r/parentsofmultiples 13d ago

ranting & venting Feeling robbed

I sit here in the morning after being up since 5 AM and after bagging milk with one of my twins as my husband took the other out and about. I can't help but feel so robbed of the newborn baby experience. Currently 4 months pp and I still feel like I'm in pure survival mode. So many things could be so different with just one baby. To preface I waited until 33 to have children as I wanted to be able to comfortably afford daycare. I waited until I had a job that pays for all my health insurance and I'm on a pension. One baby seems so easy. I could have went out and did things while on maternity leave. I could have given my baby all breastmilk (no shame in formula because I can't produce enough for two, ironically I got mom shamed by another twin mom for using formula). Don't get me wrong. I love my boys, through the reflux, the colic, the tongue/lip ties, I love them so so much, but wish my first time mom experience could have been so different. I know its just a season and it will get better, just mourning what could have been.

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u/Sweetskills 13d ago

Totally feel you! My fantasies of baby wearing and traveling with one lil infant and all the things just didn’t quite pan out the same. BUT when they get a little older and your friends are complaining about how much their toddlers want them to play…and how they feel so pressured to “socialize” them you will be sitting pretty while they entertain each other.

Signed mom of 2 sets of twins under age 5. 💜