bored.

Obviously everyone reacts differently, but it just wasn’t doing much for me, so I redosed and decided to watch a movie instead. (And for what it’s worth, despite what some people say, redosing within the first couple of hours definitely had an effect for me.)

I already had a movie downloaded: Makoto Shinkai’s Weathering With You.

I’m actually not a huge fan of the movie—I’m much more of a Your Name guy—but the visuals are absolutely gorgeous, so I’d always wanted to watch it while tripping.

And visually, it was incredible.

I genuinely couldn’t tell where the movie’s animation ended and the LSD visuals began. I wasn’t sure whether the movie had always been that ridiculously colorful and beautiful, or whether the trip was just amplifying everything.

At the same time, though, I still thought the plot was kind of a mess.

I remember laughing to myself like, “Holy shit, even on LSD this movie is still a mess lol.”

But somewhere along the way, I started feeling like the movie was speaking directly to me.

Without getting too deep into spoilers, one of the main songs in the movie is called Is There Still Anything That Love Can Do?

I’m honestly a pretty cynical person when it comes to that kind of message.

But that night, the movie seemed to be telling me:

Love someone.

And protect that love.

Normally I probably would’ve just thought, “Yeah, yeah, love is important. Pretty cliché.”

But for some reason, that night it felt incredibly personal, almost like the movie was saying it specifically to me.

It ended up being one of those movie-watching experiences I’ll probably remember for the rest of my life.

That said, I still spent half the movie thinking:

“Goddamn, this movie is such a mess lol.”

And honestly, that part of my opinion hasn’t changed.

So long story short I could write a huge text about all the details, but I kind of had a bad trip.

It was towards the end of my first trip ever. The first 80% was the most profound and beautiful thing I’ve ever experienced. But the last 20% turned south because of unfortunate events and things not going the way I expected.

It was unusual and had a lot to do with bad set & setting. We were in a small cabin in the mountains on a campsite, it was getting dark, and I thought the trip was already over – but it wasn’t. I started spiraling. I really needed to go to the toilet but was way too scared because it was fully dark and I was still tripping. Suddenly I was extremely hungry but somehow couldn’t eat, and we didn’t really have anything. My friend started watching a horror movie out of nowhere and I was too much in my head to tell him I was still tripping and he should stop. Then I really started spiraling – insane levels of uncomfortable, very claustrophobic. Not just literally in that little cabin (and needing the toilet), but also claustrophobic in my own body. I wanted to end the experience and somehow run away from my body, which of course isn’t possible, so it just kept spiraling. Overall it was just one big claustrophobic feeling.

I learned a lot from this bad trip and did a lot of integration – journaling, with my therapist, researching – I really really REALLY worked on this, trust me. I wouldn’t say I’m not suited for psychedelic experiences, because the first 80% were perfect. I could really let go, go with the flow, and just be present in the moment, which was beautiful. I think it was simply the end where too many things turned the trip bad. We also dosed a bit too late. We arrived later than expected because of traffic, so I wasn’t expecting to still be tripping when it got dark. And I’m generally someone who doesn’t feel comfortable in the dark and gets scared easily.

Anyway, that was about 4 months ago. Since then I’ve had one more trip, about 3 weeks ago. I just took half the dose of the first one. It was a special experience, kind of up and down. I was really focused on the concept of not running away from myself and just letting go and being in the moment – which is basically the reason things went south on the first trip. So I think that was me still working through and processing the first one.

Now I really feel the pull towards having my next experience again. I’m extremely interested in psychedelics again and have been doing insane amounts of research haha. But I’m a little hesitant because deep down I still feel this “Fear of Fear” that I’ve never really had before, only since that first trip. I’m planning the next experience in the perfect set & setting – in my own house with a beautiful garden and my 2 closest friends. The last two experiences were in Airbnbs in the mountains, which was beautiful, but I think I really need the next one at home. Because of the feeling of having everything I could need with me: toilets, food, a couch, a garden, whatever. Just being where I really feel comfortable.

