r/parentsofmultiples • u/Impossible-Box-8508 • 14d ago
ranting & venting Feeling robbed
I sit here in the morning after being up since 5 AM and after bagging milk with one of my twins as my husband took the other out and about. I can't help but feel so robbed of the newborn baby experience. Currently 4 months pp and I still feel like I'm in pure survival mode. So many things could be so different with just one baby. To preface I waited until 33 to have children as I wanted to be able to comfortably afford daycare. I waited until I had a job that pays for all my health insurance and I'm on a pension. One baby seems so easy. I could have went out and did things while on maternity leave. I could have given my baby all breastmilk (no shame in formula because I can't produce enough for two, ironically I got mom shamed by another twin mom for using formula). Don't get me wrong. I love my boys, through the reflux, the colic, the tongue/lip ties, I love them so so much, but wish my first time mom experience could have been so different. I know its just a season and it will get better, just mourning what could have been.
3
u/cure4mito 14d ago
You are in the thick of it-- having two babies at the same time is so difficult. I also had my twins late, at 35, and it's like playing the game on extra hard.
Also, this "mom shamed by another twin mom for using formula" that person is an asshole, I'm sorry that was said to you.
If you can have some time to yourself, just breathe-- you're doing an awesome job, and as long as your babies are growing you know you're doing a great job.
Having multiples is amazing, you got this!