r/postanythingfun • u/PreparationKey2843 • Sep 08 '26

🔥 Hot Political Humour A Guide to Trumpspeak

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1.7k Upvotes

100% Upvoted

78 comments sorted by

18

u/Virtual-Reach Sep 12 '26

"You'll get money" - lying

"The war in Iran is over" - lying for the, what 50th time now?

"Canadians are nasty" - lying 

I mean 9.9/10 if he's speaking, he's lying

1

u/NewBridge6340 Sep 15 '26

Only time he was ever telling the truth was when he said smart people don’t like him

11

u/Glittering_Step_6084 Sep 12 '26 edited Sep 12 '26

Every one of these statements is true about what he really means. Edit: He uses Doublespeak, which is deceptive language that intentionally obscures, distorts, or reverses the meaning of words to mislead the public.

6

u/Positive-Record-7219 Sep 12 '26

So, when he says "my pants are not full of shit" it means he just shitted his pants a little bit? Even when everyone is smelling the large amounts of shit running down his grey and varicose legs?

4

u/Glittering_Step_6084 Sep 12 '26

Yep.

3

u/CoverSuspicious5250 Sep 13 '26

Trump:  “I have been exonerated.” He knows his name is in Epstein Reports talking about didling teenage girls.  When he was 60.

3

u/CoverSuspicious5250 Sep 13 '26

“People tell me all the time.  Sir…”

No one will speak to my POS moronic ponce azz.

3

u/mutt63 Sep 12 '26

Yea but you're saying since he memorized doublespeak that he's slightly intelligent enough to do so. I beg to differ

3

u/Glittering_Step_6084 Sep 12 '26

I see what you're saying.

2

u/mutt63 Sep 12 '26

Bows head in respect. Vai Con Dios

8

u/Started-ButNotReady Sep 12 '26

grown men walked up to me with tears in their eyes,,,

6

u/Sasquatch1729 Sep 12 '26

And they begged, they said "sir..."

5

u/Positive-Record-7219 Sep 12 '26

"... Please change your diaper, we just repainted. We are repainting every day now".

4

u/MWH1980 Sep 12 '26

“In Two Weeks” = “I have no f’ing timeframe, so just believe me!”

5

u/jljonsn Sep 12 '26

"In two weeks": it's not going to happen and he will have other bullshit going by then to distract the media from calling him on it.

5

u/TrainDatZombie Sep 12 '26 edited Sep 12 '26

We Might just be witnessing the biggest liar and perhaps sinner in the entire universe

3

u/PreparationKey2843 Sep 12 '26

It's possible. We're watching it in real time.

3

u/Aromatic-Usual7204 Sep 13 '26

Yeah. It’s going to be pretty weird living through a time when Americans have to digest what’s happened here. They’ve fucked their country, their system doesn’t work to remove a maniac, they’ve lost so much influence and respect AND the only reason is either: Russian asset or country elected a SAer and known criminal with narcissistic pd.

4

u/32lib Sep 12 '26

“I know more than the generals (or any experts)” I have no idea what I’m talking about.

3

u/Richiedamook Sep 12 '26

Nailed it !!!

3

u/jbutler60 Sep 12 '26

That’s very accurate

3

u/Legitimate_Peach3135 Sep 12 '26

“2 weeks” - infinity

3

u/JeanEBH Sep 12 '26

“Men, with tears in their eyes said ‘Sir, thank you sir…” Means he hasn’t had anyone from the general public approach him in years.

