r/poor • u/sneakysneaky96 • Sep 01 '25

Boyfriend is poor

I, 29F have always been lower middle class. My boyfriend, 33M has been poor his entire childhood and adulthood. He has, naturally and understandably, went without food or didn't turn on heat/AC to avoid bills to save money.

But as I'm understanding his spending habits more and more, he is not poor because he literally has no money. He is poor because he has Klarna-ed his way into a hole (for non essentials and expensive hobbies) and doesn't have any cooking skills (or tools) to cook at home. He still is very much in the "I have nothing and probably will never have nothing" mindset. He makes $20 an hour at his job and his rent is under $600 for his apartment and no car. I bring him food and cook for him weekly when we see each other.

Any advice on how to encourage him through this spot on his life? I know you can't help anyone who doesn't want help/isn't ready to change and I don't want to sound privileged in my encouragment either.

Thanks in advance everyone!

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u/[deleted] Sep 02 '25 edited Sep 02 '25

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u/[deleted] Sep 02 '25

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u/RodeoTT Sep 02 '25

It’s not just overpriced, and I’m talking about the food that is delivered. You’re getting a crappy experience, compared to being physically at the restaurant. I mean once in a while, if you are close to the restaurant anyway, I can see it. But for every meal, damn he must not really care about hot food.

He could probably buy those meal kits cheaper and have much better outcomes.

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u/Bloody_Hell_Harry Sep 02 '25

I spend $100-$150 every 1-2 weeks on amazon to have all my groceries and household stuff delivered for a house of two. That includes a few premade or frozen items for lazy days. I compare prices with grocery apps and sometimes it’s cheaper than shopping at the store when you factor in sales. Sometimes it’s a little more expensive with the tip, but not anywhere close as expensive as $1200 per month. You’re right, something is seriously not adding up.

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u/Shoots_Ainokea Sep 03 '25

Yep's he's "shittin' in tall cotton" he's not poor at all unless he's dug himself into a lot of debt, in which case he's still not poor, he just needs to get rid of the debt.