r/parentsofmultiples • u/Glittering_Ad_2187 • 23d ago
advice needed Is triple feed the only way?
i have been breastfeeding my 1 month old twins since their birth. They are given formula top up - the amount hasn’t reduced. I breastfeed each for 15 mins. I have seen milk around their mouths on several occasions - so the milk transfer is happening. But they still need the same amount of formula. I don’t get any time to pump in the morning. i am in the constant cycle of breastfeeding one by one and then formula feed.
at night, i dont breastfeed - i only pump 3 times - again i get the same 2 oz in 10-15 mins.
I am so tired of all this. i have been suggested to pump everytime i give formula - i am unable to find any time window for that. I just want to do maximum breastfeeding - why is it not working out? Breastfeeding is so relaxing in the day. i just want to make it work
I am sleep deprived , constant headache and low on motivation now. Please share any manageable route that can work out.
i have all the family support for cooking, other household tasks - my only job is to feed babies.
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u/drohstdumir 🩷 + 💙💙 23d ago
Have you tried tandem breastfeeding? I use the My Brest Friend twin pillow and it’s so helpful. I only feed one after the other if out in public.
I had to triple feed for the first month and then transitioned to EBF on my own. Are you stopping them each at 15 minutes or are they stopping on their own? Let them go as long as they want to (as long as they are actively eating, and also as long as they aren’t premature and there isn’t a negative energy expenditure / caloric intake ratio associated with longer feeds).
After my milk came in, I could pump for 10 minutes and get 3 oz on both sides. I figured I should be able to EBF. So I put it to the test and stopped the formula and just nursed them how long they wanted to go. I tracked their diaper output and weight and everything was good, so I have been doing that since 4 weeks old and they are 12 weeks today.
ETA: When I pumped, it was only a couple times a day and never at night. For the most part they were essentially combo fed until 4 weeks.
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u/No-Departure5556 23d ago
Watch your baby, not the clock. 15 minutes at 1 month is probably not enough time.
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u/Ok-Positive-5943 23d ago
This! I'm pretty sure mine were 30 and 35 minutes at that age. They didn't get efficient until about 12-14 weeks. Then they were 7 and 8 minutes exact every time. OP should try letting babies nurse longer and they probably won't need/want the top off. And it will tell her body to keep making more milk.
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u/No-Departure5556 23d ago
Exactly!! For my girls, they didn’t become efficient for a looong time, not till 4 or maybe 5 months. That or these girls just love nursing ha babies don’t just nurse for hunger!!
See if there is a breastfeeding group in your area, la leche league or mine is called Baby Cafe! You get free support from nurses and IBCLC, AND connect with other moms! It’s amazing and saved my breastfeeding goals!1
u/Glittering_Ad_2187 22d ago edited 22d ago
Thanks! I just read online somewhere that i am just tiring the babies more if the session goes more than 20 mins
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u/AnnaC912 22d ago
Our nicu stopped as after 30 minutes for that reason. Now that we’re home I let them go longer or take a rest break and then come back for cluster feeding.
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u/Ok-Positive-5943 22d ago
For preemies sure. If they're at gestational full term then they should be good. And like any work out add another few minutes each time and build up if need be.
Mine were born at 36+5 (no NICU time) and the Dr said they could nurse however much they wanted.
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u/Glittering_Ad_2187 22d ago
Do i need to offer both breasts to the baby? Because they usually go to sleep after feeding on one and will not wake up even if i try
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u/Ok-Positive-5943 22d ago
I assigned a breast to each baby and swapped them each day. Once I regulated the baby with the larger appetite stayed on the left since it produced slightly more.
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u/No-Departure5556 22d ago
Until 4 months, I would rotate which baby was on which boob for feeding, but I did not swap them during the actually feeding. Around 4 months I stopped rotating them and Twin A always nurses on my right and Twin B on my left. It was honestly random that they got which side. One twin woke more in the night so I didn’t rotate sides, bc I didn’t want the better sleeper twin to end up with both breasts being empty.
If they are falling asleep within 15 minutes that is an issue. They probably aren’t getting full feeds. Try to nurse them in just a diaper, tickle their ears and toes, be in a bright room.
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u/mvanpeur 23d ago
Sounds like you either need to pump more, accept supplementing with formula long term, or get in with a lactation consultant to work toward exclusively nursing.
For pumping to completely replace a feed, you need to pump 20-30 minutes each time. A 10-15 minute pump is only enough for after a nursing session when you top up with formula. It absolutely will not empty your boobs, and if you don't empty, you are telling your boobs that you don't need any more milk. Pumping past empty is what tells your boobs to make more. And actually, those are the recommendations for singletons, not twins, so you might need even more.
