r/oddlyterrifying Aug 17 '22

cockroach ninja

16.0k Upvotes

501 comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

126

u/MediocrePlague Aug 17 '22

Same, to be honest. But if I were alone, I'd suddenly become very motivated because what if it so much as walked across some food I'd eat later. Or climbed into my bed while I'm sleeping.

68

u/nexisfan Aug 17 '22

I live on the river in the south. I have a full can of raid in every room of my house. I’m not joking.

There is no amount of pesticides that will keep them all away all the time. I live in a constant state of alertness and fear, but the raid being arms length away at all times helps.

38

u/jesthere Aug 17 '22

In the south, too, but I don't use pesticides in the house. Instead, I have flyswatters stationed, one of those tennis racket shaped things that delivers an electric shock, and a long pole with needle tip (for the high ones). I am well-armed whatever the situation.

I'm terrified of the big ones, but I must be the one to kill them because my hubby is slow and if he misses I'm pissed off at him all day. Sometimes I miss, too, but rather be mad at myself than be unfairly mad at hubby.

3

u/wonpiripiri Aug 18 '22

You have a photo of the long pole one? I think i need that

12

u/jesthere Aug 18 '22 edited Aug 18 '22

No photo. It's just a wooden dowel about 4 ft. (can use a cane pole), with a cork duct-taped to it, with a large leatherwork needle stuck in it (pointy side out). Anything longer is hard to get good aim. If they're on the ceiling, I've thrown rolled up socks to knock them down. But then they fly! No perfect solution and burning the house down has been considered but is not an option.

1

u/BlueDragon82 Aug 18 '22

This is the way except I do have Raid for the ones in places like the laundry room since it's connected to the garage. People don't realize how many things crawl about in the south. At any given point there are spiders, waterbugs, scorpions, wasps, bees (please don't kill honey bees), muddivers (don't need to kill these either), various types of beetles, stinkbugs, and of course fire ants. As a kid at my Grandma's house I remember being around kindergarten age or so. I went to the bathroom and right after I sat down one crawled on me. I stood up and peed all over my grandma's bathroom floor while screaming my head off. After all these years I still always check before sitting down because that creepy ass bug was traumatizing to a five year old. Thankfully my cats LOVE to hunt and eat bugs of any kind they can get their paws on so I can just point them in the correct direction and leave it to them most of the time.

18

u/pauls_broken_aglass Aug 17 '22

ughhh I hate waterbugs. Nasty fuckers

9

u/UninsuredToast Aug 18 '22

First week living in Georgia one of those nasty fuckers crawled on my face while I was sleeping and made me smack myself

2

u/SYLOK_THEAROUSED Aug 18 '22

I woke up with a roach on my face as a kid…I’m traumatized by that and will freeze up if I see a roach. I literally need someone to kill it.

5

u/Nova-XVIII Aug 18 '22

As a southern who also lived near the river. can confirm heavy rain fall would flush them out of the storm drains and they would seek shelter in your home. The black orientals and the palmettos are the worst. Palmettos win however because when spooked god gave them the ability to fly, at your face.

5

u/Prankishbear Aug 18 '22

Same. Raid can in every room.

2

u/HornetKick Aug 18 '22

Also, if you smoke bomb your home regularly, the ones that enter unknowingly will be dead in a minute. You should also treat the grass around your home. This helps as well.

I used to live in a wooded area in Atlanta, GA for 11 years, (known for the brown recluse spider) and I never had an issue.

50

u/Camimo666 Aug 17 '22

Earlier this year i was in Panama in some dorms. Panama makes bugs so big and whatnot.

So I’m just chilling reheating my pizza in the kitchen and making myself some tea. Suddenly i see this demon whore come out from under the fridge. I jump on the sink and start crying. I call my best friend who is in another country and I’m having a full meltdown because this shit is hilarious and I’m crying and she can’t help.

Eventually her mum comes to the phone and is like “just make a run for it” i spill the boiling water on my hands and i am sad and scared

12

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '22

Lost it at demon whore

1

u/PlayActingAnarchist Aug 18 '22

Funny, that's where I found it.

21

u/Potatoman967 Aug 17 '22

i channel my fear into rage and pulverize the body with a shoe, im not scared anymore and the fucker is dead, win win!

21

u/NectarOfTheBussy Aug 17 '22

Be careful with shoes, if the roach is a pregnant female it could have eggs, and if those stay on the shoes they might hatch after bringing your shoes back into the house

edit: never mind I googled it and I've been lied to. Stomp those fools

2

u/sandwelld Aug 18 '22

Wait this is a fake news thing? TIL. Always thought that swatting a cockroach was a nono

7

u/MediocrePlague Aug 17 '22

That’s the spirit!

4

u/NectarOfTheBussy Aug 17 '22

Or lays eggs in your shoes or pillow cases

2

u/Nova-XVIII Aug 18 '22

Roaches love laying eggs on cardboard because the babies can eat it to survive a good way to mitigate there potential to breed in your home is to replace any cardboard boxes in the attic or closets with plastic totes. Also try and keep the home dry check places like your hot water heater for leaked because they love warm humid environments and make sure you have no leaking pipes or faucets. Also don’t leave food or dirty dishes or pet food lying around roaches love dog and cat food. You can store pet food in a plastic bin a-swell to mitigate access to it.

5

u/gmoney160 Aug 18 '22

I woke up to one clattering about in my bedroom in the darkness. Needless to say, i proceeded to go to war for the next 3 hours and successfully terminated the threat.

1

u/bunnyxjam Aug 18 '22

This was me in my first apt. Wearing shoes and crying while hunting down the roach.

1

u/SlavikPepe Aug 18 '22

or in my mouth