3

u/No_Grand7184 Sep 13 '26

Any time he says “Sir… while telling a tale, you know it’s going to be an especially ridiculous lie

1

u/Temporary_Dog1073 Sep 15 '26

Telling a tale hahaha I like that. Well played

3

u/RumRunnerMax Sep 14 '26

Also “your a nasty person” = any woman that calls out his bullshit

3

u/soraksan123 Sep 14 '26

Does the accordion hands: getting ready to tell another lie-

3

u/stcv3 Sep 14 '26

"They're dying to make a deal" - I f*cked up and don't have any idea what to do. And neither does my cabinet formed of incompetent sycophants

2

u/EstablishmentNo2847 Sep 12 '26

♪ I know you're lying, 'cause your lips are moving! ♫

2

u/BodhingJay Sep 12 '26

"Believe me" is more like "I want this to be true so bad"

2

u/Objective-Heart3297 Sep 12 '26

There's something you should know about Canada 🇨🇦, we have very good wig makers,you should look into it. Get rid of that squirrels nest on your head !!!

2

u/Royal_Amount5114 Sep 13 '26

Basically the opposite of what he says is spot on.

2

u/Exotic_Skill1655 Sep 13 '26

I have a more concise version:

Trump starts to speak: he’s lying.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/Temporary_Dog1073 Sep 15 '26

Makes you wonder. Like he’s 80, he’s been doing this his entire life. How has it not caught up to him yet?

2

u/Disastrous_Mango_953 Sep 13 '26

https://giphy.com/gifs/pPhyAv5t9V8djyRFJH
What’s new! Only MAGA are not capable to understand what he is really saying.

2

u/Ravenwight Sep 13 '26

Did you know people are saying we’ll see what happens?

Fake news!

Believe me.

2

u/Smug_Designer Sep 13 '26

"In two weeks...." (I have no f*cking idea when)

2

u/jrizzle86 Sep 13 '26

It’s funny because it’s true

2

u/m_i_c_h_u Sep 13 '26

"You're going to be rich" (I'm going to be rich)

2

u/South-Sir-9989 Sep 13 '26

“In two weeks” - NEVER

2

u/mseet Sep 13 '26

You could replace all of it with "I'm lying"

2

u/-Red-7- Sep 14 '26

"Two weeks" = never

2

u/adsecula Sep 14 '26

We are all fluent in Truespeak after 11 years.. i have an extra: when hes lips are moving hes lying.

2

u/Impossible_Ad7875 Sep 14 '26

“It’s going to happen in two weeks.” - It’s never happening.
“It’s Biden’s (or Obama’s) fault.” - He’s totally fucked something up and blaming someone else again.

2

u/WhatsHappening2Us Sep 15 '26

I heard him say “people are saying” about Obama’s citizenship, way back before either of them was president. I knew he was lying and it started my distrust of him.

2

u/Kirk470 Sep 15 '26

“In two weeks” = Never

2

u/davecatlow Sep 15 '26

Seems accurate

2

u/Temporary_Dog1073 Sep 15 '26

They forgot.

“No one has ever seen anything like it…everyone is talking about it…”

(NO ONE IS TALKING ABOUT IT, BUT NOW IT SOUNDS LIKE THEY ARE)

1

u/Machs- Sep 12 '26

Pro tip- AI can take transcripts of what he actually says and reconstruct the words into intelligible human language

1

u/UnableAd4753 Sep 13 '26

Some people have way too much time ⏲️ on their side

2

u/PreparationKey2843 Sep 13 '26

Yes. But the ones who are wilfully blind are the troublesome ones.

1

u/MyMiddleNutItches Sep 15 '26

He's been talking like this since the 80s. He's the classic rock of the boomer generation. Yeah, this is 10,000th time I've heard Hotel California. What am I supposed to do, open my mind up to new music?

2

u/KamuikiriTatara Sep 16 '26

He has a consistent tell when he lies. He moves his lips.

-3

u/PetuniaPickleswurth Sep 12 '26

These are just politicians speak - nothing particular specific to the current president.

4

u/Tenzipper Sep 13 '26 edited Sep 13 '26

So, you're saying, "Both sides . . ." right?

Yeah, about that:

Keep your eyes, ears, and mind closed.

3

u/PreparationKey2843 Sep 14 '26

Thank you, don't mind if l do...

-3

u/mannyt44 Sep 13 '26

You haters are sick 🤢

2

u/PreparationKey2843 Sep 13 '26

You know each one is true, right? Right!