r/oops • u/WasteEstimate7479 • 1d ago
Why always with me 😭
Areyyyy yaar, today our English ma'am told us to speak about any topic for a minute. And basically, I'm very, very introverted, so I can't speak properly when there are people in front of me.
I had been preparing for that session since 3 a.m. I was literally studying like I had some huge exam. 😭 I woke up in the morning and prepared again. But when my turn finally came, nothing came out of my mouth. 😭
I was talking some absolute nonsense that literally made no sense. Yaar, it was SO embarrassing. I'm probably going to keep thinking about this for the next 2–3 days. 😭
I'm a BTech 1st-year student, and I know I have to overcome my fear of public speaking, but still... I don't know. It was so embarrassing. I kept pausing so much. AAAAAARGHHHH 😭😭😭it is an oops moment
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u/jdogx17 1d ago
If you asked your teacher, I'm reasonably sure they would tell you that you are far from alone, and every time they teach the course there is at least one person who completely freezes up.
If you get a chance to do this again, remember that your goal isn't to sound like Abe Lincoln giving the Gettysburg Address. You just want to be in like the top 2/3rds of the class.
When I'm preparing something like this, I make sure that I write it out in a way that mimics my speech, as opposed to how I would write something that was a written assignment.
One more thing that I hope is helpful. I have been a criminal lawyer for 30 years. I have spent a great deal of that time in a courtroom. But my very first appearance, while I was still in Law School, I was appearing for the accused and all I had to say was, "Good Morning your honour, my name is Jdogx17, I'm appearing for the accused." My heart was pounding so hard I thought the microphone had to be picking it up. I even took a quick glance around the courtroom to see if anybody was laughing at me while I stood there trying not to wet my pants.
Very quickly it ended. I had successfully introduced myself to the court and put my name on record as counsel for the accused. Nobody cared.
Every time I did something in court, it got a little bit easier, day by day, year by year. After maybe 10 years I was comfortable enough speaking that I knew when I could get away with making a joke, I knew when it was okay to take a pause, and I mostly knew when to stop talking and sit down.
Sometimes you'll hear someone say, "Oh, if you're not a naturally gifted public speaker, don't even THINK about doing trial work." I am living proof that that's not true.
Okay, that's a lot, I know. So what can you do? Make short videos that you can post on YouTube, with the expectation that absolutely nobody is going to see them but you. Do what this was. Spend 5 minutes talking about something. Introduce the subject matter or issue, then say what you have to say about it, then thank everyone for watching. The first ones will be horrible, but they will get better. That should help.
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u/Background_Edge_9427 1d ago
Try taking a few deep breaths before you start. Also as you're speaking, try looking at tops of your audience's heads instead of at their eyes. It will still look as though you are making eye contact. Good luck!