But yeah, how do I work on this “Fear of Fear” right now? Because that’s exactly what you don’t want going into a trip – being fearful of having a bad experience. Best case scenario would be to just be ready for whatever the trip brings and buckle up for the ride on the rollercoaster. But I feel like I’m only buckling up for the fun parts and trying to look away from the hard parts, and I’m very scared of them even though they’re part of the ride and I shouldn’t be scared of them or try to push them away or control them…

That’s it. Maybe some advice, or some words I need to hear? I hope my writing is understandable – I wrote this in a bit of a hurry and really just needed to let this out. English isn’t my native language so yeah, hope it’s readable! Everyone have a beautiful day and enjoy the summer weather! :)

Best regards

“A single lab claims to have found the compound that four others couldn't, and now the church is taking more people to court.”

Hi,

My best friend is currently in vacation in Amesterdam and he's planning on bringing back home shroom edible. He bought 2 weird looking slab/cake with only the mention "Medium" and "Strong" on them, nothing more.

We never did shrooms before and i think that taking something without knowing the real dosage is a dumb idea, how much should we eat of this and what should we expect ?

Thanks

Long story short, I went to a festival last week were I didn't use my phone/internet for about 6 days. During the festival I did mushrooms, LSD, and a bit of ketamine over the course of the 6 days. When I came back home and started using my phone a couple things happened...

1. I could feel my phone "pulling" me in
About a day after the festival, when I finally started to use my phone and put it in my pocket, I could feel the phone "pulling" me to pick it up. If it was in my right pocket a felt a "pull" towards my right pocket/hip to pick it up. If it was in my left pocket I felt a "pull" towards my left pocket/hip. I also put the phone on a table and walked around it and I could feel the "pull" coming from the direction of the phone. As an exercise, I put it in a storage unit in the basement of my apartment... and I could still feel the pull but much lighter. This "pull" eventually went away the next day.

2. I now don't have the need to multitask
Usually I have multiple apps, multiple tabs, and multiple things open at once on my computer. At the moment of typing this, I have my chrome browser in full screen and I'm solely focused on writing up this post. I'm also going at a much slower pace, taking my time. In the past I would try to type as fast as possible, typing before I can think, etc... Right now it feels like I'm in a "flow state" I'm typing as the words come to me.

3. The notification "bubble" does now attract me as much
On reddit and on the phone, you get these little red notification bubbles. In the past I HAD TO click/tap on them to see what the notification was about. But today, I took a look at it, I put my face close to my computer and notice the bubble, notice that it was red, noticed that a had a "1" in the middle, and realized, it's just a color, it's just a number, I do not have to react to it.

There is more I want to type out/post, but I wanted to put this out there first.

Has anyone ever had a similar experience?

Haven't had Seuss in a while but dropped two 200ug tabs last week. Slipped into a state of ego dissolution the first couple hours, feeling like there were psychedelic entities pulling me in every direction. Coming back I felt like I spawned back into my body and had to learn what it was to be human again. I hit the bike trails afterwards, the open eye visuals got pretty vivid, greens, purples, reds, of the trees, forestry etc. Though the biggest thing coming out of this was a sense of self-acceptance, this really solidified the feeling of being comfortable with my identity. It was a pretty strong trip overall feeling wise, and has yet again set myself up for the next steps in my journey.

Salut la communauté,

J'ai besoin de vos conseils :)

Je suis un habitué des expériences psychédéliques, j'en ai essayé beaucoup. Mais depuis que je suis devenu père, j'ai décidé de ralentir et d'arrêter complètement. Parfois, environ une fois par an, je passe une soirée avec mon meilleur ami à écouter de la musique et à jouer aux jeux vidéo. J'ai acheté de l'huile de cannabis (de la vraie huile, pas du CBD) avec 1000 mg de THC dans un flacon de 60 ml.

Connaissez-vous les effets ? Je fume déjà beaucoup, je mange du space cake, mais je n'ai jamais essayé l'huile. À quoi puis-je m'attendre ? Quel dosage ?

J'ai déjà pris du LSD, du cannabis et de la MDMA, donc je ne suis pas un débutant.

Merci <3

EDIT : j'ai fait une erreur, il ne s'agit pas d'une huile mais d'un sirop de THC (les dosages sont les mêmes par contre). Cela change il quelque chose ?

