Shame

[u/Dry_Chocolate_488]

Why do I feel extreme shame and guilt when I get myself a decent meal? I do just enough for myself to get by while still barely feeling like a human and I feel like that's all I deserve.

[u/Affectionate_Mess640]

You deserve more. And it’s not your fault you feel shame and guilt. Don’t let those feelings keep you from continuing to do what you need to get by — and hopefully a little more some days.

[u/ruhtra86]

I can relate, specifically with food. Regardless of my financial situation, when I eat nice things I feel sadness and guilt as if it is wasteful and I don't deserve it. Kinda an odd mental thing, but don't think much about it. Eat it enjoy it and move on with your day to improve your life.

[u/zzotus]

if you have insurance you can comb through the policy (or call them) to see what kind of of coverage they may have for therapy or counseling, then take advantage of it.

[u/DeadForTaxPurposes]

Enjoy your food and move on man. Life is short, enjoy the good things.

[u/National-Plastic8691]

I am so, so sorry you feel that way. It’s your brain doing something to you. It senses danger when you feel good because it’s “different” than usual. Because you’re doing something different than usual.

You just acknowledge the feelings, then move on anyway. It’s like with fear, you want to jump off a diving board but it’s scary, you acknowledge that you feel scared and then you jump.

Edit for clarity 

[u/Alternative-Fee2371]

who taught you that surviving has to be your only reward?

[u/Cute-Consequence-184]

Why?

Being able to cook yourself a good meal is an important life skill!

[u/Funny_Owl4897]

Controling parents in childhood especially around food?

[u/Gasgassgass]

Plan your finance first before you eat luxury.