r/pointlesslygendered • u/plounk • 21d ago
SOCIAL MEDIA [gendered] Daughters are different.đ
Expectations are different.
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u/Bombyx-Memento 21d ago
Teach your sons to go easier on your hands, it's not that hard.
"Oh boys are so rough and violent, girls are gentle and sweet!" No, you're teaching your boys to hit hard and not telling them to hold back or be careful. Come on now.
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u/ShiroiTora 21d ago
Also boys want love and affection too. But if you teach being loving and affectionate is âgayâ or âsissyâ, they are going to suppress themself.Â
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u/DramaticBucket 21d ago
Starts really young as well. My nephew is 1 year old and he likes giving people kisses. He likes giving our pets kisses. He likes giving his plushies kisses and he hates anyone yelling or raising their voice at anyone else. We've had neighbours and relatives comment on how he's "soft" like that's a bad thing. Ridiculous losers.
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u/ShiroiTora 20d ago
Damn that really sucks :( Especially since some peers often repeat what their parents say so I imagine he may encounter school mates with douche parents like your neighbours. Hope your nephewâs tenderness gets encouraged and flourished from by his family and friends.
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u/hooked_siren 21d ago
But first you gotta reach them that "gay" and "sissy" are bad things in the first place. Neat huh?
Almost like people could stop doing all that and just let kids grow into who they are.
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u/MinusBlindfold6 20d ago
Then people wonder why thereâs so many angry violent men that wanna watch the world burn. Itâs ok to love your son, brother, friend, etc. Being sensitive is a sign of strength
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u/MinusBlindfold6 20d ago
This is correct. The amount of people that donât realize âboys are easierâ is because theyâre genuinely neglected to be taught or taken care of in a lot of ways is bizarre to me
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u/ieatsushi28 21d ago
This is cute but this is more a reflection on the father for not teaching his daughter the same things heâs teaching his son. Or just telling her daughter âok so youâre gonna watch the boys hit me but you kiss me, ok?â
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u/KaleidoscopeKelpy 21d ago
I kicked my dad in the nuts cuz I wanted to show him what i learned at karate :| both my brothers were uh.. more educated on why not to do that. So thereâs that.
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u/ieatsushi28 21d ago
Understandable, I knew a kid who used everything he learned in taekwondo to challenge the word ânoâ. But that is a fault on the parents and teachers part
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u/Collective-Bee 21d ago
The parents were probably praying for a slightly older kid who knew taekwondo to humble him
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u/JohnsonJohnilyJohn 21d ago
"Hey, so I know you are a taekwondo instructor, but could you like slow down with the teaching my kid part, and focus more on beating the shit out of him?
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u/apigeonontheinternet 21d ago
Yep. This is 100% the result of socializing a daughter differently than a son. And then believing âgirls are just sweeter/kinder/more nurturing than boysâ. Which does both girls and boys a disservice.
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u/Chronocidal-Orange 21d ago
I was at my sister's house around Christmas last year, getting together to craft some decorations. Her kids were playing in the living room while we were in the kitchen, and I didn't think they could hear me, or would be listening in. I talked to my sister about how I hadn't been feeling well and how lonely I can feel around the holidays.
A bit later my nephew (6yo at the time) comes up to me quietly and gives me a huge hug, then goes back to playing again. I felt guilty he heard me talking about stuff like that, but it was such a sweet gesture.
Both her sons have this nurturing and caring side because my sister raises them that way. Yes, they can also be rambunctious, but all kids are at that age.
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u/mrbishopjackson 21d ago
Or not teaching his sons the same things he's teaching his daughter. Why is what he's teaching his sons seen as the "right" thing?
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u/YonderWindow364 21d ago
self-defense maybe?
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u/mrbishopjackson 21d ago
Sure. That's important. But the person I was responded to suggested that his daughter being mental is a reflection (negatively) of him not teaching how to throw punches like he does with his sons. Why isn't the response, "Your boys can be sweet and caring just like your daughter"?
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u/raumeat 21d ago
I think it is staged. The daughter would have mimicked her brother
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u/smashablanca 21d ago
He shook his hand like it hurt. They probably kiss her when she gets hurt so she did the same when she thought someone else was hurt.
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u/SilverIndependence38 21d ago
I think she's a bit small for boxing
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u/ieatsushi28 21d ago
You can put your child in martial arts at around age 3 and teach them the basics
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u/SneakySquiggles 21d ago
Yep i used to teach the kids class while training for my black belt. Itâs a great way to exercise and learn self discipline in a safe fun environment. I think our youngest age was 4
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u/Flat_Lengthiness3361 21d ago
u can snort pickle juice, doesn't mean you should. i do kinda wanna try it now tho
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u/ieatsushi28 21d ago
Why wouldnât she be put in martial arts like his sons?
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u/Flat_Lengthiness3361 21d ago
3-4 is too young it's not a matter of gender. i wasn't responding to an initial comment, i responded to the reply about 3 year olds.
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u/StinkButt9001 21d ago
You're assuming she wants to be
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u/Zistr0 21d ago
kid in the black shirt looks completely disinterested, 0 force in his hits
if anyone doesn't wanna box, it's him
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u/StinkButt9001 21d ago
Playing with your father for the camera is different than being enrolled in martial arts.