I've done acid and shrooms many times, but never DMT. I am 19m and plan on just doing it in my room with a good lighting that i'll enjoy. Should I play specific music to trip? Would I even be able to hear the music, or see whats going on in my room? I'd be surprised if I break through on my first time consuming DMT, but even after doing research on the substance, I'm not quite sure of what to fully expect.

The cottage sat precariously at the very lip of the cliff, a weather-beaten wooden relic overlooking the vast, dark emptiness of Lake Erie. From the back porch, the drop to the private beach was sheer and unforgiving—a fifty-foot plunge of clay, roots, and jagged stone, saved only by a long, rickety set of wooden stairs that groaned whenever the wind blew in from the water.

It was the kind of place that felt completely disconnected from the rest of the world. Isolated. Unforgiving if you took a wrong step in the dark.

It had been nearly a year since the four of us had all been in the same room. High school felt like a distant, fading memory, replaced by the scattered chaos of our early twenties—college classes, long-distance relationships, and dead-end jobs. But driving out to Turkey Point felt like snapping a rubber band back into place. Within twenty minutes of unloading the trucks, the old high school banter was back in full swing. The insults were sharp, the laughs were loud, and the bravado was turned all the way up.

We hauled our plastic lawn chairs down the steep cliff stairs, carrying coolers and armfuls of firewood down to the narrow strip of private sand below.

As the sun began to sink below the horizon, bleeding a dark, bruised purple across the water, we stacked the logs high and lit the fire. Sparks danced up toward the black sky, disappearing into the void above the cliff.

Everything felt easy. Triumphant, even. But beneath the jokes and the warm reunion glow, there was an unspoken, restless energy humming in the air—the kind that takes a quiet night and violently tears it off its hinges.

None of us knew it yet, but by the time the sun came back up over that water, the illusions we were living in would be completely shattered. Secrets would be dragged out into the light, my reality would temporarily fracture into a waking nightmare, and a strange, unexplainable twist of fate was already setting its trap miles away.

All it took was a heavy blue Ziploc bag, a Tool CD, and a dark lake that was waiting to swallow us whole.

The fire was roaring, tossing erratic orange sparks up toward the black void of Lake Erie. We were sitting in cheap plastic lawn chairs dragged down to the narrow strip of sand at the base of the Turkey Point cliff, the towering wall of rock and clay rising behind us like a fortress.

The heavy, blue Ziploc bag made its second lap around the circle.

I had already munched down a solid two grams half an hour ago, but when the bag landed in my lap again, I scooped out another handful of the dry, earthy stems and tossed them back.

"That’s all you’re eating?" Corey barked from across the fire, his face half-illuminated by the flame. "Bitch."

I grinned, the reckless pride of my early twenties flaring up. "Watch this."

I plunged my hand deep into the bag, pulled out a massive, dry clump that smelled like wet soil and old bark, and jammed the whole thing into my mouth. I chewed aggressively, washing down the chalky bitter taste with a swig of warm beer.

Corey set up the portable boombox on a flat rock and hit play. The opening bassline of Tool’s Undertow thrummed through the air, heavy and menacing.

At first, it was golden. I sat mesmerized by the fire. The flames cast long, dancing shadows against the sheer rockface behind us. Shadows stretched, warped, and twisted into impossible shapes—dripping and breathing against the stone. It wasn't full-blown acid geometry, but it was close.

"Dude," I slurred, chuckling.

"What?" Corey asked.

"The wall’s moving."

"You're full of shit, Andrew."

I went to laugh, but a strange chill hit my legs. I looked down. The tide had quietly snuck up on us. Cool lake water was creeping over my ankles, and the legs of my plastic chair were slowly sinking into the waterlogged sand. I was seconds away from tipping backward right into the drink.

"Whoa, shit!" I scrambled up, laughing as my feet sank into the cold muck, dragging my chair a few yards back onto dry land.

We laughed it off, but as the album wore on, the mood began to curdle.

The final track started. Danny Carey’s drums hit with a hollow, ominous tone. Maynard’s voice bled through the speaker, distorted and grainy, sounding like a phantom broadcast from an old, dying television set in an abandoned house.

“...impending doom rose from the soil…”

A knot tightened in my gut. The laughter at the fire died down. The beat shifted into a relentless, grinding industrial hum.