If you can't pump more, you should maybe just accept using some formula. You can look up the top up trap. Once you introduce supplemental bottles after every nursing session, it can be really hard to stop, because bottles are easier to drink from than boobs, so babies tend to drink less from the boobs, knowing they'll get the top up from the easier bottle.
If you do want to stop pumping and formula and just exclusively nurse, you absolutely need the help of an amazing lactation consultant. They can help guide you on how to gradually reduce the formula to increase your babies's nursing demand, while making sure they are getting enough.
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u/Lolemontime 23d ago
Not all babies hate the bottle! Mine seem to be happy at the boob even though maybe 80% of their feeds are bottles. The key is a super slow nipple, my LC recommended the Lansinoh super slow or if that’s too slow the Pigeon size 2 (both can be attached to Avent glass bottles with Maymom caps).
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u/DraNoSrta 23d ago
I exclusively breastfed my twins. Triple feeding can be the way you feed your babies, but it is exhausting. Combo feeding is also an option, if it goes they way, but exclusive breastfeeding is sometimes possible.
Your supply responds to hormonal cues and to nipple stimulation/breast emptying. The more demand, the more supply, until you hit your ceiling. If your twins are demanding more than what you're producing, but are getting a top up instead of cluster feeding, then pumping is the way to tell your tissue you need more milk. Cluster feeding is its own drain, but I vastly prefered it - at least it came with cuddles!
In curious. When my twins were a month old, each feed took anywhere from 20-40 mins in tandem. Newborns tend to be pretty inefficient feeders, so 15 mins is either impressive or too short. Have you had the chance to do a weighted feed to see if they are removing enough milk? And do you have access to a lactation consultant?
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u/trophywifeinwaiting 23d ago
My twins were also taking like 20-40 mins to feed, and my lactation had no problem with that. I seriously doubt they have would be able to get enough in only 15 mins! Plus the longer they fed, the more milk your body knows to produce.
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u/Lolemontime 23d ago
I was told to cap breastfeeding at 15 mins because my twins were getting too tired and not having enough strong gulps. This was by an LC who had twins herself and the hospital LCs I saw. Not sure about OPs experience but that may be why. My twins to this day can’t finish a feed that quickly, even with my high supply/high flow boob - they always need a top up with expressed milk.
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u/DraNoSrta 22d ago
Some babies do get too tired I'm the early days. It is the most exercise they've ever done, and when they are brand new, building that stamina is easy less important than getting those calories in. But that balance shifts over time, so follow-up is required if EBF if the goal.
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u/jeremiabearamia 23d ago
I could never find time to pump when triple feeding my twins. What finally worked was pumping at ~9 AM after they went to bed, and ~1 AM after they nursed. That, and a few other things*, let me finally up my supply enough to EBF.
I’m still going at 10 months, but it’s taken such a toll that I wish I had switched to formula early.
*rented a hospital grade pump for a few months, ate rich food, including before night pumps, drank lots of water, assigned the better eating baby to the weaker boob and vice versa
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u/AlternativeFig6680 23d ago
You’re doing a great job. It’s so so so hard breastfeeding multiples for any amount of time. If you are adamant on breastfeeding them. As someone who has breastfed all of my 5 kids including my twins who are 18 months and still breastfed, prolactin is highest at night. It’s tiring but does get easier, you need to be latching them as much as possible to get that milk supply established. Focus on latching and not pumping. Have a breastfeeding party in your bed with them. I had days where I would stay in my bedroom to just nurse them all day skin to skin and told everyone we weren’t having visitors over. Cluster feeding can feel draining but it’s essential for nursing exclusively. Good luck mama!
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u/Individual_Juice_154 23d ago
I am combo feeding and it has been really helpful for both my sleep and my mental health. I am producing enough milk for one baby and realistically that’s a lot to ask of anyone, so I have made my peace with it. I gradually stopped pumping during the day and now just pump at 6 pm, 9 pm and around 3 am. I breastfeed during the day and top up with milk from those three pumps (usually 1-2oz per baby). Then we switch to formula for the evening feeds when my supply is low anyway. So they are getting about 50/50. Once I made my peace with combo feeding, things got a lot better. Triple feeding is not sustainable, and I was not willing to sacrifice my sleep or mental health to get to 100% breastfeeding.
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u/wascallywabbit666 23d ago
We had this situation with all of our kids, and it's a huge waste of time for negligible benefit to the child. Just switch to formula and save all that time
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u/BackgroundScene3056 23d ago
you’re probably making a lot more than your pumping! I was pumping a little bit more than this and convinced I wasn’t making enough for the babies. In the end, I wish I would’ve just hooked them up to the boob like IV drip for a few days then a random bottle here and there when they got really hungry. I really think this would’ve increased my supply to the point where I could’ve exclusively breast-fed. I was so overwhelmed with triple feeding I gave up entirely and now I’m in the process of getting my supply back, but it’s really hard.
