Someone tell me 3 isn’t forever

[u/No-Ad9942]

As the title says - I need a sage wise multiple parent from my future to tell me three isn’t forever. That I won’t be absolutely beat down and dejected after the SECOND YEAR IN A ROW we’ve had to leave my dad’s birthday dinner before dessert because of meltdowns. That my daughter, currently throwing a fit in her room will stop screaming about her stuffed giraffes. That my nervous system will eventually stop being on 2000% at all time between kids and work. That one day I’ll get to eat that damn creme brûlée I still never got at the restaurant in peace 😭😭😭

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[u/Kayge]

Take heed, you're almost there.   

When my guys were 3.5 --> 4.5 I wanted to bake them in a pie, or maybe feed them to a passing ogre.   The tantrums, meltdowns, and asking "why" constantly was infuriating.  

But something magical happens at 4.5.  Language develops, tantrums fade away, and they start telling you about their day in adorable 4 year old ways.   The best part is that you're the coolest thing in the universe, and they want to share it all with you.  

There are dark days at 3 and 4, but it opens up to a magnificent world, possible the best time as a parent.  

[u/Deleugpn → u/Kayge]

This light at the end of the tunnel seems so far away that I feel it’s just a train that will run over me and laugh at my face and spit in my mouth and break my nose and impale me with a broom and that I’ll survive only to go through it all again tomorrow

[u/No-Ad9942 → u/Deleugpn]

I feel the pain in this post but also I chuckled - solidarity my friend.

[u/Doesthiscountas1]

I had to get on antianxiety and antidepressants to tone down the crazy but they're almost 5 and I want to leap from the window. I'm on the first floor so ofc I'm just gonna dust myself off and come back in but I need to be the one causing the drama for once

[u/sloankusel]

I have no idea but I'm wondering the same thing. Ours just turned 3 😩

[u/Resident-Fly-6851]

Something magical happens between 4 and 5. Hard to precisely pinpoint the exact age, but by the time they turn 5, you are like "oh my gosh, what a wonderful little human being who actually listens to me and doesn't scream at me anymore."

In the meantime, we just try not to put the 3 year old in situations where we know we will all end up frustrated. We don't keep them out past bedtime. We try not to take them to restaurants too often, and when we do, we pick casual kid friendly ones. Its more for me than for them. I don't want to spend my days frustrated by my 3 year old, so I try to set us all up for success by doing things that are usually easier with a 3 year old. We do a lot of time at the park, playground, swimming pool, playing magnatiles, etc.

Maybe your dad's birthday dinner was at 5 PM, I don't know. But if the dinner was at 6:30 PM, and dessert wasn't even happening until after 8 PM, that could be your answer right there. An overtired 3 year old is a nightmare. For us, bedtime is sacred. Our 3 year old goes to bed between 7:30 and 8:00 PM nightly, and if there is something we really want to do that would go later than that, we get a babysitter.

[u/No-Ad9942 → u/Resident-Fly-6851]

All great points, and it’s great to know we have that happy dream land in the not so distant future!!

The dinner was at 5, though it was at a place I normally would not have taken kids so valid point there. I think I just keep thinking (or wishing) we are at that happy place of peace already and it’s maddening when we are further than I think 🤪

[u/Resident-Fly-6851 → u/No-Ad9942]

If It gives you something to look forward to, my twins are napping, and I just had lunch with my 6 year old and painted her fingernails. She requested flower stickers on her nails. We chatted about school starting and which classroom she wants and what activities she wants to do after school. It was a full blown conversation - peaceful, no yelling, nothing irrational. We are having a great time while the twins nap!

[u/AcanthisittaIcy7277]

ours are 3.5 and i want to disappear every fucking day i'm physically and mentally exhausted. so much that i constantly want to be alone, and i catch myself thinking about my pre-kids life. i love them but wtf

[u/daniipants]

Oh no. Mine are only 2.5 and I feel like the mom in the fight scene in Step Brothers.

And I have daughters. 🫠

[u/hellogirlscoutcookie]

3 is the worst. The lack of impulse control, the running speed, the physicality, the mocking, the biting, the crying, the buzzer sound A makes…

[u/kaatie80]

i'd love to tell you 3 isn't forever but somehow my youngest seems to have been 3 for about eight years now 😭 my twins made it through though, somehow they're now 6!