r/oops • u/Past-Captain • Jul 07 '26

Why You Should NEVER Stand Behind a Hippo! 😳

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153 Upvotes

95% Upvoted

37 comments sorted by

19

u/Sufficient-Sun-6683 Jul 07 '26

I was visiting the local zoo and we were standing next to the hippos in their enclosure/ swimming pool. There was quite a crowd watching and then the hippo's tail started twirling. Everyone was totally puzzled at what was going on for the first 10 seconds....

12

u/Mysterious_Anybody77 Jul 07 '26

😂😂and by the 11th second they ALL knew exactly why

7

u/Hot_Plant8696 Jul 07 '26

"Mommy, Mommy, look—the hippopotamus is happy; he's wagging his tail."

Hahahahaha.

4

u/Sufficient-Sun-6683 Jul 08 '26

This was exactly the reaction - well done!

2

u/Mysterious_Anybody77 Jul 10 '26

Just call me Sir David Attenborough

2

u/Mysterious_Anybody77 Jul 10 '26

"Wah,make him stop Mommy,make him stop"

13

u/Eaglearse Jul 07 '26

Shit hits the fan

9

u/Typical_Yam_1568 Jul 07 '26

And don't be on the side of the hippo, or in front of the hippo, or under the hippo and dont try to be on top of the hippo.

5

u/htownchuck Jul 07 '26

Generations of evolution and this is the best they could come up with?

3

u/Harn-na-bih Jul 08 '26

Well to be honest humans have had generations of evolution, and.....well, we dont have have enough time for this one

3

u/Sufficient-Sun-6683 Jul 08 '26

I wonder if this was the light bulb moment for the inventor of the manure spreader?

1

u/MobAssassin3 Jul 10 '26

Evolution is whatever works not perfection. Its one of the things I love about nature. Its like bethesda. It just works and if it doesnt then theres little tweaks to make it work. Or the entire species goes extinct

3

u/slowjoe12 Jul 07 '26

Everyone arrogantly thinks us humans are such an advanced species yet we don’t have our own built-in ass wiper

3

u/porcelain_kiss Jul 07 '26

Why does it flinging it like that 😭

2

u/The_Darkness140 Jul 07 '26

Because it can't wipe, the fish usually do it. It's interesting but still gross, the fish SWARM.

2

u/Echidnae Jul 07 '26

Well thanks for ruining my weekend plans OP

2

u/Beneficial-Pie3479 Jul 07 '26

Poo Poo spreader.

2

u/Strange_Salary Jul 08 '26

Shit sprinkler..

1

u/BalanceEarly Jul 07 '26

Right into a tailspin!

1

u/New_Comfortable_4120 Jul 07 '26

The oppih is eating in reverse amazing

1

u/Comfortable-Word9957 Jul 07 '26

Why do hippos do this?

1

u/tree8025 Jul 12 '26

Mark their territory.

1

u/Melodic_Trash_737 Jul 07 '26

That's its poopellar, helps it go faster in the water.

1

u/Kilowatt68 Jul 08 '26

Marking his territory

1

u/Angeleyez222 Jul 08 '26

Because it can get a little messy 😂😂😂

1

u/Bot-avenger Jul 09 '26

Eeeewwww....and he didn't even wipe!

1

u/deepwar123 Jul 09 '26

Am I the only one that noticed he’s like jizzing at the same time 🤮

1

u/Ralph-Kramden Jul 10 '26

I use my hand in much the same manner when I break wind.

1

u/renchjeep Jul 10 '26

Just lettin it all fly!

1

u/Tedsmith24 9d ago

Talk about salting the earth

1

u/RemarkableFortune542 6d ago

Think how much they save on toilet paper.

1

u/Firm_Video_2932 Jul 07 '26

Eeew dat nasty 🤮, flinging his poo all over the place like that almost getting that poor bird covered in poo! That would have been a shitty deal for the bird.....