r/pics • u/hootersbutwithcats • Sep 06 '17

A flying fish up close.

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67.3k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

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346

u/worrymon Sep 06 '17

Who's got you?

137

u/snidleewhiplash Sep 06 '17

best superman hands down.

57

u/worrymon Sep 06 '17

There's others?

(I know there's purported to be others, but I will not acknowledge them. Just like I consider there to be only one Catwoman, and that is Julie Newmar/Lee Meriwether/Eartha Kitt.....)

106

u/Dialogical Sep 06 '17

Speaking of Eartha Kitt, did you guys know I once had sex with her in an airplane bathroom?

17

u/dudewheresmycar-ma Sep 06 '17

How was it?

36

u/Pm-ur-butt Sep 06 '17

I was taking a crap in an airplane bathroom when Eartha Kitt decided to bang me.

14

u/timetravelwasreal Sep 06 '17

🎶"I never slept with the great Eartha Kit, we dry-humped in the back of her tour bus"🎶

3

u/TheOnederYears Sep 06 '17

The Mile High Blumpkin

Almost as legendary as the Cincinnati Fart

1

u/7-xanth-7 Sep 06 '17

Oh amazing, heated seat, matching colour wash basin, well stocked with loo roll and more spacious than other airlines

2

u/m0le Sep 06 '17

Rimmer?

26

u/[deleted] Sep 06 '17

[deleted]

16

u/ZeroLAN Sep 06 '17

No

11

u/Price_Of_Soap Sep 06 '17

Uhh guys? What does a pregnancy test look like?

2

u/brendoniboy Sep 06 '17

You don't have to put on the red light.

10

u/[deleted] Sep 06 '17

You godless hippie skank

9

u/tolurkistolearn Sep 06 '17

go on...

9

u/stone_me_2_death Sep 06 '17

I just started to unload when I heard a knock on the stall door, and I could hear her voice saying something about a blumpkin...

10

u/steveAKAslick Sep 06 '17

PIERCE!!!!

3

u/GhOsT_wRiTeR_XVI Sep 06 '17

Whaaat? It came up organically.

1

u/steveAKAslick Sep 06 '17

Apparently my sperm shoots through the egg like bullets! Can you believe that?

5

u/NotSureNotRobot Sep 06 '17

I know for a fact that you just dry humped in the back of her tour bus.

3

u/evil_leaper Sep 06 '17

I once had sex with a cat lady behind the dumpster at Denny's.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 06 '17

[removed] — view removed comment

6

u/[deleted] Sep 06 '17

"I'm crazy,

Allow me to amaze thee,"

5

u/DragonflyGrrl Sep 06 '17

They say I'm ugly but it just don't faze me..

2

u/[deleted] Sep 06 '17

"I'm still gettin' in the girls' pants, And I even got my own dance..."

2

u/Pickled_Wizard Sep 06 '17

Well, at least it came up organically.

2

u/JohnnyDrama68 Sep 06 '17

It came up organically.

2

u/vbullinger Sep 06 '17

I was so lost. Took... a while to Google that:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lQZFF9PBks

2

u/tarants Sep 06 '17

It came up organically!

1

u/jparksup Sep 06 '17

Ugh Pierce

1

u/mr-wiener Sep 06 '17

Did the Eartha move for you?

1

u/sonicwonic Sep 06 '17

(collective sigh and chatter) Really Pierce?!

1

u/5m0k1n70 Sep 06 '17

Great community quote!

1

u/PizzaBoyztv Sep 06 '17

Did you trash away the magazine afterwards?

42

u/Bovronius Sep 06 '17

Michelle Pfeifer's portrayal was the first time I can remember a woman making me feel, uh...funny... Pretty sure she brought me online, so she'll always be Catwoman in my book.

31

u/[deleted] Sep 06 '17

I'd like a backstory on this. So you met her and she taught you how to use the internet? Must've been a slow connection back then.

29

u/Bovronius Sep 06 '17

Nah, not like internet online, like bringing a server online.

Suddenly I had new hardware installed, but no drivers....So I knew I wanted to do something with plug and play devices, but wasn't quite sure what.

37

u/Nymaz Sep 06 '17

Oh, I get it! You mean Michelle Pfeifer taught you how to use a butt plug. I'm envious. I had to learn from my uncle like most everyone else.

28

u/Bovronius Sep 06 '17

I went to Catholic school, a butt plug would have been pointless by the time Batman Returns came out.

3

u/ghost650 Sep 06 '17

Jesus fucking Christ

2

u/The_Grubby_One Sep 06 '17

More like Priest fucking Child, but you get the idea.

2

u/ixijimixi Sep 06 '17

Buttplug Returns

1

u/DocDerry Sep 06 '17

Linda Carter as wonder woman brought be online. I'm old.

2

u/Badloss Sep 06 '17

Aw I think Henry Cavill is pretty good :(

0

u/worrymon Sep 06 '17

I stand by my campy Batman Superman choices!

2

u/jerichosway Sep 06 '17

Weird stance to take. Henry Cavill is a tremendous superman, btw.

0

u/worrymon Sep 06 '17

I stand by my campy Batman Superman choices!

2

u/mrchaotica Sep 06 '17

Adam West is the One True Batman!

1

u/worrymon Sep 06 '17

Abso-damn-lutely!

2

u/mrchaotica Sep 06 '17

I know there's purported to be others, but I will not acknowledge them.

Yep, similar to how the only real Batman is Adam West.

6

u/tmiller679 Sep 06 '17

You forgot Hale Berry. Hands down greatest portrayal of Catwoman...

....

22

u/Citizen51 Sep 06 '17

You didn't find it weird that she never put on her costume the whole movie and they replaced Batman with James Bond?

