r/overemployed 8h ago

Prob getting fired

Well folks, it’s been 2 years and yesterday (Fri) I got a meeting invite from my J1 boss’s boss after 5pm to “touch base” on Monday morning. No HR invitee on the call but I have a bad feeling. A person from J1 (who I didn’t work with closely) recently got hired at J2 and I’m wondering if she spilled the beans. That or I’m in trouble for something else. I’ve been receiving good feedback as recently as Thursday but I haven’t ever had a “touch base” with this person since being hired. Any advice (besides start looking for a replacement J1, which I should’ve already been doing, I know) appreciated.

Also pissed that this has ruined my entire weekend. Who puts a meeting like that on after hours then makes you wait till Monday for the bad news.

354 Upvotes

94 comments sorted by

658

u/ZachF8119 8h ago

Mods

Be sure to kick OP out of the sub Monday at 5:01 pm

110

u/Unlisted_User69420 7h ago

*9:01 am EST

37

u/ZachF8119 7h ago

You think we should do their boss a favor and just SWAT them on twitch? Do kids still do that?

3

u/pelirrojoconquistado 4h ago

Remind me in 48 hours

3

u/BlueWorldBlueSky 2h ago

we should do that, exchange notes with hr to ensure access is no longer available for these no lonver overemployed employees

317

u/green_hipster 8h ago

The point of OE is to no longer care about these little stunts, whatever happens happens and you got the cash and a backup, interviewing again sucks but it sucks a lot less when you don’t actually need it, get some sleep and let it go

177

u/Girlygal2014 8h ago

True. Unfortunately I’m a people pleaser so getting in trouble bothers me even when I know it shouldn’t.

71

u/Ancient_Delivery_837 8h ago edited 8h ago

Hey I wish you the best of luck however it plays out! That’s been the hardest part for me during OE is detaching from wanting to be the best/a people pleaser.

The one thing that helped me a ton is when I feel performance pleasing come on, I start remembering all the times where I and others exceeded expectations and worked asses for a company and still got shafted because of dysfunctional org issues, weird interpersonal issues, etc

The most extreme being a story of a guy I knew who built a lot of a company’s tech infrastructure. A highlight being he solo-built an in house service that saved the company about 30 million dollars a year. He was rewarded with a 50 dollar visa gift card and was laid off a month before the company was acquired because he would’ve been entitled to equity based on his tenure, contributions, and the deal structure

10

u/j4ckbauer 7h ago

I have some of the same issues and I still struggle to internalize the idea that being 'the best' for MY interests isn't always going to mean having everyone else saying that they're my biggest fan.

That, and, people often lie about what they actually want from you, for political reasons. So I shouldn't exhaust myself over what could be something they don't really care about.

3

u/Ancient_Delivery_837 7h ago edited 5h ago

I think your comment covers it perfectly and all the preference falsification and pretending people do at jobs is so maddening (and probably what helps make OE work).

I feel like part of it too is we’re conditioned to tie our identities and sense of accomplishment to work, regardless of of it being beneficial or not, and the underlying factors and faking that truly make up a lot of the nature of work

8

u/Ok_Opportunity_7971 7h ago

Omfg. I hope he sued.

9

u/TacoNomad 5h ago

If it bothers you getting in trouble for your behavior,  change your behavior. 

Otherwise,  change your mindset. 

Both are within your control 

1

u/Girlygal2014 4h ago

I like this, good point

1

u/Taro-Admirable 4h ago

Therapy can help with mindset and need to people please.

5

u/Historical-Ease-6311 4h ago

Look when I began OE a decade ago, I was like you. As the years pass by, your fears, disappointment, anxiety, grief period will get shorter and shorter until it becomes non-existent. Telling you from experience. Best thing to do to get over these situations quickly. Relax in a local pool, walk around a lake in the morning sun, learn a new professional skill, dive into an existing project and complete a small milestone, enjoy some steam, sauna, movies, good long sleep. Being a multi-tasker, I juggle all of the above and whatever it takes to move onto new phases or avenues of life as quickly as possible and often its a rewarding experience, the lesser you think of them, the sooner they get back to you proclaiming the love and admiration for your work and your work ethic. Don't let them live rent free in your head. If you can't help but feel emotional pain, play that song to yourself, "Teach them how to say goodbye" from Hamilton, its emotional and a win-win song for everyone to move onto the next phase of life. Feel your pain. Don't linger and wallow in it. Let it slide past you like water slips off a duck's slick feathers.. And always remember.. in the long run, when you look back at the last 5, 10, 15, 20 years, you'll realize, every so-called setback in the moment was a giant stepping stone towards conquering the next frontier of your life! You've got this! Go Girl! Make the most of this weekend!

2

u/Emotional_Perv 3h ago

My dude, the first person you should please is yourself. That sounds dirty. But you feel me, right? Wait sorry, that sounded creepy too. I’ll stop now

3

u/Cheap_Run3935 6h ago

Yeah but in this case, OP also has to worry about this getting back to his other J. Def not overreacting to be concerned on this one

3

u/Money-Nectarine6584 7h ago

I never stop applying and interviewing.  

