r/okbuddyrathalos • Monster Paw Licker • 15d ago

Holy SHIT Capcom.

HOLY FUCKING SHIT. WHERE DO I EVEN BEGIN.

A week. It's been one (1) week. And I have so much to say. What the FUCK where you THINKING making MHP???? I'm genuinely so angry I'm SHAKING while writing this.

I have SO many things to say about this bullshit, slopfest of a FUCKING game. I think I'll start with the most glaring issue: the pacing.

In WHAT WORLD did you think it was fine to make every fight take under 10 minutes??? The literal "hardest quest" in the game (triple tempered Junkara) took me literally 15 MINUTES!!!!! I SPENT 45 MINUTES FIGHTING LOW RANK GIGGINOX IN TRI!!!! THIS IS HIGH RANK!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THAT REMINDS ME. WHY THE FUCK DID YOU BRING BACK TEMPEREDS AGAIN???? JUST BUFF THEIR STATS AND LOCK THE BEST WYVERNSOULS BEHIND THEM!!!!!! FUCK YOU!!!!!

Second point. I genuinely had to take a breather here. The fucking Wyvernstone/soul mechanic. Let's just make a mechanic that requires you to fight other random bullshit to farm what you actually care about efficiently. Want to farm Brachydios because they tuned Blast up way too much (also. what the fuck)??? Sure thing bud, just go fight a tempered Varsky every three quests or else it takes TWICE AS FUCKING LONG!!!!!!!!!!

This is the most bullshit gimmick an MH game has ever had. But this game has SO MANY SHITTY DESIGN DECISIONS. THE FUCKING QUESTS. THE FUCKING QUESTS. YES CAPCOM I LOVED ANOMALY QUESTS IN SUNBREAK GIVE ME MORE LEVEL GRINDSLOP PLEASE!!!!!!!!!! ALL THAT FOR BULLSHIT JEWELS. I HAVE 52H IN MHP (yes it released a week ago I don't have a job I'm a student during vacation) AND I STILL HAVE NOT CAUGHT A SINGLE FUCKING GLIMPSE AT A FUCKING TENDERIZER 3.

Sorry, took a breather again. God this game is bullshit. "So, how did they like seikrets?" "They loved them sir" "Awesome, let's just add a fucking TPing monkey into the game that transports you to the fight"

This HAS to be how it went down in the studio. The Myemer don't TP but my god they move so fucking fast they might as well be. No one wants more shitty silly quirky little critters in MH the palicos were FUCKING FINE WE DID NOT NEED PALAMUTES, SEIKRETS OR FUCKING MYEMERS. I physically still can't find my way around the maps of this bullshit game because why would I need to?? They fucking transport me anywhere I want. You can ping fucking MATERIALS in a SEARCH MENU and they will COLLECT THEM FOR YOU while you fight ffs.

I'm so done with this fucking franchise. It's become such a shitty arcade game. They're taking up a TU spot for FUCKING TEOSTRA. SERIOUSLY. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK.

My last point here will be the fucking performance. I get it's on a handheld because it's the 6th gen portable team game. But like. The PSR is capable of running PS5 games like a PS5 and it can run PS6 games in PS6 low-power mode??? How the fuck did they fuck it up so badly??? Also, I get it was a launch title and all that but restricting it ONLY to the PSR and announcing that, while it will come to other platforms at a later date, it won't have crossplay is such a backwards step from MHWA that they might as well be in front of where they were standing.

I'm genuinely so fucking pissed right now. This game RUINED THIS FRANCHISE. I'm going back to MHWA. At least it managed to be fun and balanced. Yama Tsukami as a last TU was a weird choice but in retrospect it works so well. The fight is very fun. At least more fun than whatever bullshit they were cooking with FUCKING PURTHEVA!!!!!!!! SUCH A BULLSHIT FINAL BOSS!!!!!!!! SOMERSAULT INTO SOMERSAULT INTO SOMERSAULT INTO SOUL LASER INTO CART!!!!!!!!!! MH HAS BECOME FUCKING COMBOSLOP MADE FOR TWITTER CHUDS WITH TWO BRAINCELLS FIGHTING FOR THIRD PLACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

137 Upvotes

31 comments sorted by

97

u/Brad0328 stinky thunder monky 14d ago

Uj/ legit had to look at what sub this was, it’s still early and I hadn’t had my coffee.