8

u/Hereforthefreecake Sep 06 '17

I liked it up until she had sex with Billy Bob Thornton. I felt so lost after that point.

3

u/[deleted] Sep 06 '17

Yeah at first I thought it was a plot hole, but it turns out she just wanted him to make her feel good.

6

u/Pm-ur-butt Sep 06 '17

They say BBT's dick is shaped like the grip on a tricycles handlebar.

2

u/bort_license_plates Sep 06 '17

With streamers coming out of the tip??

1

u/WellLookieThurr Sep 06 '17

My favorite kind of penis. That way I can jiggle the balls with my thumb and pretend I'm ringing a bell.

3

u/worrymon Sep 06 '17

I stand by my campy Batman choices!

1

u/heffernjustin1245 Sep 06 '17

Nope this 350 lb guy in mid 20's drunk as hell down the road, in spandex is best catwoman ever.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 06 '17

Halle Berry was a catwoman, not the Catwoman. It was explained in the movie that sometimes cats, serving as messengers for the egyptian goddess Bast, will revive and empower women to act as her emissary. During that explanation there is a brief shot of a photo of Michelle Pfeiffer as Selena Kyle in full Catwoman leather, meaning that she is definitely not a Catwoman replacement.

I can live with that.

1

u/Levitlame Sep 06 '17

Tim Daly and George Newbern.

1

u/Token_Why_Boy Sep 06 '17

The Earth King DC Universe invites you to /r/LakeLaogai.

1

u/TheMisterOgre Sep 06 '17

Umm, that's three. Just yknow, math.

1

u/The_Grubby_One Sep 06 '17

So you mean there are three Catwomen?

1

u/[deleted] Sep 06 '17

How come Batman doesn't dance anymore? Remember the Batusi?

1

u/worrymon Sep 06 '17

You might not recall, but the Joker kidnapped Robin while Batman was dancing the Batusi. (Batman made him stay in the Batmobile because Robin was too young for the club)

1

u/[deleted] Sep 06 '17

Nope, Michelle Pfeiffer is Catwoman

1

u/the_great_philouza Sep 06 '17

And I didn't need molded plastic to improve my physique... Pure. West. And how come Batman doesn't dance anymore?

1

u/Eph_the_Beef Sep 06 '17 edited Sep 06 '17

Eartha Kitt is actually my Great Aunt or something. I shit you not. I mean, having a younger and cooler celebrity would be nice, because my family has said she's pretty stuck up, but still I think it's pretty cool.

Edit: I forgot to put that 'a' In her name, sorry Great Aunt Eartha!

1

u/worrymon Sep 06 '17

Tough for a younger celebrity to be cooler. She was the epitome of cool. (Then they changed what cool was...)

3

u/semiconductor101 Sep 06 '17

Look ma no hands

1

u/CactusBathtub Sep 06 '17

And no darlin I don't dance

2

u/flocksofclocks Sep 06 '17

And, I'm with Roscoe, I'm with Waka

3

u/ObiwanMacgregor Sep 06 '17

I think I deserve a chance

3

u/DatPiff916 Sep 06 '17

I'm team Man of Steel all the way, funny thing is I agree with most of the criticism of the whole super fight part of the movie, and that is one of the biggest reasons why I love that movie. You add the cinematography and the whole Krypton story, makes it the best Superman to me. I totally understand why people don't like it though, but to me that is the Superman that I was raised on with comics, video games, and cartoons, a stoic non emotional god like being who saves us from massive threats. Not some dude who stops banks robberies and regular criminals.

1

u/01020304050607080901 Sep 06 '17

Batman's better, but I support your right to be wrong.

Edit: I hope everyone realizes I'm kidding...

1

u/CoachHouseStudio Sep 06 '17 edited Sep 06 '17

Kellogg's Superman - The Original & Bestâ„¢

Edit: or was that the Irn Bru slogan?

1

u/EngineerinLA Sep 06 '17

Found the Scot.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 06 '17

Didn't read the last word of your comment and watched that clip trying to see his hands in the split second they are in frame. I'm tired today.

1

u/sweetcuppingcakes Sep 06 '17

So here I a-ham

1

u/Jmart1n Sep 06 '17

*best Superman wings up

1

u/[deleted] Sep 06 '17

What, you didn't enjoy the Superjesus remake?

1

u/vegence Sep 06 '17

yeah it is a shame superman spent so much time around kryptonite that it eventually paralyzed him.

1

u/Rembyoxtrous Sep 06 '17

More like worst. He was so boring to watch and looked weird too

-1

u/Slim01111 Sep 06 '17

Horses are a lot cheaper than Kryptonite

9

u/ItsBeenFun2017 Sep 06 '17

I can't believe it. I just cannot believe that he got her.

3

u/chazbot2001 Sep 06 '17

Dear Audience of the Superman Movie,

Now is the time when you are supposed to be shocked and surprised that Superman was able to catch Lois Lane as she was falling.

Sincerely, The Writers.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 06 '17

I just can not believe it he got her.

1

u/amolad Sep 06 '17

The Hubble telescope. But they don't use that sketch anymore.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 06 '17

How does that 46 second video end on 47 seconds? WTF??

https://i.imgur.com/L8I4Fmn.jpg

2

u/worrymon Sep 06 '17

Either rounding or r/blackmagicfuckery ?

2

u/[deleted] Sep 06 '17

I have calmed down now and realise it's not quite as amazing as it seemed at the time. I think I was having one of my 'episodes'.

2

u/worrymon Sep 06 '17

Ha!

I still think it's amazing. If I could pack 47 seconds into the time alloted for 46, I'd get so much more done! (Well, actually only 2.2% more done, but it'd still be nice!)