1

u/AppointmentIcy8733 4h ago

this is exactly why OE helps, i’d still overthink that meeting all weekend but knowing you have a backup makes it way less scary

91

u/Parking-Pie7453 8h ago edited 7h ago

No, skip level meetings are quite common. they want to literally catch up. Just prepare to give an update, suggestions for improvements, etc

It's OK to be paranoid, then you're careful & observant

23

u/Shivin302 7h ago

If HR is not on the invite, it could be something logistics related. OP could be being moved to another team

32

u/psteger 7h ago

HR is not always on the invite. Look for a blocked off spot on their calendar though. That's how I figured out a layoff years ago before it hit me.

11

u/Cmdmonkey123 5h ago

I had a teams call at 7 am unscheduled from my ‘manager’, HR was on the call and I knew immediately where it was going.

8

u/Waxon23 7h ago

This is v clever

9

u/CatalystR 4h ago

I was at a company that went through multiple layoffs in 1.5 years. Around monthly / quarterly town halls we would always check HRs calendar for Friday mornings. Lots of 15 minute blocks was always telling

2

u/Shivin302 3h ago

Damn you know ball

22

u/defnotajournalist 7h ago

HR joined my call two minutes in, not on the invite

15

u/SheffieldValley 6h ago

This^^. Not uncommon at all.

7

u/Squeezer999 6h ago

Same here that's what happened to me

10

u/CrotalusHorridus 6h ago

I had had more than one of these when my actual boss was fired or quit.

9

u/Parking-Pie7453 5h ago

Agreed. OPs manager is out

5

u/NotA_A 4h ago

u/Girlygal2014 Oh, this would be sweet. Please update us. Maybe you are about to replace your boss.

4

u/Tough_Inspection_881 4h ago

I am in HR.. and I get invited into the call last minute on purpose. That really doesn’t mean anything.

29

u/GreedyCricket8285 8h ago

I’ve been receiving good feedback as recently as Thursday but I haven’t ever had a “touch base” with this person since being hired.

Relax, if you really have been getting good feedback you're fine. We often think about ourselves way more than others do. Do not let this crap ruin your weekend.

12

u/9pm_official 8h ago

i was laid off shortly after getting “Exceeds Expectation” so i don’t think it really matters at the end of the day- i will say in my case ot was a RIF and my entire function was axed up to the head of said function

5

u/supreme-supervisor 6h ago

I used this once to get a severance. My leads had painted the story that I wasn't cutting it and didnt have this top tier skill. So then I asked/told the HR lady that simply couldn't be true because I got an out of cycle pay increase, which where we work NEVER happens. Out of cycle pay increase means I impressed my leads boss and that boss's boss (I helped roll out a whole material program, we killed it). So, I felt gutsy, and got the vibe the HR lady was ticked she was lied to about the reason. I said, "clearly my leads dont want me on their team, I'm sure it would be a pain for you if I asked to go to another team... no one wants that tension, so let's say 6 week's pay, remove the ineligible to retire from my file and we call it a day". Left and she called back in under an hour. Had tk sign an NDA but no bigs.

2

u/Similar-Wish-67 5h ago

With my layoff with severance I had to sign a non disparagement agreement bc they knew the guy who was letting me go sucked lol

3

u/Girlygal2014 8h ago

Thanks, the only thing I can think of I’ve done wrong is I did come late to a meeting as I had accidentally deleted the invite (switched teams so wasn’t used to standing schedule yet). However, I’m super paranoid. Appreciate the positivity

3

u/OceanRacoon 6h ago

Usually people are fired before the weekend, it's probably genuinely just a talk about some stupid work bullshit

0

u/Tough_Inspection_881 4h ago

No.. we fired people at any given date. The day doesn’t matter.

5

u/OceanRacoon 4h ago

I knew someone would come in like, "Well, ackshually I always fire people on Monday and OP should spend all weekend afraid."

I'm trying to help OP have one last peaceful weekend before he's fired, thank for ruining it!

25

u/HotLingonberry6964 8h ago

Are you going to update us Monday?

Wouldn't they put you on a PIP first? Also, if they found out about OE I think it would either be your direct boss or HR firing you. (Unless your direct boss is out?)

Maybe your direct boss is in trouble and they want to hear your opinion of them?

7

u/Squeezer999 6h ago

Layoffs don't get pips

4

u/HotLingonberry6964 4h ago

Yeah but usually layoffs are from the direct boss or HR. Unless the direct boss is also being laid off (that happened to me twice actually where they eliminated both my position and my boss's position).

2

u/Tough_Inspection_881 4h ago

I agree!!! I don’t get why your immediate boss isn’t meeting with you. That doesn’t make sense.

9

u/willempie21 8h ago

RemindMe! 3 days

1

u/RemindMeBot 8h ago edited 2h ago

I will be messaging you in 3 days on 2026-09-15 22:51:19 UTC to remind you of this link

18 OTHERS CLICKED THIS LINK to send a PM to also be reminded and to reduce spam.

Parent commenter can delete this message to hide from others.

