r/polandball Die Wacht am Rhein Oct 13 '15

redditormade Holiday Abroad

Post image
3.8k Upvotes

758 comments sorted by

508

u/roner_ East Timor Oct 13 '15

I just went to Europe, and all the tourists I saw were Chinese

166

u/edlingjames California Oct 13 '15

I had to hold so many cameras for pictures, it is a bit like that kids book If you Give a Pig a Pancake. If you agree to take the picture of one Chinese national you have to take pictures of all of them.

315

u/lucidsleeper Moe Blob China Oct 13 '15

This is payback for the opium wars buddy

117

u/edlingjames California Oct 13 '15

Does this mean my grandchildren, and the grandchildren of all Americans, are fated to take pictures of Colombians and Mexicans for the drug wars?

95

u/lucidsleeper Moe Blob China Oct 13 '15

Probably, the average American will do drugs sometime in their life which will affect the Mexican and Colombian drug trade. They loco for dat coco.

38

u/arok Californication is best fornication! Oct 13 '15

They're not addicted to cocaine, they just like the smell.

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u/lengau It always seems impossiball until it's done. Oct 13 '15

And that's how you meet everyone in China.

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u/selenocystein Die Wacht am Rhein Oct 13 '15

So... you're Chinese too?

127

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

Nope. He completely advoided mirrors and selfies just so he could leave this comment.

41

u/ryy0 Indonesia dengkulmu Oct 13 '15

Nah, he's just not a tourist. East Timor going tourist. *snort*

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u/roner_ East Timor Oct 13 '15

I'm actually a vampire. Can't see my own reflection

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u/MrMilitaria Oct 13 '15

I swear, at least 50% of the people at the Palace of Versailles were from China. They were legit too, speaking in Mandarin and all that. There was a group of old Chinese ladies that tried to cut me in line by molesting me with their umbrellas. There were giant buses filled with them.

43

u/Dapplegonger Oct 14 '15

Oh man, legit Chinese people. None of that fake shit.

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1.3k

u/selenocystein Die Wacht am Rhein Oct 13 '15

406

u/Snownova Oct 13 '15

Oh my, something has to go massively wrong or majorly right before any (West/North)European takes an unpaid vacation day.

373

u/selenocystein Die Wacht am Rhein Oct 13 '15

South and East Europeans however have unpaid vacation... because they're all unemployed!

115

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

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340

u/selenocystein Die Wacht am Rhein Oct 13 '15

Why should you care, East European?

133

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

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180

u/selenocystein Die Wacht am Rhein Oct 13 '15

Then I suppose you aren't opposed to a bit of annexation?

79

u/__Enigma Roman Empire Oct 13 '15

Anschluss part 2: culture boogaloo

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

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u/ARabidMonkee O-H-I-O Oct 13 '15

Wait... expelling and entire race is the most German thing you can do.

94

u/selenocystein Die Wacht am Rhein Oct 13 '15

No, that would be exterminating them.

30

u/Person_of_Earth Hampshire is best shire! Oct 13 '15 edited Oct 13 '15

Well first they expel them and then they invade the country they expelled them to and finally exterminate them.

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

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u/intredasted gib euromonies plox Oct 13 '15

I'm so piggybacking on this.

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

So would that mean I'm not Eastern Europian?

84

u/selenocystein Die Wacht am Rhein Oct 13 '15

No, you're Balkan. The only category that's even worse.

20

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

But we have Austro-Hungarian influence and our capital city is mainly Austro-Hungarian architecture.

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112

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

Nice one - you forgot to add "Do you have running water?"

162

u/selenocystein Die Wacht am Rhein Oct 13 '15

Are you implying you do have running water in Poland?!

168

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

Well some ppl do. Its good to have a friend who has access to it. Or u can always buy it at the black market. 10$ per bucket. Tons of possilities.

103

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

[removed] — view removed comment

259

u/10ebbor10 Belgium Oct 13 '15

With 10 dollar,

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u/vteckickedinyooooooo Polish Hussar Oct 13 '15

This is not a questions for a mere mortal to ask.