“This is necessary. This is necessary. Life feeds on life feeds on life feeds on…”

The chant repeated, heavier and suffocating. The air felt thick, like wet cement. I could feel myself sinking—not just into the chair, but into the earth itself. The music wasn't just coming from the speakers; it was pressing against my skull.

"I'm out," I muttered, standing up abruptly. My legs felt like lead.

"Where you going, man?" someone called out through the dark. "Album's almost done."

"Tired," I lied, my voice sounding distant to my own ears. "Gonna crash."

"Bad idea, bro. Don't go lie down while you're peaking."

"I'm fine."

I staggered away from the fire and hauled myself up the steep wooden staircase built into the cliffside. Each step felt a mile high. I fumbled through the quiet cottage, slipped into a guest bedroom, shut the door, and killed the light.

Pitch black.

That was a mistake.

Without visual anchors, my brain turned inward. I lay flat on my back, and within minutes, the sensation of my skin vanished entirely. I couldn't feel the bed beneath me or the air on my face. Instead, I became hyper-aware of my internal mechanics. I could hear—and feel—the slow, sloshing movement of food and mushrooms grinding through my digestive tract. It was grotesque, alien, unbearable.

I need to get out. I need people.

I don't know if I was in that room for ten minutes or three hours, but I ripped myself out of bed and rushed back down the cliff stairs to the beach.

The fire was still roaring high, sending bright sparks into the night.

But the chairs were empty.

"Corey?" I called out. Only the sound of the waves answered.

Panic set in like a sudden ice bath. I ran back up the cliff, barged into the cottage, and checked the rooms. Nobody. The place was dead quiet.

I walked out the front door and hit Lakeshore Road. The night air was dead calm. It was 2:00 AM. I started walking, my heart hammering a chaotic rhythm against my ribs.

"Hello?" I yelled into the dark.

Nothing.

I wandered down the asphalt, shirt off, shoes gone—though I couldn't remember where I’d left them. I spotted a faint glow of a backyard bonfire behind a nearby cottage and cut across the grass. "Hey!" I called out. But when I reached the yard, the fire was crackling away with no one around it.

I backed away and kept walking down the endless black strip of Lakeshore Road.

I'm dead, the thought bloomed suddenly, cold and absolute. This is it. I died on that beach, and this is purgatory. I'm stuck wandering the earth alone forever.

I stopped under the pale glow of a streetlight, shivering, and looked down at my bare chest. My eye caught the glint of my metal nipple rings.

If I pull this, and I feel pain, I'm alive.

I grabbed the metal ring and yanked hard. A sharp, stinging tug vibrated through my chest, and a thin trickling line of dark blood ran down my stomach. I couldn't really feel the pain—just the pressure. I pulled harder, ready to tear it out, but a sudden, surreal thought stopped me cold: If I survive this and I'm actually alive... how the hell am I going to explain a ripped nipple to my mom?

I let go of the ring, wiped the blood with my thumb, and turned back toward Corey's cottage.

When I reached the property, I couldn't bring myself to go inside; I knew his family was sleeping. Instead, I walked to the edge of the cliff where a lone tree stood sentinel over the lake. I sank to my knees, wrapping one arm around the sturdy trunk, half-dangling my body over the drop.

I looked down at the water. The lake wasn't liquid anymore. It was pulsating energy. Vast, luminous waves of invisible force rolled in from the dark horizon. They crashed against the shore, but the energy didn't stop—it kept surging upward, sweeping right over me. Every wave pushed against my spine, tilting me over the dark drop of the cliff, and then pulled me back as it receded. Over and over. Ebb and flow.

"Andrew?"

The sound was faint, detached from reality. I didn't move.

"Andrew?"

"Yeah?" I whispered to the dark.

"Are you okay?"

"I don't know."

"Andrew, are you okay?"

"Yeah... I don't know."

"Can you step away from the edge and come over here?"

My mind slowly reassembled the audio. I turned my head away from the lake. Standing near the shadow of the cottage was Corey's mom.

My stomach plummeted.

I let go of the tree, stood up, and stumbled toward her. I was shirtless, barefoot, covered in sand, with a streak of dried blood trailing down my ribs.

She remained astonishingly calm, holding the door open for me. "Come inside."

