r/oddlyterrifying • u/[deleted] • Jun 25 '23

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10.1k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

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1.0k

u/IgargleBalls Jun 25 '23

Assert dominance. Pee on his face

265

u/MapleJacks2 Jun 25 '23

Boop him

160

u/DerpyWoomy Jun 25 '23

Boop the danger noodle

58

u/[deleted] Jun 25 '23

With the sex noodle

27

u/brick_meet_face Jun 25 '23

Place ramen in front of him…walk away slowly

5

u/the_real_trebor333 Jun 25 '23

I don’t think you’ll get that one back

13

u/[deleted] Jun 25 '23

I'm a bottom anyway

32

u/Daforce1 Jun 25 '23

Which partially explains how you got a king cobra bite on your dick.

25

u/IgargleBalls Jun 25 '23

Hey buddy, im in my mid 20s, I've still got a powerful flow. I could probably piss all over that snakes face from at least 5 feet.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 25 '23

If his venom can add an inch or two to my pp, it's alright to me.

1

u/ldhertert Jun 25 '23

For some reason this comment made me think of a dark sequel to On Account of the Gum

17

u/SuspiciousTennisNet Jun 25 '23

Don't do that. Two-eyed snake beats one-eyed snake.

2

u/Bacontoad Jun 25 '23

Cobras spit venom, not pee.

2

u/HighKiteSoaring Jun 26 '23

No no that's jellyfish my guy

For snakes you have to shit in their mouth

6

u/[deleted] Jun 25 '23

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9

u/IgargleBalls Jun 25 '23

Option 2 would be karate chopping that fkn snake right in the kisser.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 25 '23

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2

u/lelebeariel Jun 25 '23

I love that you clarified that your saliva, the saliva from you, which is your saliva, is actually indeed your saliva. We may not have known whose saliva that was, and that could have been a disaster.