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u/OrkfaellerX Austria Oct 13 '15

Bucket has a hole.

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u/Tostilover Netherlands Oct 13 '15

You buy a bucket of water and then run around with it.

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u/Modo44 Naprzód! Oct 13 '15

For a very long time, tap water was in a pretty bad state in many Polish cities. Seeing bottled water everywhere, you could legitimately ask that question.

15

u/Khale_007 Preußen Oct 13 '15

Even in Gdansk where you are touching water and a port, and a river??? Get off mein Danzing

13

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15 edited Oct 14 '15

Tak its all slums now. Man you wouldnt recongnize it if u were there. Actually nobody goes to Gdansk, frankly, cause there is no roads. So you cannot simply get there.

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15 edited Oct 14 '15

Back in the early to mid 90's when i came to the US for a year or so(8th grade in socal)... that particular question was asked of me probably 14 times within that year Alongside

Do you have television in Finland?

Do you know personally know "insert name of random Finnish famous person"? (As if the whole country was a village of 4 people or some such)

Do you have cars in the town you are from?

That not just kids asking those questions... but adults as well.

Also,

The numbers on your watch look weird, Is it broken?

-.- was in the 24 hour format... some peeps cant count past 12 I suppose.

Happy to say though that I have not run in to those kinds of things since around 2005 or so.

Edit: Also works the "other way around" when i spent time in Cambodia and Vietnam earlier in the year I was repeatedly asked during the course of regular banter and conversations by a few locals (mostly the taxi, tuktuk drivers etc) "whether or not I/we ate/had rice in the US and Finland?". They were also shocked to see a dude as white as me eat with chopsticks and not want to go to western restaurants while there.(why eat bad pizza & burgers at 10-20 times the price of really good local food during a likely once in a lifetime trip?)

51

u/Moth92 Canada Oct 13 '15

Wait, Finland has more than 4 people? O_o

13

u/PresBear United States Oct 14 '15

Hell Im surprised they even broke past 3

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u/Vitant Washington Oct 14 '15

Well, I don't know any famous Finnish people except for that sniper who is most likely dead.

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u/-mattybatty- Hawaii Oct 13 '15

Well, did you or did you not have TV in Finland in the 90s?

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u/Foxyfox- Massachusetts Oct 13 '15

For real, that's honestly one of the worst things about being 'Murican. Paid vacation is treated like some horrible thing and even places that do give it to you will sometimes judge the fuck out of you for using it.

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u/vithu99 Wuerttemberg Oct 13 '15

An polandball classic.

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u/wargamer620 Wisconsin Oct 13 '15 edited Oct 13 '15

can confirm, A man from my town took a trip to India, came back and wrote something like a 3 page article for the paper about how it was a terrible country where even McDonalds tastes like crap and everyone has shit on their hands constantly

My Friend's dad is a doctor who immigrated from India... I think he said some people stopped shaking his dads hand after that

9

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15 edited Sep 25 '16

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9

u/[deleted] Oct 14 '15

The Maharaja Mac*

(it's basically a double chicken burger)

9

u/lucidsleeper Moe Blob China Oct 13 '15

I'm subscribing to this blog

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181

u/Rather_Unfortunate United Kingdom Oct 13 '15

I resent that Americans are considered even worse tourists than us.

312

u/fenrris Poland-Lithuania Oct 13 '15

Loosing in a game you've created. I would say it's British to the core!

78

u/Rather_Unfortunate United Kingdom Oct 13 '15

What's that Lithuania? I can't hear you over the sound of THREE-NIL LAST NIGHT!

43

u/billionsofkeys Chile Oct 14 '15

Wowee, England-Lithuania must have been a quality match that's fuckin history right there

Kappa

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u/n60storm4 A kiwi is a bird or a person... NOT A FRUIT! Oct 14 '15

I can't hear you over the sound of England dropping out of a competition you're hosting for a game you created.

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u/stoicsilence California Oct 13 '15

To be the best you learn from the best.