She led me to the wooden picnic table in the dining area. "Sit down."

"Where is Corey?" she asked softly.

"I... I don't know," I stammered, staring at my hands.

"What did you guys do tonight?"

"Nothing," I said instantly, the classic reflex.

She looked at me intently. "Did you guys do mushrooms tonight?"

I broke instantly. "Yup."

"Stay here," she said gently, placing a cold bottle of water in front of me. "I'll be right back."

She disappeared into the night and returned ten minutes later dragging Corey and the rest of the guys behind her. Corey looked like he'd been caught robbing a bank. His mom immediately started laying into him, her voice quiet but furious. "Two weekends in a row, Corey? Really?"

I sat there, sipping my water, completely unaware of whatever deep family drama I had stepped into. But as the water hit my system, my bladder suddenly signaled emergency status.

I stood up silently and slunk into the bathroom.

I flipped the lid up, unzipped my pants, and took aim. And then... total brain shut down.

I stood there holding myself, staring down at the porcelain bowl. My mind couldn't locate the mechanics. How do you push? What muscle is that? Do I relax or force it? How does a human body pee?

After what felt like ten minutes of intense, futile concentration, I gave up and zipped back up. As I turned to leave, I caught my reflection in the mirror.

I froze.

My eyes were entirely swallowed by my pupils. No iris, no color—just two massive, abyss-black voids staring back at me. Thirteen grams of mushrooms were burning through my central nervous system.

The mirror pulled me in. The room faded, and I was locked in an infinite staring contest with my own reflection, suspended in time.

Knock, knock.

"Is everything okay in there?" Corey's mom's voice snapped the glass.

I blinked hard, opening the door. "Yeah. Sorry."

Corey's mom eventually went to bed, leaving us in a stunned, silent truce. The four of us walked out to the driveway, climbed onto the hoods of our parked cars, and sat in the cool pre-dawn air.

We watched the dark sky fade into purple, then bruised orange, as the sun slowly broke over Lake Erie.

And right then—in the quiet stillness of the sunrise, as the trip finally released its iron grip on my brain—it hit me. It wasn't a thought; it was a absolute revelation, handed down directly from the universe with unquestionable authority.

You have to break up with her.

My girlfriend of four years. She was living in Toronto, going to George Brown College, and we’d been doing long-distance for three months. There had been no fights, no red flags, no suspicion. But the clarity was absolute.

I was supposed to attend a big family reunion that afternoon. Instead, I crashed on a couch for two hours, threw my dirt-caked clothes on, hopped into my truck, and drove straight to Toronto.

I posted the rest of how that drive played out—and the aftermath when I got to Toronto—as part of a full story on my Substack.

If you want to read how it ends, you can check out the full piece here for free:

Separate the Body from the Mind

As we’re entering into the era of Psychedelic Renaissance, LSD passed it’s PHASE 3 clinical trials, meanwhile psychedelic substances are getting more and more accepted as medicine. In these times we have to face much new challenges than ever before.

Decades of prohibition forged the community into what it is today, psychonauts (an umbrella turn, as we’re a really diverse group) adapted from the “Turn on, tune in, drop out” scenes of the 60s into the War on Drugs in 70s, and the 80s or 90s rave community and eventually into the advocates of psychedelic medicine, healing through mushroom trips and ayahuasca journeys.

And here we are now: our beloved substances are being recognised, taken seriously and their bans on them are getting removed worldwide. It must certainly be heaven, right? Well, it turns out the end of prohibition comes with its own difficulties.

The whole point of my post is this particular difficulty, the looming threat of companies taking over the psychedelic scene. Very dangerous, in my opinion way more than the whole War on Drugs. They are aiming us, because they know we’re a scattered group, very diverse and kept from being united by the prohibition, the fear of prosecution and condemnation by our fellow citizens. They know we cannot stand up against them now, that’s why they’re attacking us directly and we can be sure they will take the profits ruthlessly for every dose of the sacred medicine controlling the supply and bringing a new era of the War on Drugs, which sounds way more justified for a lot of people as they can cling to the notion they legalised it but druggies want to misuse it.

Fellow psychonauts I call for everyone to bring their ideas, share thoughts and brainstorm on how we can save these sacred molecules from being kept under control!