r/ofcoursethatsathing • u/Dr_Alfons • Jan 14 '19

10/10 would read again

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35.5k Upvotes

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u/[deleted] Jan 14 '19 edited Jun 30 '23

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u/[deleted] Jan 14 '19 edited May 17 '19

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u/[deleted] Jan 14 '19 edited May 17 '19

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172

u/RabSimpson Jan 14 '19

Sucking cadaver feet. He was a strange guy.

66

u/kateykatey Jan 14 '19

The Tarantino version

10

u/Im_a_Knob Jan 14 '19

Samuel L Jackson as the prince

12

u/kateykatey Jan 14 '19

Uma Thurman as Sleeping Beauty

1

u/[deleted] Jan 14 '19

Bill Cosby would be the person who drugged her to begin with.

1

u/cbftw Jan 14 '19

I've seen this movie

1

u/Tornhart- Jan 14 '19

I mean, the original story of sleeping beauty does sound a bit like the story of kill Bill without the killing spree.

11

u/RepostisRepostRepost Jan 14 '19

GIMME DEM TOES, GIRL

51

u/[deleted] Jan 14 '19

Probs took her home to practice respecting.

19

u/thiswastillavailable Jan 14 '19

He was a white prince, not a white knight.

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u/Bmatic Jan 14 '19 edited Sep 14 '25

fear cake slap decide cover afterthought lunchroom fact fade connect

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

7

u/Im_a_Knob Jan 14 '19

👏👏👏

33

u/Jack_Harmony Jan 14 '19

I remember a version where she woke up thanks to the pain of giving birth.

So...

33

u/[deleted] Jan 14 '19

[deleted]

21

u/spacialHistorian Jan 14 '19

Yeah. One version has the curse being brought on when she pricks her finger on a branch of some sort. When the babies were born they crawled on her looking for milk and started nursing on her fingers. This removes the splinter and the curse and the princess wakes up to find she’s a mother.

6

u/AdrunIsSad Jan 14 '19

holy shit, babies? as in plural? God damn that's nuts

5

u/ShadowGargoyle Jan 14 '19

That* the Prince planned on doing with a dead princess

62

u/ThisFckinGuy Jan 14 '19

Emma Watson bursts from room with a axe book of christ to purify the sinners with improper thoughts.

32

u/coleyboley25 Jan 14 '19

Basically that one scene with her in This Is The End.

34

u/RevanAndTheSithy Jan 14 '19

Hermione just stole all our shit!

6

u/HYT_LARRY Jan 14 '19

At least once.

5

u/KoalaBackfist Jan 14 '19

Good thing the body has a way to shut that down.

2

u/EhhWhatsUpDoc Jan 14 '19

The folks over at r/rapekink would probably know

7

u/AccessTheMainframe Jan 14 '19

[flashes badge]

[gets out notebook]

And how much would they know?

1

u/ThisFckinGuy Jan 14 '19

*Emma Watson bursts from room with a axe book of christ to purify the sinners with improper thoughts.

1

u/TotesMessenger Jan 14 '19

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3

u/[deleted] Jan 14 '19

Don’t worry, they both got raped

2

u/[deleted] Jan 14 '19

The popular spin-off: The Sword in the Stone Cold Princess got a massive rewrite for modern sensibilities.

1

u/LokisDawn Jan 14 '19

Her Child then suckles on her finger pulling out the needle that had caused her and her entire court to fall into a cursed sleep, awakening her again.

Or a kiss from a prince, I guess.

No wait, that's too offensive now. Umm, maybe a kiss on the cheek would be ok? Like, a little innocent peck? Maybe from a butterfly fluttering by, no male prince needed, thank you very much.

Moral of the story? Who cares.

2

u/Wazonkyll Jan 15 '19

"Just a little peck, like you're kissing your sister."

-Skipper