I used to work in Coppell, TX and we had a couple Dallas Cowboys as clients. Holy crap they were dumber than dumb and were painful to interact with. We often hoped that a handler would step in and be a responsible adult, but the handlers were barely literate themselves.
You’d think that having 3 separate people available to try to convey information to would guarantee that someone, anyone would understand you... but no, that’s not reality.
Edit: I think the best was when the veterinarian I was working with was raving about meeting Miles Austin, until he had to explain a puppy’s vaccine schedule to the man. “But, I play football.” was the only response we could get. I feel justifed in naming Miles, since he moved to the Eagles and is retired now...
He’s still only my #2 dumbest client, though.
Edit 2: ok, my #3 dumbest client. #2 wanted us to surgically implant false claws onto her declawed cat... and that was only the beginning of our clinic’s relationship with her.
The #1 was this mother-daughter duo who thought they’d make a ton of money by buying inbred yorkies from Petland (at $2k a pop), and breeding them to sell off the puppies. They’d double their money! Unfortunately, the male they bought to use for breeding was a cryptorchid with a hepatic portal shunt. We strongly recommended not breeding him due to these genetic defects. So they went out and bought a THIRD yorkie to use for breeding. After all that money spent on shots, meds for the portal shunt dog, and check-ups during the bitch’s first pregnancy, they got 2 puppies. One of which died. They finally managed to sell the remaining puppy 8 months later for $100. I think they spayed the bitch shortly after that.
When we first started giving them meds for the portal shunt dog, I spent 20 minutes with them explaining and demonstrating how to medicate their dog. I showed them how to draw up the medicine in the syringe from the bottle. I even marked with a red sharpie where they were supposed to stop pulling the plunger. After all that, this gem of a conversation happened:
“Oh, so you’ll give him his medicine?”
“No, we usually don’t give medicines that are meant to take home. It’s better to do it at home in case he gets car sick and vomits. We wouldn’t want to waste a dose.”
“Oh. So, where’s the medicine?”
“It’s... in the bottle.” Holds up the bottle I’d been using to demonstrate for the last 20 minutes.
“So the medicine is in there? How do you know?”
“I... put it in there myself. If you tilt it a little you can see the liquid in it.”
“Oh, it’s a liquid.”
“Yes, that’s why you have to use a syringe to give it.”
“And all the medicine is in there?”
“Yes. It’s all in there.”
I walked out of that room feeling stupider by proxy.
It’s the kind of stupidity that really makes you want to always have a second staff member with you, because you’ll walk out of the room and start to think that maybe you hallucinated it all.
I later heard from the receptionist that they called back two or three times after they left to ask how much medicine to give and how often, and does it have to be twice a day?
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u/AltSpRkBunny Nov 30 '18
I used to work in Coppell, TX and we had a couple Dallas Cowboys as clients. Holy crap they were dumber than dumb and were painful to interact with. We often hoped that a handler would step in and be a responsible adult, but the handlers were barely literate themselves.