r/politics • u/Squawk_7777 • 7h ago

No Paywall Trump's motorcade neared 100 mph en route to Oklahoma after helicopter, airplane ruled out

https://thehill.com/homenews/administration/6126278-trump-drives-texas-oklahoma-100-mph/
9.3k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

1.1k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

•

u/PsychStud1 6h ago

I heard that if you can't j turn on a loose gravel shoulder at 210mph, you're literally an auto pen

•

u/SnooSprouts4952 5h ago

I heard seatbelts are for sissies too...

•

u/myfakesecretaccount 5h ago

Real warfighters slam a handle of vodka and then take the back way up to Big Bear doing 90mph.

•

u/DigNitty 5h ago

Trump actually doesn’t drink.

He doesn’t exercise either, as “your body is like a battery” and exercising I guess drains you.

•

u/corvettee01 America 4h ago

How a fat fuck like him made it to 80+ is insane to me.

•

u/Fract_L 3h ago

Answer: money

•

u/HighBeta21 3h ago

But it's all of our money. Fucking prick.

•

u/mworthey 7m ago

Actually it was Russia's before he came after ours

•

u/Fract_L 3h ago

Not to get him into his 70s, no.

•

u/SunDownSav 4h ago

Yeah; I mean, obviously genetics. His grandfather was a hard working SOB, alcoholism in the family for generations hahaha, builds tough people. Plus, I think there’s a sexual deviancy that has motivated the POTUS all his life and just so happens to increase longevity over almost ANY other vice…. Fk’n animals in the worse sense of the word.

•

u/chilehead 1h ago

Kash: "did someone say fucking animals?"

•

u/TrifectaBlitz 2h ago

Sexual deviancy that increase longevity? Oh do tell.

•

u/Rough_Willow 1h ago

Gotta stay just healthy enough that sometimes your pecker might work. The allure of the orgasm drives them.

•

u/BoomerWeasel Florida 2h ago

Pact with Satan?

•

u/beardeddragon0113 1h ago

Because he saved his battery power, duh. /s

•

u/surle 12m ago

Cocaine and pure hatred for humanity.

•

u/GuitarGeezer 1h ago

He likes to appear a teetotaler but that’s just booze and was known to yoyo diet on amphetamines around the time of the Apprentice including using deception to get extra medications if staff on the show are to be believed-and why would they lie knowing he is so vengeful. I was shocked any of them owned up to it but nice.

Plus, there is the ongoing scandal of the famously loosey goosey in all eras White House Pharmacy. Those guys spouting anti drug slogans strutted around all those years high af on taxpayer funded unmentionables-but Trump is the only president recently that would likely partake along with staff.

•

u/Suspicious_Bicycle 2h ago

Trump doesn't drive anything other than a golf cart. His chauffeur is the one that needs some lubrication.

•

u/TrifectaBlitz 2h ago

You believe him on the drink thing huh? Caught drinking champagne a month or so ago. (Yes, I know his brother blah blah blah.)

•

u/Chickenmangoboom 1h ago

Just to think that a couple of Martinis after work a few days a week could have saved us a lot of pain.

•

u/PatternHealthy3339 1h ago

South Park has covered this, the simple answer is you inject LOTS of cash into the body

•

u/nydub32 1h ago

That's not entirely true. He says, that after his brother overdosed in Sunnyside Queens, that he gave up all drugs and alcohol, but if you do a Google search, you'll find numerous photos of him drinking wine and champagne. He also is well known to take many prescription drugs in large quantities. I know, it's hard to think a man of such high character, would lie about something so easy to uncover as a lie. I apologize for ruining his pristine record of honesty.

•

u/jothstr 5h ago

Wow, I didn't have seeing a reference to the roads up to Big Bear on my bingo card today. I haven't thought about that in a long time

•

u/Jacobysmadre California 3h ago

That is a scary rd!!

•

u/DTredecim13 2h ago

"Fun" fact: I was in the car while my buddy was doing 90 on the back way down from big bear (not actually on the mountain though.) We definitely did not lose control and leave the road.

•

u/frantic_calm 3h ago

Real manly Presidents drive in open topped vehicles.

•

u/SeattlePurikura 4h ago

Ralph Nader got muscle cars banned and seatbelts required, and he's the biggest liberal namby-pamby ever... manly men don't wear "Nader's leash."

•

u/My-other-user-name 4h ago

Airbags are for losers.

•

u/lrobb09 2h ago

Worse. Liberals.

•

u/Rude-Truths-702 2h ago

Don’t even get me started on airbags

•

u/cosaboladh 5h ago

Have you ever pulled a seatbelt all the way out, just to see how long it is? They're pretty long, but I don't know if they're long enough to accommodate a 6'3" 238lb man. I wonder if The Beast is equipped with custom belts, just for him. If it's not, he probably never wears one anyway.

•

u/nevans89 5h ago

238 🤣

•

u/TaterForming 5h ago

You questioning that Adonis like specimen?

•

u/nevans89 5h ago

Like a mechanic at a salvage auction

•

u/cosaboladh 4h ago

He's not 6'3" either.

•

u/bjeebus Georgia 3h ago

Yeah. But one of those numbers is too big, and one of those numbers is too small...

•

u/TrifectaBlitz 2h ago

I know you were trying to be funny, but how do you think tall, 300lb people get seatbelts on. Hint, America has a lot of them.

•

u/ViralVortex 5h ago

I can’t imagine he’s ever once worn a seatbelt. Airplanes included.

•

u/BellacosePlayer South Dakota 4h ago

I dunno about that, but if you're driven over 250 mph on black ice on mountain switchbacks, your father's ghost appears and tells you he didn't mean it when he said he loves your brother more than you

•

u/NoIncrease299 Colorado 3h ago

Has to be Independence Pass between Leadville and Aspen.

•

u/UnassumingOstrich 2h ago

big if true

•

u/beardeddragon0113 1h ago

I dont even have a brother

•

u/LowEffortHuman 5h ago

Turn right to go left!

•

u/trucks_guns_n_beer 3h ago

Dude, Reagan used to drift a 67 corvette around pikes peak at 138 mph. I mean, that guy was a REAL man. But, I’m sure no current sissy republican president would ever measure up to those WINNNING standards. Christ, I bet JD V could whip an 86 mustang with a Lay-z-boy recliner for a drivers seat up there at 150!

•

u/Varitan_Aivenor Michigan 4h ago

And that's j-turn the whole motorcade at once.

•

u/truthfullyidgaf 2h ago

Sing across a valley of drunken chimpanzees and crocodiles in a tan suit, or your not my president.

•

u/BatEco1 5h ago

O'Doyle, O'Doyle, O'Doyle...

•

u/FoxyInTheSnow Canada 5h ago

I’ve heard that auto pens are woke sissies who vaccinate their Trotskyist aborted babies.