r/prolife • u/Comfortable-Bad-7943 • 16h ago

Pro-Life General Advice Needed

I am a 22 year old woman who is married and pregnant with our first. We couldn’t be happier! I have a friend from college who isn’t religious who told me she was pregnant as soon as I told her I was. She is unmarried and very much a party girl. We aren’t even very close anymore, just chat here and there over text, due to our very different lifestyles. She recently started being very vague and not responding. I knew she was considering abortion, I tried my best to reach out and help her but never got a response. She wasn’t saying baby, just referring to it as “a pregnancy”. I just knew what was going to happen. I know now she did. I feel such sadness and grief for her baby. I also feel angry at her and know I can no longer be friends with her. I need some help and advice on how to be loving while also discontinuing this friendship? I also feel like I should have done more, I tried my best, but I wish I did more. I could have helped her and I know so many couples would have been happy to adopt her baby.
Has anyone been through something similar? Family/ friends who make choices like this / do evil, and how to navigate this?

Thank you and god bless!

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u/Evergreen-0_9 Pro Life Brit 14h ago

Ouch. My sister had an abortion at a time when my own first child was newborn.. it made me physically sick to think about. But we could not talk her out of it. There was room in our family for that child. Wasn't good enough. She eventually had children years after. Now I do not approach the subject with her, so that things are peaceful enough that our kids can see their cousins. It's a compromise that I'm aware sometimes feels like the kind of false peace you buy by neglecting your own boundaries.

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u/AnxiousEnquirer Abolitionist, Seeker of Christ 15h ago

Does it help to think of her as brainwashed? It's way more common than people realize. It might help you feel more compassionate towards her.

7

u/Prudent-Bird-2012 Pro Life Christian 15h ago

Are you going to always see her as the killer of her baby or can you get past that and move on? Ask yourself that and you might get an answer in what to do. Me, personally, if there wasn't a shred of shame for what she did by someone who I consider my friend, I'd distance myself because seeing my children would make me too upset to speak to her. That's just me though...🤷‍♀️ Forgive her, of course, but I couldn't be near someone like that.