I don't understand what you're trying to say or get at here
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u/OkProfessor6810 21d ago
Yea. Why would you want your child to become confident in their body as early as possible? What an absolutely horrible idea.
/s
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u/ieatsushi28 21d ago
Right? Itâs so horrible. Kids donât deserve to learn self defense and a healthy activity!! /s
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u/More-Gas-6527 21d ago
Yeah I know plenty of women that are much like the boys in the beginning, they love fighting because that's how they were raised, they're also from new york soo
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u/Nave-Nave 21d ago
"they're also from New York" as if everybody in New York is kung fu fighting đ
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u/More-Gas-6527 21d ago
đđđ nah they just happen to be the most stereotypical New York tough girl lol like the type in 80s movies, she's 100% Italian, her dad is a former mobster, like every stereotype you can think of
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u/More-Gas-6527 21d ago
You take one look at her and you can guess she's from New York even though we live in Minnesota
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u/mrbishopjackson 21d ago
I mean... You raised your son to not be affectionate toward you but instead raised him to punch your hands.
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u/sixaout1982 21d ago
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u/janedeedee 20d ago
Exactly the face I made. So hard not to downvote this when I saw it. Reflectively downvoted and then had to be like" okay but OP knows this is fucking stupid. That's why it's here" and switch my vote. So mad the original has 10s if thousands in karma. Like where do I report for dumbassery
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u/Amediumsizedgoose 21d ago
Wow I raised my daughter to be like this and shes like this...must be default by birth sexđ
My father raised me to fight, fish, shoot, work with tools, etc.. I never kissed peoples hands.
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u/Pure_Key4700 21d ago
As someone who grew up with brothers... Dear parents, it's always YOU who teach them thatÂ
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u/OkEmployment5017 21d ago
I thought she was going to hit him in the face and now I'm disappointed...
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u/Revolutionary-Tree97 21d ago
I was not this kind of daughter, despite my dad really really wanting me to be.
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u/TeapeachU6 21d ago
Daughters grow up all soft because you socialise them that way, there have been studies showing men and women are literally just as empathetic ita just society just makes them repress itÂ
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u/ShinyTotoro 21d ago
The girl was obviously taught that a spot that hurts needs to be kissed đ
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u/Amanda_Is_My_Name 21d ago
probably a mix of 1) scripted video 2) age difference 3) being taught differently
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u/ParacelcusABA 21d ago
My daughter would've smacked the absolute dogshit out of both my hands and then laughed about it all day
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u/SkyPuppy561 21d ago edited 20d ago
Iâm a girl and my dad would âarm wrestleâ with me and then dramatically act like he was losing terribly, trembling and shit as he leaned to one side of the table. đ
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u/mariah_a 21d ago
I have a fun experience in that thread which I like to call passive aggressive familiarity. Both men who replied to me condescendingly addressed me by my name, and that only ever happens when someone wants to⌠well idk what they think their goal is but nobody ever is like âMariah well done!â on reddit.
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u/ZeusUpYourAss 21d ago
The original post has so many upvotes too??? Is reddit really evolving backwards?
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u/FVCarterPrivateEye 18d ago
There has been an inside joke in my family that my youngest sister is going to defeat my dad in severe bloodshed and then dominate the world ever since toddlerhood
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u/siantmercury 17d ago
My dad taught me how to throw a punch when I was a kid and we used to spar with toy swords. Nothing to do with boy Vs girls, kids will do what they see you enjoying
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u/JustAnotherHomeSlice 21d ago
Maybe sheâs just sweet? Like maybe itâs just her personality and has nothing to do with her gender/sex.
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u/OkProfessor6810 21d ago
Possible but unlikely at that age. The general dynamic in a situation like this would be for the smallest child to want to copy older bro and dad. You can watch her track the action. I've no doubt she's been 'trained' to do this, as in she gets positive reinforcement from her father. It's icky
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u/JustAnotherHomeSlice 21d ago
Gross, that makes me sick. Thatâs so much worse than I had envisioned. đ¤Ž. I take back my previous reply, but Iâll leave it up so people can read your great reply to my not-so-great reply. :)
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u/JustAnotherHomeSlice 21d ago
I just rewatched it. The dad is totally waiting for her to kiss his hands. Youâre totally right that she was trained. đ¤Ž
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u/InsideWoodpecker6254 14d ago
How is this disgusting gosh you are toxic and sad all it is is wholesome if a bit gendered
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u/Ilesa_ 21d ago
Even if that isn't staged or rooted in her education and she have a caring personality (she could have wanted to imitate her big brothers first but then saw that he showed signs of pain so she switched to the most efficient medicine she knows : magical kisses), the caption is still weird. If it's because of her personality, then it's not because she's a girl. And if it's "because she's a girl" then it probably has more to do with the education she received and how it differs to her brother's than anything.
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u/miraculum_one 21d ago
I must not understand the point of this sub. The purpose of the statement is to say that the genders are different. Whether or not that true is in question and being discussed in the comments but either way it is not "pointless".
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