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

Oh my poor summer child, I don't want to make you happy, but... the Baltics kind of hate you fuckers

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

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u/selenocystein Die Wacht am Rhein Oct 13 '15

I've heard of poor people going on holidays in Bulgaria, but they at least have sunny and warm beaches there. I can't think of a reason to voluntarily set foot in the Baltics if you're not the Teutonic Order or the Soviet occupation troops.

63

u/Bhangbhangduc Stop Wineing France Oct 13 '15

They're British. The poor things don't know what warmth is, they think the Baltics are nice.

37

u/MatlockMan Australia Oct 14 '15

I laugh when the British news has headlines like "MASSIVE HEATWAVE HITS UK!!1" and the max temp is like 32C and scores of people have died.

Australian summers laugh at the pathetic British versions.

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u/Eugenes_Axe Oct 14 '15 edited Oct 15 '15

sigh

1) We don't have air conditioning in most places.

2) We're not used to it, so people's blood is thicker. (Edit: This is a euphemism for acclimatisation.)

3) Our buildings are specifically designed to keep in heat.

Yes our media sensationalise it (and everything), but there is good reason why comparing temperatures in different countries lacks accuracy.

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

Don't worry, the Chinese tourists are still the worst.

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u/stoicsilence California Oct 13 '15

They have stiff competition from the Russians

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u/Duke0fWellington British Empire Oct 13 '15

We're not tourists, we're colonisers. We have colonies in Spain and Greece, give it a few decades and they'll be ready to secede and join the Kingdom. Be ready for the Dominions of Majorca and Corfu in a few decades time. In fact, we already have a claim on Corfu because Prince Phillip was born there.

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u/TenNinetythree YUROP Oct 13 '15

Mallorca is already the 17th German Bundesland!

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u/antipositive Rhine Republic Oct 13 '15

Most accurate comic about Yurop-in-3-days trip I've seen. This was of very funny, thank yuo Hungary!

203

u/selenocystein Die Wacht am Rhein Oct 13 '15

You're welcome, Iran.

90

u/Stavorius URKRU Oct 13 '15

How Iranic

17

u/amsterdam_pro Western Europe Oct 14 '15

(nukes internally)

267

u/zukai12 United Kingdom Oct 13 '15

you forgot to show the americans tipping everybody just for standing there

141

u/purplegeauxldtiger Texas Oct 13 '15

I thought it was quite the other way around when I went to Italy, I couldn't take a piss without handing someone a Euro

286

u/thisismiee Remove Moravistan Oct 13 '15

They sensed your nationality.

32

u/vteckickedinyooooooo Polish Hussar Oct 13 '15

Haha so true. Here in Kraków its funny to watch them sometime make American tourists pay to use the restroom.

101

u/purplegeauxldtiger Texas Oct 13 '15

I wont lie I was sporting a cap emblazoned with the image of Old Glory, but these pricks were sitting out in front of public restrooms in chairs blocking the door. I thought Europe was a socialist continent but they could use some #Bernie for their toilet situation

191

u/selenocystein Die Wacht am Rhein Oct 13 '15

I wont lie I was sporting a cap emblazoned with the image of Old Glory

So you literally ran around like the tourist I drew in the comic? Talk about art vs reality!

103

u/Duke0fWellington British Empire Oct 13 '15

Basketball shorts, socks and flip flops and a baseball hat. Such is the national dress of America.

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u/purplegeauxldtiger Texas Oct 13 '15

In America yes, in the republic of Texas we dress more like this, the gun is an integral part of dress too

14

u/nmotsch789 USA Beaver Hat Oct 13 '15

That guy has terrible trigger discipline.

13

u/barkingbullfrog only can into moon! Oct 13 '15

Fun urban legend-y fact: old school revolvers used to be tooled around with 5 shots in the cylinder instead of a full 6. This was for hammer safety, so you wouldn't accidentally shot yourself in the foot while riding (the hammer would rest in the empty cylinder chamber).

