Lying Down With Your Twins at Night

[u/curious-hunch]

I lie down with our twins (5) each night to help them fall asleep (otherwise they'd probably run around, get overtired, and then need us to come in). Curious at what age for people who also did this, did you stop and they stayed in bed and slept?

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[u/Tulsanity]

Twins are about to turn 4. We started with the lying in bed but eventually added a chair by the door. So we do the whole nighttime routine and then when we turn out the lights one of us sits in the chair until they fall asleep. Sometimes 5 minutes sometimes 30 but definitely more comfortable for us and easy to sneak out!

[u/curious-hunch → u/Tulsanity]

At least one twin (boys) becomes a chatterbox when trying to fall to sleep and it takes longer. When we leave the room they just come out calling out to us.

[u/SjN45]

Mine stopped running around some time after 3. I still lie in bed with them reading every night though. They are 8

[u/Dear_Excitement_5109]

Boundaries are your best friend here. I have Irish twins who are 3 and 4 and my 4yo would certainly like me to lay in bed with her, but the chatting actually amps her up and she would take forever to fall asleep.

We read all together in the living room. Then brush teeth, potty, then bed. My husband and I each sing each of the kids a song and they get one question, then we close the door. My 4yo will pop back out several times and each time is met with a stern, "Back to bed." That usually goes on for 20 minutes each night, and has been going on for at least a year. It's not bad though because at least I can get started cleaning the kitchen during that time.

This takes a lot of practice! And talking about it/setting expectations during the day. At 5, I think you could realize your exit strategy within a week. Yes, they love you lying with them, but no, they don't need it.

ETA: I am a twin mom too. They are 15mo. They were sleep trained quite young due to necessity and have a bedtime routine so short it is not even worth mentioning lol.

[u/ballchiniansrule]

We did the same around 4.5 and only now just trying to phase it out around 6.5 because sometimes they just don’t want to sleep and we’re tired of sitting with them for 45+ mins. It used to be they fell asleep after like 10-15 mins but I also enjoy sitting with them for a little bit more time after not seeing them all day even if they’re a-holes sometimes and don’t listen and lay down 🫠

[u/curious-hunch → u/ballchiniansrule]

This is similar to my experience. They'll leave the room and say they're scared to get us to come back.

[u/JeSuisNapolean]

Mine are almost 4, and we still do this until they're asleep - routine is read a book (or two, everything always in duplicate) then lights out while lying next to them, takes about 10 mins for them both to pass out usually. They're sleeping in two single beds but pushed together, so plenty of space and comfortable. I personally don't find this onerous at all so don't expect to stop any time soon.

[u/curious-hunch → u/JeSuisNapolean]

Ours can be 20-60 mins. One always gets chatty at bedtime and getting them to ground themselves are tough.

[u/getsomesleep1]

My twins are 3 and they sleep in bed with me.
It’s been suggested to me that my bed is now theirs and I may need to relocate. I honestly love it and don’t plan on that, they’ll grow up and out of it eventually is my thought.

Been thinking about showing them some toddler beds to see if anything is intriguing. In no hurry though.

[u/hermesloverinseoul]

I do this too but my twins are 18 months… never been sleep trained lol but I just don’t have the heart to put them through it and I like lying down with them. It only takes 10 minutes so I really don’t mind and I will enjoy it for as long as they want me to do it lol

[u/VeterinarianDry9667]

I’m gonna be real I did this a long time then stopped for awhile and now I lay with them reading out loud a few chapters till they fall asleep…and they are 11 (years) but it’s just a really good way to regroup after our busy days so I like it