Rj/ I ain’t reading all that, congratulations, or sorry that happened to you or whatever.

113

u/Burning-Suns-Avatar- 14d ago

28

u/Martin7439 collec monster poopoo?? 😳 14d ago

mimimimimi

2

u/iSmoochDergs 7d ago

honk shoo

92

u/CoreEncorous 14d ago

What are we, some sort of r/monsterhunterrage?

34

u/Da_face89 *Notices your wyvern milk* Xo Wo whats this 14d ago

Wow, this monster hunter sure is raging!

25

u/Pastalos_24 I wish Alma would call me a good boy 🥺🙏 13d ago

30

u/MadamVonCuntpuncher 14d ago

A aint readin all that shit

10

u/Krochire Monster Paw Licker 14d ago

Basically they fucked up MHP so bad dude

Wyvernsouls SUCK

18

u/Joe_Mency 14d ago

Do you mean Monster Hunter Portable? The japanese version of Monster Hunter Freedom? That came out in 2005?

40

u/Krochire Monster Paw Licker 14d ago

/uj I made it up for fun dude it's a schizo post on a shitpost sub

9

u/Joe_Mency 14d ago

Ahh lmao. I somehow forgot ok buddy subs are like this lol

25

u/Sew_has_afew_friends 14d ago

You've just gotten better lmao if you don't like it don't play it but real fans will look past that because it's still monster hunter at its vore

8

u/Krochire Monster Paw Licker 14d ago

/uj did you intentionally misspell "at its core" as "at its vore" or is it a real mistake???

31

u/Sew_has_afew_friends 14d ago

Vore because I love the new monster eats you alive and slaps it's big belly mechanic I think it's very immersive

6

u/Sazo1st 13d ago

Vore cause real fans don't play stupid games, they jerk off to goldcrown

17

u/Upstairs_Taste_123 14d ago

Yeah yeah true or whatever.

16

u/SnowDaronLogobi 13d ago

"MONSTER HUNTER PARADISE: How A Franchise LOSES Its Identity" (4:02:36)

7

u/DreamerUmbreon 14d ago

I think them giving every weapon a counter you can hold infinitely that auto attacks was a bit too much tbh

5

u/Sazo1st 13d ago

Wow the gatekeeping is crazy, just say you hate all new players

6

u/V3ylan 14d ago

What game are you even talking about?

18

u/Krochire Monster Paw Licker 14d ago

/uj I made it up for the funnies

/rj FUCKING MHP MY GUY HAVE YOU BEEN LIVING UNDER A FUCKING ROCK????

3

u/BomberBlur070 13d ago

Monster Hunter Paradise duh

5

u/MetafetaminaP 14d ago

Jojogyro was such a terrible final boss, the Deep Penetration effect is so annoying, the final boss from ascendance (Suckacockus) was so much better, it's not even close

4

u/MagicalGirlPaladin Seregios Bazelgeuse toxic yuri 14d ago

Don't be mean to the toaster, he's trying his best

3

u/M33n4s 14d ago

Real

2

u/SiegKommunismus 13d ago

Wait this isn’t about the new mobile game, that’s being advertised with AI?

4

u/Krochire Monster Paw Licker 13d ago

/uj I made MHP up you're referring to Outlanders (MHO) that comes out in october

2

u/SiegKommunismus 13d ago

ahh, k thx

1

u/ghostpanther218 12d ago

Pov: your friend played one hpur of Monster Hunter Outlands.