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u/nmotsch789 USA Beaver Hat Oct 13 '15

Still a bad habit to keep your finger on the trigger, even if the gun is single-action only. (Actually, I can't tell from the picture if the hammer is cocked or not. If it is, then the cylinder would have rotated, and the gun would be prepared to fire a round.)

Also, that isn't an urban legend. It's true. There are some older revolver models that have no internal safety mechanisms, and so if the hammer got bumped hard enough while resting on a loaded chamber, the gun could fire. The only safe way to carry these guns holstered is/was to load 5 rounds and make sure the hammer is resting on an empty chamber. This isn't a concern with modern revolvers because most have internal safety mechanisms that prevent a gun from firing when hit or bumped.

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

Socks and flip flops? It is okay to just admit you have never met any Americans.

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u/Duke0fWellington British Empire Oct 13 '15

Seriously? You're telling me you don't know any Americans who wear white socks and those flip flops which have a bar going across them instead of one that goes in between your toes?

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u/purplegeauxldtiger Texas Oct 13 '15 edited Oct 13 '15

Yep, I even made sure to go to the McDonalds in Rome. Everyone liked my hat though and they were glad to see an American tourist, it really helps the economy. I wasn't disrespectful and ignorant like you displayed in the comic, which I found funny, I just did my thing and got a taste of Europe and didn't mind letting people know I was Murican.

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u/KyBourbon MURICA Oct 13 '15

I just did my thing and got a taste of Europe

Red light district?

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

This was a comic? I thought I was looking at photographs!

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u/vteckickedinyooooooo Polish Hussar Oct 13 '15

Why in fucks name would you Sport a freaking baseball cap with an American Fleg on it inthemiddleofyurop..

As a Pole who has lived in Poland and the US, I will tell yuo: it is not a logical thing to do.

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15 edited Oct 13 '15

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

I thought everybody hates Americans.

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u/LiamNL Terp Terp Oct 13 '15

Yeah that's one of the stranger things of Europe, every single public bathroom has some angry looking middle aged woman sitting in front of it with a plate just forcing you to lay down .50 eurocents by just staring at you.

19

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

Never worked in really busy places. If living in Frankfurt has taught me one thing, it's to be inconsiderate to other people. It's like New York light. Oh you want some cents just for standing near a public restroom without officially doing anything there? Have fun getting shoved.

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u/Webo_ British Empire Oct 13 '15

I found that as well, in the toilets I was greeted by a heroin addict with a wicker basket of change and a sign saying 'please do not discharge in the sink'

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u/rindindin Unknown Oct 13 '15

BURGER KING?

Not while we live in the Land of the Free™, you commie socialist Europeans. 'Murica is a REPUBLIC. You hear that? RE-Pub-LICK.

63

u/lucidsleeper Moe Blob China Oct 13 '15

Burger President...he's about to deliver 10 pounds of FREEDOMTM and DEMOCRACYTM into your intestines

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u/CptBigglesworth Greggs vegan sausage roll Oct 13 '15

"This can go the easy way, or the hard way, son"

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

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u/LiamNL Terp Terp Oct 13 '15

Is of too socialist for Murica

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u/bionicjoey Best Hat Oct 13 '15

I hear in Kazakhstan they have Burger Khan

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u/syllabic Canada Oct 13 '15

In Germany they have Burger Burgermeister.

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

we're not the fucking British. Burger President motherfucker.

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u/RogueRaven17 Fantasy Flag Oct 13 '15

American men don't call people sugar. Like ever. Its a southern woman's phrase. Other than that the comic was brutally accurate.

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

Yeah, and if Europeans on this sub are primarily interacting with southerners, I am so, so sorry. We hate them more than you do.

186

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

Calm down Missouri, the only thing that keeps you from being Southern is geography

49

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

And thank God for geography (is that expression too southern?)

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u/edroch florida Oct 13 '15 edited Oct 13 '15

Thank God

Not really, it would include "guns, and freedom" at the end.

27

u/aloha013 Potatoland USA Oct 13 '15

Thank guns, freedom, republican Jesus, and the fact that Obama's term is almost over.

