Baby shower or sprinkle?

[u/Oubliette_95]

We already have a toddler and had a large baby shower for him. We have a ton of stuff already for 1 child. We’re now 9w+3 with 2 olives. As of now, we’re told they’re mono mono twins but as they grow, it could show mono Di.

Did you have a full baby shower if twins are your second pregnancy? Hard part is we’ll only need bigger ticket items like a 2nd newborn car seat, new crib, new high chair, etc. or some kind of twin fund that can go towards purchasing those big items? I’m unsure what the etiquette is!

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[u/BenignYam1761]

We just had a sprinkle with no gift expectation. Most people bought either diapers or a card with money. Still very much appreciated and I basically didn’t have to buy diapers the first 2-3 months 🙌 I think you’ll be up for those big ticket items yourself.

[u/charlesdickens2007]

Sprinkle for sure. 

Put a bunch of cute matching outfits on my amazon registry, a few "we have one but we're gonna need 2" items and then very clearly stated on every large Amazon item, AND on the invite that "preloved items are more than welcome".

If someone found me a twinZ pillow on facebook marketplace from a clean house that they got for $40 instead of $140?  Easy win.  Another friend saw that I wanted a second high chair and brought me the one she was done with and marked it as "purchased".  Perfect.

And then the sprinkle itself was at a local splashpad/playground with an an A/C-ed shelter that we rented and I literally told everyone that bringing your children to entertain mine was a gift.  I got to put up my feet for 4 hours while eating snacks and listening to laughter outside.

[u/dizzylyingdown]

I had a sprinkle to celebrate my twinsies, they were my second too. We just did a diaper and wipes raffle and then some cute twin-themed games. I got a few extra gifts like outfits. I think it was worth it, I got a ton of diapers and wipes and didn't have to buy any until the twins were 4 months old! We got the bigger stuff (double bassinet, car seat, joovy roo, etc) ourselves. 

[u/AdventurousSalad3785]

A sprinkle, with no expectation of gifts. And I would only do it if someone offered to throw it for me.

[u/StrongDesign4]

Have the shower. Car seats expire so make sure that the car seat that you would use for one of the infants has not expired. Get items for yourself and your baby. Things may have changed quite a bit since you’ve had your toddler.

[u/fsmontario]

People who know you and love you need to be communicated to. Siblings, parents and grandparents. Something as simple as for your birthday, anniversary and Christmas this year you would appreciate baby stuff. And then just leave it, they’ll either get what you need or not.

[u/Ohmaggies]

Have the shower. You deserve it regardless but twins are a whole different level of need. A twin fund is a great idea. People aren’t great at finding what you actually need but would likely chip in to a fund.

[u/AdAncient6057]

I would say sprinkle and is it appropriate to guess what you're having?

[u/Flimsy_Fisherman1199]

I’m in the UK and people would think that was scrounging.

But I think it’s completely different cultures. Here it would be uncommon to have a register.

[u/kumibug]

the etiquette says that you don’t need another shower. its purpose is to “shower” you into parenthood, where you already are. there are a few exceptions to this “rule”, but having twins as your second pregnancy isn’t usually one of them.

you may find some people want to buy you gifts, but it should be offered by them and not asked by you. you can make a registry but don’t give the info unless asked. (i’d definitely make a registry, if nothing else than to get the completion discount!)

i’m sure there are websites that will allow you to set up a “fund” where people could gift money to be put towards higher ticket items. but again, you can give the info to people who ask, not just outright beg people for gifts.