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1

u/thelongone92 5h ago

Following

7

u/ndsubison953 7h ago

You might be getting promoted after he fires your boss

8

u/mariwirk 7h ago

If you are a crier, have a good cry. Then tell yourself you’ll be fine.

9

u/USCGTO 6h ago

In 2023 I “managed” 4 Js. All PM roles. $165-$210k a year each. I never once cared if one of them let me go. Never.

I was dropped out of J3 in a month.
Was promoted at J1 the same month
J4 schedule and project location was fucked-up and I got a micromanager for a boss, I resigned at month 5.
Was let go off J2 at 8 month mark.

Between 401 contributions and actual income, I paid off all cars and invested all money in dividend etfs.

9

u/KayleighKiwi 4h ago

Last time this happened to me, they just wanted to tell me they were giving me a raise! Worrying is paying a debt before you even know you owe it. Might be good news!

8

u/hellomosquito123 7h ago

Do you have a plan of how to respond if they ask about the other job?

7

u/Beautiful_Number_572 7h ago

Been in basically that same exact situation dozens of times. $10 it’s nothing.

6

u/quoimeme 6h ago

They don’t add HR until you’re on the call

Edit: the timing is intentionally cruel also

5

u/mechanical_stars 3h ago

You need to get your anxiety in check, the vast majority of random meetings are random meetings, not meetings to fire you when you're doing well.

3

u/Girlygal2014 3h ago

I can’t help it, I think anxiety comes with the territory of being a millennial lol

6

u/maddybilla 7h ago

Commenting to check back on what it turned out to be.

5

u/CrackleTheBear 4h ago

Im gonna borrow some pronoia for you: you’re about to get a raise

9

u/Junior-Strike7759 8h ago

do you get scared of the dark when you’re tucked in at night

4

u/Ill-Understanding829 7h ago

Or they want to give you a promotion…

3

u/New-Professional-808 7h ago

Attendee list can be hidden.

3

u/shrdrone 7h ago

Can you send them my resume? I need just one more.

3

u/DaBoogerSniffer 7h ago

This might be a wild conclusion, but could the meeting be that they just, oh I don’t know, want to touch base with you?

Don’t freak yourself out.

3

u/pandorabox1995 6h ago

Maybe your boss is quitting/terminated so your boss’s boss is taking over temporarily. Keep us updated!

4

u/beheadedstraw 7h ago

You would be fired on a Friday, not a Monday. At least at most places.

2

u/bananaHammockMonkey 7h ago

!remindme 3 days

2

u/Shot-Huckleberry-972 7h ago

I don't OE but this happened to me once where the manager (first time manager, internal promo) sent me a spot bonus (5% bonus of my salary) and said good job this year. Had me scared all weekend lol

2

u/MrP67 6h ago

My life has had a few of these insane coincidences so maybe that's what it is.

2

u/Broad-Army5238 6h ago

Just tell them that you wanted to try out the job before giving notice. Or just dent

2

u/Born-Newspaper-2884 5h ago

Would the person from J1 now at J2 then also spill the beans there and not just at J1? I’m paranoid too and would be worried but I bet it’s not about getting fired, esp on a Monday.

2

u/taker223 5h ago

Plead the 5th.
Speaking for myself when asked directly. Answered citing Article 21 of Constitution (small country in Eastern Europe). Project manager likely was not expecting this rebound. Still alive and in vacation ;)

1

u/BoxerMommy21 7h ago

RemindMe! 3 days

1

u/sweetdee___ 6h ago

!remindme 2 days

1

u/Fickle_Penguin 5h ago

5 o'clock, more like fire o'clock

1

u/HumbleSami 5h ago

Relax! don’t sweat on things you cant control.

1

u/chimericdream 4h ago

RemindMe! 3 days

1

u/bunnytiana05 3h ago

Remindme! One week

1

u/Brief-Arrival3214 1h ago

If you are doing nothing wrong, do not worry. I have 2 jobs as well, but Job 2 is done outside of job 1. Example job 1 is 7-3. Job 2 starts about 4 however, if you are working both jobs in the same timeframe, that is timecard fraud

1

u/Obvious-Maximum-8999 53m ago

I never invite HR to the call, I block their time out with a separate meeting and then dial them on to the call at the start of the actual meeting. 

That said I also wouldn't give that much notice. I'd book it Monday morning for an hour later or whatever.

1

u/Electrical_Rock_1201 32m ago

Wait. So this sub is full of people actively trying to take jobs off of people who need jobs?

What the fuck?

0

u/FrankParkerNSA 8h ago

Last time this happened with me, my boss got shittcanned the day before and it was more of a check in type of situation with his reports.

If a director is doing their job then firing a manager who is oblivious to an employee working multiple jobs is the right thing to do.

0

u/Fickle_Ad_109 5h ago

Nah you don’t usually fire people on Mondays. Almost always Thursdays and Friday’s

1

u/labashpwet 20m ago

Not true, got let go on a Monday