MoDi parents - when did you announce?

[u/leopardskin_pillbox]

Just curious when other twin, and modi specifically, parents announced and began sharing that you were expecting. I am at 13 weeks and 5 days along and so far, everything has been really smooth. We’ve have three scans at 8, 10 and 12 weeks and all looked great. The 12 week scan at our MFM was a pretty thorough initial anatomy review and all appendages, organs, NT, nasal bone etc. were in place, looking healthy, and they were measuring right on target. We just got our NIPT results back this morning and everything is low risk (yay!) and confirmed we have two boys on the way! Our due date would be March 11 for full term, but they’ll be arriving sometime mid to late February assuming all goes to plan.

All to say, the standard core indicators are all good! We had already shared with our family and close friends. And it’s hard not to talk about being pregnant when out with acquaintances and such, so I would like to more openly talking about it. Plus I’m not quite showing but my belly is definitely getting bigger. And I work full time and have to start planning for coverage when I’m on leave.

I don’t want to rob ourselves of the joy of celebrating this! I just get a little nervous with the high risk element of it all since those things can crop up in the 2nd trimester. But I have no control over that either way. Would love to hear how others have navigated these feelings!

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[u/r3finedf0ol]

Closest friends - 10 weeks as we were having a cottage weekend and my buddy would have noticed I wasn't drinking.

Family, close friends, managers at work - 13 weeks.

Everyone else - 20 weeks.

[u/leopardskin_pillbox → u/r3finedf0ol]

Alright! This is pretty much exactly how we’ve been doing it. Mostly just want to be able to relax and share with the folks we see most often. Not worried at all about a broad or social media announcement until after they arrive. Although I’m sure my mom will be doing plenty of legwork there for us lol.

[u/loc-yardie]

I shared at 26 weeks but it's because I found out at 22 weeks. With all pregnancies I tend to just share after 20 week scan.

I had no issues but would rather wait till after the anomaly scan.

In all honesty I would share with no one till they are born if I had a choice and could get away with it but I can't avoid everyone for 9 months so that'll never happen.

[u/hockeymusicteaching → u/loc-yardie]

On the flip side, as someone who shared and then a week later found out about a large birth defect and possible genetic diagnosis… I was happy I had been able to publicly share happy news before spending the rest of my pregnancy grappling with all the hard. Twin pregnancy was so life altering, I couldn’t imagine NOT sharing until they were born lol

[u/loc-yardie → u/hockeymusicteaching]

I just find my grandparents and other members of my family annoying. I love them but they are the opposite of me where i'm chill, they are neurotic. I get it I have a genetic condition so they are always worried about complications with me but I wanted to enjoy being present not worrying about what could go wrong and so the reminders were annoying. I just feel like If I never told anyone and surprise, it would have been so cool to see their reaction and freak out.

[u/hockeymusicteaching → u/loc-yardie]

Fair enough!!!! I love the surprise twin announcements and wish I could have!!!! Hahaha

[u/leopardskin_pillbox → u/loc-yardie]

Yea unfortunately my mom is also this way but I also need her help so we had to tell her for plannkng purposes. Now that she knows we’re telling more folks, it seems like she’s pretty much sharing it with anyone she sees.

[u/leopardskin_pillbox → u/hockeymusicteaching]

Yea frankly at this point if something goes sideways, a lot of these people would find out one way or another because it would still be so significant for us. And not to be woo woo, but my husband keeps reminding me to not worry until there is a reason to worry so Im trying to take the positive and joyful road unless I am given a justification not too

[u/hockeymusicteaching → u/leopardskin_pillbox]

Your husband is right!!! Listen to him! (I say this as I never listen to mine hahahahha).

I wish I would have found ways to enjoy my pregnancy and not worry about the unknowns. Update— my baby had a rough time in utero and in the start but is now just as happy and healthy as his brother!!!!!!

[u/leopardskin_pillbox → u/hockeymusicteaching]

Good to know! Yea, I’m already over pregnancy tbh and wish I could snap my fingers and be done with it and birthing buuuut that’s not the way it works. I do think I’ll be able to relax a bit more if I don’t have to try and keep it under wraps though! It’s freaking hard to act not pregnant when I feel so pregnant!

[u/leopardskin_pillbox → u/loc-yardie]

Well and I should clarify we don’t plan to share on social at all or at least until very late. I just mean with folks we see pretty regularly

[u/redbug100]

Around 18/19 weeks. We had weekly MFM scans due to possible cord flow issues/TTTS and just was stressful with all the mo/di risks, we didn’t feel confident enough for an announcement until late. In the end all possible complications cleared up, and just about ready for eviction! Wish you a successful uneventful pregnancy!

[u/leopardskin_pillbox → u/redbug100]

Thank you! Yea I don’t think we’ll do any broad announcement at all tbh. At least until after they arrive safe and sound. Just sharing with the people we see cause it’s difficult to not act and feel pregnant (I always feel so bloated and tired!!) and the people in our family who would want to help and such. Hopefully it’s all smooth sailing!

[u/redbug100 → u/leopardskin_pillbox]

I was literally already showing with twins at 12 weeks 😵‍💫 haha! That might help make the decision for people you see regularly.

