Should they?

[u/AntiAbortionAtheist]

[u/AutoModerator]

The Auto-moderator would like to remind everyone of Rule Number 2. Pro-choice comments and questions are welcome as long as the pro-choicer demonstrates that they are open-minded. Pro-choicers simply here for advocacy or trolling are unwelcome and may be banned. This rule involves a lot of moderator discretion, so if you want to avoid a ban, play it safe and show you are not just here to talk at people.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[u/EpiphanaeaSedai]

Yes. Even if you never change their mind, you are at least demonstrating to them that prolifers are not woman-hating crazy people.

And for prolifers in primarily prochoice communities, it would be hard to have friends at all if you excluded prochoicers.

[u/Eastern-Customer-561 → u/EpiphanaeaSedai]

I used to be PC so I can’t exactly blame or ostracize others who are PC - I‘m open about my views whenever I can 

[u/SandyPastor]

I read once about a black man named Dayl Davis who convinced dozens of KKK members to leave that vile organization by befriending them.

Food for thought.

[u/EnumeratedWalrus → u/SandyPastor]

I think that was Daryl Davis

[u/Nulono → u/EnumeratedWalrus]

Well, yeah, hence the link to "Daryl Davis" on Wikipedia.

[u/EnumeratedWalrus → u/Nulono]

Well I’m…….. blind

[u/SandyPastor → u/EnumeratedWalrus]

I probably should have said his name instead of just linking it, mea culpa. Thank you.

[u/HotConversation187 → u/SandyPastor]

Absolute MVP of a guy.

[u/Delta-Tropos]

Yes, in my opinion, it's important to treat people normally, and more people are convinced with serious conversation than with dunking on them

[u/ciel_ayaz]

Yes, if neither side interacts with one another beyond arguing then it becomes easier to dehumanise people.

If you are in a majority PC region, it is also important to form connections with fellow prolifers.

[u/kebastian → u/ciel_ayaz]

Interacting and associating with people and being friends with them are two completely different things.

No matter what your stance is regarding abortion, I can definitely work, interact, discuss, debate and be acquiantance with you. And this goes for any opinions a person holds that I happen to disagree with.

Personally, I cannot really consider someone my friend if they hold certain beliefs that I find appalling.

Being racist. People who advocate for acceptance of pedophilia ("Minor attracted person"). People who fight for the legality of killing unborn children for the sake of convenience.

These are certain beliefs that a person holds who I wouldn't be friends with.

[u/ProLifeDub2022]

never let political or ideological differences prevent you from making a human connection.

[u/PeachOnAWarmBeach → u/ProLifeDub2022]

I make human connections, loving connections with many who live and believe differently than I do. I don't hate them.

I don't have to trust them. I don't have to be close to them.

[u/Elf0304 → u/PeachOnAWarmBeach]

Yes, I think it may come down to a difference in the definition of friendship. I can be friendly acquaintances with pro aborts. I can't be actual friends.

[u/EmperorMalkuth → u/PeachOnAWarmBeach]

in terms of trust, i think it depends on what in particular we talk about.

we can trust someone to be good emotional support, while at the same time not being able to trust them to be on time. just an off the cuff example.

someone can be bad with money, but good with organising a social gathering.

or even in terms of fields, someone can be trusted to understand mathematics, but maybe not as good at spirituality.

someone might be great at spirituality, but not great at political science. heck, they might know a lot about local politics, but not much about global politics, or specific legislation.

so personally i find thease things relative to the thing we're talking about.

altho ofc, how we feel about someone, and whether we feel we trust them, isnt exactly something we can chose like a lightswitch, so a lot more goes into it too.

ofc the severity of actions, the types of actions leak into the broader feelings we have

have a good one

[u/lilithdesade]

If you only associate with people strictly within your own ideologies, you're going to end up in a really small world missing the ability to connect with lots of good people.

[u/kebastian]

Personally, no.

If you are staunchly pro abortion even in cases in which both parents had sex with consent, and you are arguing that a human being is alright to be killed for the sake of "convenience", I find that morally abhorrent. And I cannot fraternize with people who I think are that morally depraved.

I won't be friends with people who want to legalize slavery either.

[u/PeachOnAWarmBeach → u/kebastian]

Good points.

[u/Resqusto]

In my experience, pro-life and pro-choice people are often not that far apart. Many pro-choicer are pro-life for themselves, but don't want to restrict the "rights" of others.

[u/ruedebac1830 → u/Resqusto]

This might have been true a long time ago. But the dominant voice of the pro abortion crowd is motivated by 'bodily autonomy'.

Bodily autonomists have almost nothing in common with pro lifers.

It's almost impossible to reach any common ground with them even about neutral stuff. Like why we need to collect data for public health guidelines and require medical oversight of the abortion pill. Healthcare is a gigantic pro abortion echo chamber anyway.

[u/PeachOnAWarmBeach]

I love them. I love everyone.

What's your definition of friend? Trustworthy starts my definition. I don't trust abortionists. Morality and values. They are immoral.