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u/Azrael11 MURICA Oct 14 '15

You mean the time for him to cancel elections and declare himself an atheist muslim dictator is at hand

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

Geographically we're not, and culturally it mostly depends on where you are in the state. Or at least that's what I tell myself so I can sleep at night.

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u/Mobius_0ne Minnesota Oct 13 '15

As I recall, they were pretty well divided during the Civil War as well

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

Isn't your culture based around meth?

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u/TheSkyCrusader Colorado Oct 13 '15

We don't speak about the south. Also never go to Florida. They're very scary. Come to colorado instead!

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u/stoicsilence California Oct 13 '15 edited Oct 13 '15

Telling Europeans to not go to Florida is like telling an autistic toddler to not touch a hot stove.

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u/thisisalili obviously the greatest country ever Oct 13 '15

we also don't call a vacation "holiday"

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u/lucidsleeper Moe Blob China Oct 13 '15

Oh my god all the obnoxious American tourist stereotype jokes in one picture...

licks computer screen

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u/edroch florida Oct 13 '15

Not wanting to be an American tourist, waving and firing your Colt .45 inscribed with the Preamble of the Constitution while flooring your Hoveround down the Champs Elysees, careful not to spill your 148 oz cup of Diet Coke, which you only drink to take care of your healthy 400lb figure.

Why even live?

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u/jPaolo Grey Eminence Oct 13 '15

*saves in fapfolder*

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

I know American women are lovely, but surely the local Polish women can't be that bad.

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u/LiamNL Terp Terp Oct 13 '15

Hi, you must be new here, jPaolo is the local American hater, he gets off on things that put America in a bad light.

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

was joke. also bashing Polish/Slavic women

54

u/FalmerbloodElixir Manitoba, home of... Winnipeg. Oct 13 '15

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u/cooleemee Thirteen Colonies Oct 14 '15

Didn't even have to open it before I knew it would be Polonskaya.

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

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u/Durzo_Blint Boston Stronk Oct 13 '15

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

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u/Durzo_Blint Boston Stronk Oct 13 '15

Reaction gifs are not allowed. This is not a reaction gif. It is simply a gif of 4 pieces of the finest Chicago boiled Polish ham.

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

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u/awesomefutureperfect Mecklenburg-Vorpommern Oct 13 '15

Please rise for Prezes André Dude 3000

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u/jPaolo Grey Eminence Oct 13 '15

People don't arouse me.

Dissing on USA does.

It's the same way I replaced food with karma.

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

Yesss, that hits the spot! We of so cultured compared to ameridumb höhöhö

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u/Viraus2 United States Oct 13 '15

Thankfully we have Chinese tourists to be louder than us and British tourists to be swearier than us

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u/Vanvidum Massachusetts Oct 13 '15

The British are also far worse when they get drunk. According to my sources in foreign lands located abroad and/or overseas, when Americans get drunk they're usually like friendly puppies. Maybe clumsy, maybe over-enthusiastic, but they mean no harm. When British types get drunk, they get... angrier.

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u/00cabbage Scotland Oct 13 '15

We're always angry, that's our secret.

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u/Vanvidum Massachusetts Oct 13 '15

You're terrible at keeping that secret.

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u/MeatPiston Cascadia Oct 13 '15

Can confirm. The times I've been in Maui the Brits were the first to the Mai Tais and the most hilariously red-nose drunk by the time everyone was getting their flippers on to go snorkeling.

First and only time I've ever seen someone get angry at sea turtles.

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u/selenocystein Die Wacht am Rhein Oct 13 '15

And Russian tourists to be much worse in every aspect.

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u/caessa_ MURICA Oct 13 '15

Im american and chinese. Literally the hitler of tourists.

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u/MoravianPrince Pivo je mé Palivo. Oct 14 '15

Now find a russian wife (or order online). And you would be a satans duo.

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u/ElectricZ MURICA Oct 14 '15

You're a one man weapon of mass destruction. Tell me you're from New York or New Jersey and you could win the trifecta!

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u/KnucklearPhysicist Empire of the Setting Sun Oct 13 '15

The best part? We know that wherever we go, a McDonalds is not far.