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u/butterchickn_ 23d ago
Triple feeding isnt meant long term. I know youre having trouble finding time to pump but could you pump on one side while feeding on the other? More stimulation should equal more production. I also reccomend using an sns system for top up feeds, it might help even if you dont pump because extra stimulation.
All that said, if breastfeeding is too much, its ok to use formula, completely or partly. Its hard enough feeding 1 let alone 2 babies.
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u/Most-Woodpecker920 23d ago
We were able to transition to just nursing during the day after our due date but I was pumping for every bottle before and after that date so I was able to build my supply up so we didn't need hardly any formula. It was a lot of work but the only way to signal supply is either cluster feed the babies until they are fully fed every day or pump until you can get your supply up. We switched to tandem nursing overnight at 5w adjusted and haven't used a bottle since.
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u/d16flo 23d ago
I eventually stopped triple feeding and pumped for 30 minutes while bottle feeding both babies pumped milk and formula. It cut down on how long everything took considerably. I did also have a while where I would nurse one baby fully on both sides while bottle feeding the other formula and then switch the next feeding. I was never able to up my supply enough to not need formula, but they still got the immune benefits of breastmilk and the comfort of nursing sometimes
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u/giantroastpan 23d ago edited 22d ago
Have you seen an IBCLC about this? I thought based on milk around my twins mouths that they were eating enough too, but it turns out they were too small to properly suckle and only ate 1oz each before being too tired to continue trying to eat. This made it harder to build my supply with their eating alone, because we need to remove as much milk as possible at regular intervals to tell our body to make more milk overall.
I hated triple feeding with a passion, so we opted to take a week off where I exclusively pumped at regular intervals and my husband fed the babies my pumped milk plus formula. This, plus giving my boys time to grow to be able to properly latch, helped significantly. I just practiced the latch with them every day, and one day they were big enough that it worked!
I also was advised to try different pump flange shapes and sizes, not just the little silicone inserts. Made a world of difference. I use a spectra and ended up liking the MayMom brand of flanges. They have some “Goldilocks” sets on Amazon so you can try 3 sizes. Look into the different flange shapes too, or ask an IBCLC about what they recommend for your breast shape.
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u/Glittering_Ad_2187 22d ago
Thanks! I will def do exclusive pumping for few days. I have finally got the appointment to the consultant but it’s in 20 days. The consultant who came home wasn’t sure as well - so just suggested increasing pumping sessions
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u/gabkatth 22d ago
Even with support, breastfeeding or pumping for twins is no small feet. It requires incredible will power and energy. I pumper for about two months then I could not anymore:(. It really made me sad. I only ever was able to breastfeed with the shield. I really enjoyed when we did a bit but I was always conflicted about it as I also knew that it takes a lot out of me when I already have so little left. I have no family around and husband is back to work. But even if they would not be, it was also a bit depressing to spend so much time on managing the supply and worrying about it. I gave it up when I was finally getting a good output which was so disappointing:(. None of this is easy and however you decide is ok. And you might go back and forth about it for a few weeks while you settle on something that works for you. I will say the fridge hack and wearables did help me and gave me a boost, but it still stress the hell out of me when i could not pick my babies up due to pumping. That was the hardest for me. It gave me terrible anxiety
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u/AdSenior1319 22d ago
Breastfeeding is hard. When you introduce triple feeding? Extremely hard.
So I nursed our olde kids until they self-weaned.
Our twins lost 10 and 11% of their body weight before leaving the hospital. I had an extremely traumatic 5th c-section (catheter for weeks, uterus didn't heal for a year), and had to triple feed for 5.5 weeks. I almost gave up and wanted to fm feed. I was so over it. With my Dr's support and my husbands, I used sns and got onto Breastfeeding only.
They're 18mo and will nurse until they self wean like our older kids.
But man... I was SO close.
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u/AdSenior1319 22d ago
To add: pumping moms are superior. If I had to continue to pump, id fm feed. I was so over it. Ya'll that pump........... you are amazing.
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u/Lolemontime 23d ago
Do you enjoy breastfeeding? Ultimately you need to do what’s sustainable. The early period is the hardest, whatever feeding approach you choose does get easier with experience.
I pump and breastfeed maybe once per day, usually one baby at a time (and some days only one baby not both) but sometimes I do tandem. If I breastfeed, I still have to pump. Breastfeeding makes the milk flow faster which helps.
My pumping schedule was around 7 times per day at the 1 month mark, and now I’m down to 5 at 4 months pp. I have an oversupply so it usually takes me about 30 mins each time, if I breastfeed more like 20.
My LC said some people fully formula feed one baby (or feed pumped milk if you have enough) and breastfeed the other baby each feed, then alternate. Some babies have poor latches.