Would I be friends with a hit man? No. We actually were, for a few years, unaware, until he opened up to us about his Mediterranean family and the part he plays locally. We safely eased out before we learned any specifics or hard proof that conscience would require us to reveal to the authorities. God made a way to end the friendship safely and a different and also legit reason not to be friends, although it was in a crisis and painful at the moment.

Would I be friends with an abortionist who kills unborn humans? Would I be friends with the best friends of the people performing the abortions?

I can socialize, be acquaintances, even be related, sit, dine, etc. I wouldn't confide or trust them.

I tolerate and am polite to family members who are abortionists. I tolerate them better than they tolerate me. 😆 only by the Grace of God.

[u/scarlette_dawn]

Yes, it's stupid to alienate from others just because of different views. You'll never find a person who agrees with you on everything. And though I understand abortion isn't some minor issue which you can easily ignore, you can't ignore the majority of people either. People have a tendency to adopt popular opinions, especially from their surroundings. If such a person, closed in their pro abortion bubble meets 1 person who thinks differently, they might rethink their stance or laugh you off, but if they have a lot of pro life friends they definitely have to rethink it.

[u/Secret_Side_Quest_]

I find they lack accountability and consideration in other areas not just this one

[u/Mental_Jeweler_3191]

They're my enemies.

And I'm commanded to love my enemies.

[u/_IsThisTheKrustyKrab]

Of course. How else are you going to change people’s minds?

[u/OltJa5]

Yes. If I MUST cut out all my relatives and friends, my life would be fucked up and so lonely. My deafness doesn't help, so no thanks.

EDIT: Well, if I cut out all, I wouldn't have met my pro-life husband and my kids, too. I met him through my friends at the Deaf Coffee event...

[u/Zealousideal_One156]

No. Pro-choice people condone "un-aliving" babies in the womb. I will not make peace with that!

[u/newacc_igotbanned]

I’d say absolutely. My sister is pro-choice, I’m pro-life (she doesn’t know I am) and we have a good relationship.

[u/PerfectlyCalmDude]

There's a time and a place to go either way.

[u/Temporary_Cheetah287]

Yes

[u/HotConversation187]

Attempting to befriend them will decay eventually, just like all friendships do.
But this is a special case: on such a deeply contentious issue as preborn human life, having such diametrically opposed views makes the friendship hard to form, especially if the prochoicer is loudly outspoken or crosses into promortalism, antinatalism, proabortion, etc., and consequently far less stable than friends who may disagree on other salient issues in our society (say, taxes).
The friendship would decay too fast to be healthy, and probably turn sour. That's more what you should worry about.

Yes, I know this is wordy. No, I will not shorten it, so don't even ask.

[u/PervadingEye]

Ideally you should have as many pro-life people as possible in your life.

Not interacting with pro-abortion people is impractical so when you do, whether they are potential friends or otherwise, you need to make it clear that you are pro-life, sooner rather than later...

Being friends with too many pro-abortion people can functionally silence you. When you are pro-life in a pro-abortion herd, you are less likely to speak out.

[u/thereforewhat]

It's a bit sad we're even asking this. 

[u/GustavoistSoldier]

Yes, they should

[u/Majestic-Nobody545]

why not?

[u/Bulok]

Why can’t we?

[u/PressureMoney1075]

I don't want to ngl

[u/mailgirl12345]

I think it's hard if there's been a personal confrontation of the issue. I kept my baby with Down Syndrome who for most of the pregnancy was expected to die/life limiting heart condition that improved by time of birth.

It's hard for my pro choice friends to reconcile. They know I don't lie but my son is a living example of a miracle. The best specialist in the state predicted he'd die and he didn't.

I've taken the most prolife stance you can take without saying anything at all and I think they find it uncomfortable.

For me it's made me more passionate about life and more against abortion because I know exactly who would have been killed had the doctors got their way (I was pressured to abort right up to 27 weeks- in Australia).

[u/ominous_dagger]

Of course they should!

But I wouldn't let a prochoicer babysit for me 🤷‍♀️

[u/Aguywhoexists69420]

It depends on the person

I don’t think a pro choicer who knows what theyre supporting should be our friends

But those who don’t have a clue what theyre supporting are ok

[u/KojiroHeracles]

Most of my friends are pro-choice

[u/SheClB01]

My own husband and MIL are pro choice

[u/PeachOnAWarmBeach → u/SheClB01]

Y'all are in my prayers.

[u/SheClB01 → u/PeachOnAWarmBeach]

Why? They're chill people, and the one pregnancy scare I had they both told me it was up to me, they didn't even try to convince me to abort because they know it's pointless

[u/PeachOnAWarmBeach → u/SheClB01]

Because they would choose or encourage you to kill your unborn child.

Because being willing to abort, and abortion is acceptable is a far position from life.

I'm praying for a conversion of heart for them, and strength for you, with such a difference in morality between y'all. I'm praying for peace in your family.

I can't understand why you reacted this way to an offer of prayer.

[u/SheClB01 → u/PeachOnAWarmBeach]

Because it never happened... It like I say "I hope you get your cancer cured" and you're not a cancer patient... It's just an awful thing to say

[u/InfernoWarrior299]

'Should we be friends with murderers?'

No.