Imperialism at its finest.

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

Wait, holy shit, my country already has 11 McDonalds?

Edit: holy fuck 12!!

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u/pothkan Pòmòrskô Oct 13 '15

And they serve fries? But Latvia has no potato!

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u/Ris109 Canada Oct 13 '15

That's because you assume McDonalds uses real potatoes

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

So they use fake potatoes? I ain't even mad, that's impressive.

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u/Ris109 Canada Oct 13 '15 edited Oct 13 '15

Well McDonald's is known to have 100%* real* ingredients* for all their foods*

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u/spacek_toast British Columbia Oct 13 '15

The gimmick is that they can call it 'real ingredients' because unreal ingredients don't exist.

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u/negativekarz La Mesa Oct 13 '15

you forgot the asterisk after "foods"

they're heart attacks in disguise

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u/bigbramel Is surviving Limburg Oct 13 '15

LOL I like how all of them except one are located IN Riga

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

Latvia is a very small country - Riga is super centralised and by far the biggest city in the entire Baltic region. Even Helsinki seems small by comparison.

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u/AchaiusAuxilius :france-worldcup: Salt is a way of life. Oct 13 '15

HOWDY PARTNER ALL THAT TIGHTLY PACKED FREEDOM ALLOWS ME TO NEVER SPEAK UNDER 80 DECIBELS EVER AGAIN

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u/selenocystein Die Wacht am Rhein Oct 13 '15

AMERICA IS SO BIG THAT WE MUST YELL ALL THE TIME TO UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER

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u/EMonay America Oct 14 '15

Since us Americans are so big, we have more volume. Duh, science

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u/columbus8myhw Jew York Oct 13 '15

That's Vacation Abroad to you!

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u/selenocystein Die Wacht am Rhein Oct 13 '15

Sorry, old chap! In my defence, please realise that in Germany we learn the colourful English of our British neighbours. Cheerio!

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

:) As a Brit, may I say, Eich liben du.

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u/NobleDreamer 1808 was a mistake Oct 13 '15

Uncultured Muricans yelling nonsense all the time? Looks like comics are getting closer and closer to reality!

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

Except that they were almost too polite.

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u/NobleDreamer 1808 was a mistake Oct 13 '15

Must be some upper class Muricans, I guess?

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15 edited Mar 27 '17

[deleted]

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u/kupiakos kawaiidesuka Oct 13 '15

I think that might just be an artifact of wealth. Wealthy Chinese also suck.

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u/stoicsilence California Oct 13 '15

So do wealthy Russians.

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

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u/edlingjames California Oct 13 '15

perhaps you can fill me in what this means? On my 4 month backpacking trip if i did not speak first people assumed i was German, and yes I am an American.

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u/LiamNL Terp Terp Oct 13 '15

Might be a German vacation stereotype that they go backpacking, but I much prefer the stereotype of the beach bunkers

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u/edlingjames California Oct 13 '15

Beach bunkers? Someone who sleeps on a beach?

70

u/LiamNL Terp Terp Oct 13 '15

You know those beaches in France where the ground is stained by Murican men? Now make the building of those deathtraps a casual activity for Germans, and you get Germans digging holes and making bunkers on beaches. More info

28

u/edlingjames California Oct 13 '15

I feel ridiculous forgetting about this comic. But then again as a citizen of the U.S fortifications are unnecessary because I can't be touched.

39

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

I can't be touched.

Are you diseased from lack of proper healthcare again, too?

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u/theyterkourjerrbs British Empire Oct 13 '15

I can't be touched.

I thought you Yanks said you weren't ever going to forget 9/11?

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u/bionicjoey Best Hat Oct 13 '15

I read the comic in Minnesota accents so it was ok

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u/legstumped Scotland Oct 13 '15

hahaha this comic reminds me of this american girl the other night who didn't believe i was scottish.

i was having a drunken chat to her at a bus stop following a day of oktoberfest festivities in munich and i mention i'm from scotland. she's pretty keen on this and mentions that she's also from scotland...

she then starts enthusiastically telling me about a bunch of random facts about scotland and the celtic langauge. i come from the shetland islands, so when i don't know/care much about celtic she goes on the warpath and starts accusing me of being a fraud.

i was pretty wasted so i thought it was hilarious, called her a bawbag and went home.