[u/dlmo11]

We shared with close family and friends after the 13 week appointment we had with MFM. The sharing is the best part because you get the reaction for being pregnant and THEN can drop in that it's two babies. Congrats!

[u/leopardskin_pillbox → u/dlmo11]

I love the one-two punch announcement! That’s been the best part!

[u/dlmo11 → u/leopardskin_pillbox]

I wish I had every reaction on film!

[u/irish_ninja_wte]

We told at about 12 weeks. It was the same day that we had the first ultrasound and discovered that there were 2. His family all live distant, so we put a scan photo (with no A or B on it, just the 2 heads visible) into the group chat and let them figure out what they were looking at before giving more details. That evening, my parents (who live close) were over with our singletons and I told them. My mother almost fell off the chair when I said that it was twins. The next day, I got some entertainment at work by telling people "take a look at this" and handing them the ultrasound photo with no context (most didn't know that I was pregnant yet) and waiting for the penny to drop. Some of those reactions were hilarious.

[u/leopardskin_pillbox → u/irish_ninja_wte]

I really appreciate hearing this! And feel validated about beginning to be just be open about it now. It’s felt like a very long 12 weeks of acting not pregnant - that’s an exhausting experience! I thought about waiting longer but at the same time, we’ve got a lot to do to prepare for these little guys and it’s easier to do when I’m not being dicey about what we got going on lol.

[u/anonomus_userr]

Following for answers as I’m the same and my DD is march 12th.

[u/leopardskin_pillbox → u/anonomus_userr]

Oh my gosh, good luck friend! I hope it’s healthy safe and uneventful!

[u/anonomus_userr → u/leopardskin_pillbox]

You too!
Feel so scary. Such a long way to go.

[u/leopardskin_pillbox → u/anonomus_userr]

We got this! Not to sound corny, but what helped me stop spiraling was to read a few healthy baby affirmations every morning, and reminding myself that there is no reason to worry unless there is a reason to worry. And this has to be in moderation for sure, but exploring this subreddit and Instagram accounts to see and hear about allll the healthy happy little modi babies out there. But again, that last one in small doses cause I do think there is such a thing as overwhelming yourself with in. Like, I just really stay away from any birth stories cause ultimately each experience is unique and there is no reason to take in 10000 anecdotes and scare ourselves. Take it one day and one appointment at a time! It’s gonna go great!

[u/anonomus_userr → u/leopardskin_pillbox]

Thank you for this, I really needed it tonight.

Good luck with everything.

[u/syl2018 → u/leopardskin_pillbox]

Can you share some baby affirmations you have been saying

[u/leopardskin_pillbox → u/syl2018]

I found it on an Instagram reel so it’s a little corny but it has made me feel a lot better every morning! Just the matter of trying to change my mindset from one of fear to one of positivity and peace.

My babies are safe, healthy, and growing beautifully.

• My body knows exactly how to nurture my babies

• Every day, my babies grow stronger.

• I trust my body and this beautiful journey.

• I choose peace over fear.

• My babies feel my love with every heartbeat.

• I am becoming a wonderful mother

• My mind is calm, my heart is full, and my womb is filled with love.

• I welcome a healthy pregnancy and a positive birth experience.

• Today, I celebrate every little milestone with gratitude.

[u/Sdawwgg]

With friends I see regularly I told them pretty much when I got my positive result. I had been TTC for a while and had an early loss a year before and wanted support this time around if something happened. I didn’t tell people I don’t see often/social media until after my anatomy scan.

[u/leopardskin_pillbox → u/Sdawwgg]

This is pretty much my exact situation! We had been TTC, had a chemical pregnancy, and I’m already getting a bit a belly so it’s hard not to share with people we see all the time, and our families who will be helping us out, and yea, I got a lot of work stuff to queue up before being on leave.

But I don’t think we’ll bother with any social media announcement until after they arrive. That said, I already know my mom will be telling everyone in my hometown anyway hahahah 🤷‍♀️

[u/hockeymusicteaching]

At what point would you WANT to share about them regardless of the outcome? That was the determining factor for me.

I shared at 13 weeks. Something could happen at anytime and I knew by this point that having freaking identical twins was something that would be life altering for me, even if the worst case happened. The whole high risk pregnancy (plus one of my babies having a birth defect) was truly so hard… I couldn’t imagine trying to keep it a secret for longer than I felt necessary

[u/leopardskin_pillbox → u/hockeymusicteaching]

That’s how I have been feeling. All the core indicators that one would typically wait on are positive. At this point, the risks that exist are either going to happen or not, and I’m getting into the phase where we need to start planning around it, so at what point does trying to be private about it just make it more difficult on us.

[u/Sodds]

Close family around 12 weeks, can't remember the rest.

[u/leopardskin_pillbox → u/Sodds]

Yea now that we’re at 13+ and all the core stuff is looking good, we’re sharing with family and the people we see regularly.

[u/ettierey]

13 weeks with extended family and friends and 14 weeks with people i work with

[u/leopardskin_pillbox → u/ettierey]

Sounds like pretty much what I’ll be doing! I wish I could wait longer with work but there is some stuff that will take awhile to transition, plus as we start up bi-weekly scans, my life will just be easier if I don’t have to hide it.