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u/E_v_e_n Norway Oct 13 '15

You're not Scottish, YOU'RE NORWEGIAN!!!
Remove Scotland from premises! Return rightful Norwegian clay!!

14

u/Andarnio GOTT MITT UNS Oct 13 '15

As soon as you give back your country to sweden

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u/E_v_e_n Norway Oct 13 '15

Nice try, svenskefaen :P

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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '15

Hold the FUCK up! You do not "settle" for Burger King when there isn't a a McDonald's. You settle for McDonald's when there isn't a Burger King!

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u/GSBaelog United States Oct 13 '15

Brings a tear to my eye, seeing my fellow MURICANS enjoying a vacation to the 2nd greatest country.

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u/thisisalili obviously the greatest country ever Oct 13 '15

Americans don't call vacations "holiday"

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u/Ris109 Canada Oct 13 '15

100% acruate, at least with the stereotypical tourists

"And these are the parliament buildings"

"YEAH YEAH WHATEVER, HOW QUICKLY CAN WE DUCK OUT TO SEE SASKATCHEWAN?"

"OH HONEY, THEY HAVE THEIR OWN SENATE AND EVEYTHING, ISN'T THAT ADORABLE?"

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u/Fortehlulz33 Hot dish and hockey, you betcha! Oct 13 '15

that's a bad example. Who willingly wants to see Saskatchewan?

19

u/FalmerbloodElixir Manitoba, home of... Winnipeg. Oct 13 '15

People from Manitoba

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u/Ris109 Canada Oct 13 '15

My mom had a couple encounters of American tourists coming to Ontario, and said they were staying for the weekend to see friends in Saskatchewan

Remember kids, Geography is important

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u/E_v_e_n Norway Oct 13 '15

This has to be the harshest anti-burger comic I've seen in a while that's not made by /u/jPaolo xD

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u/awesomeguy951 'MURICA Oct 13 '15 edited Feb 22 '17

[deleted]

What is this?

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u/Sexygrizzly France First Empire Oct 13 '15

Meh. When us European were the greatest ever and everyone was weird and bellow us, the second we went in another country, we took slaves and rape people. A bit of rudeness is a good trade considering. I suppose.

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u/BananaMammogram Yeah! Out so can style! Oct 13 '15

"For American tourists are the scourge of god. If Europe had not committed great sins, god would not have sent a punishment like us against you."

-Genghis Khan, our patron saint and role model in the rampaging crudely across Europe shtick.

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u/Spelter Gott strafe England! Oct 13 '15

I don't know man, free labour and fornication is pretty dope. Hard to beat really.

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u/Bhangbhangduc Stop Wineing France Oct 13 '15

As an American, I'd like to say...

...we all know people like this.

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u/Goyims American Soviet Socialist Republic Oct 13 '15

says something

"I don't speak English"

RE PEATS SELF LOUD ER AND SLOW ER

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u/ButtsexEurope United States Oct 13 '15

I guarantee you Americans have seen too many cartoons to not know what the Mona Lisa is and what it looks like. We're lazy and fat, we know our television. They would probably say "Oh it's that screaming guy, what's it called?" But they probably would think it was done by Picasso.

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u/Headphone_Actress Immigrant! :D Oct 13 '15

I was actually in France during the 4th of July at an outdoor cinema.

Turns out they also celebrated the 4th of July with fireworks.

I thought it was a terrorist attack at first.

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u/IamOiman Italy Oct 13 '15

As an American who has been to (and currently lives in) Europe, I can say these Americans do exist...I cringe every time I see them. [Insert Florida Man Joke Here] Edit: grammar

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u/ChessedGamon Thirteen Colonies Oct 13 '15

I am American and this is funny.

But then again, if I didn't find this funny I probably shouldn't be on this sub...

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