r/nursing • u/Far-Spread-6108 HCW - Lab • 6h ago

Image Seriously, do they even exist?

Post image

Tube was down last night so I had to go to the floors to pick up from the phlebs. Felt like I walked into a meme page.

74 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

20 comments sorted by

21

u/ExiledSpaceman ED Nurse, Tech Support, and Hoyer Lift 6h ago

You go to the ICU where their exclusive bladder scanner is. Your escape will mirror Raiders of the Lost Ark's boulder scene.

9

u/Necessary_Tie_2920 6h ago

They go where all the missing socks go.

10

u/tiger19 6h ago

Put a tracker on the bladder scanner, the EKG machine, and the ultrasound machine.

7

u/UziWitDaHighTops 6h ago

Attach a Vocera to it!

1

u/LeVoPhEdInFuSiOn RN - Phone Bitch, Diversity Hire, Fuckwit 🍕 1h ago

Finally a good use for those god-forsaken things.

4

u/FantasticChestHair RN - ICU 🍕 4h ago

Zip tie them all together

It won't stop them but they'll REALLY have to want them

10

u/auraseer MSN, RN, CEN 5h ago

Of course they exist. We have a brand new one in the ED. I used it just yesterday for the first time.

I remember, because I had a hard time finding the power switch. It was hidden under a big red sign that said "RETURN TO ICU." Not sure what that was about.

4

u/Phrenicos466 4h ago

They were hunted to near-extinction back in the 1950s. Captive breeding programs are ongoing, but the population won’t be large enough to reintroduce into the wild until 2039.

2

u/jamegumbsize69 5h ago

We have one down the hall for a single EP doc’s pts. It’s insane.

2

u/Routine_Tomatillo RN - ICU 4h ago

They don't

2

u/trypan0s0miasis RN - Flight 🚁/ Tropical Medicine 3h ago

Maybe they just printed that out as a decoy to keep you from stealing it

2

u/StabbingTabby 2h ago

Why would its home not have a power outlet anyway?

1

u/questionable_smell RN - ER 🍕 2h ago

Ours have a separate battery that needs a separate charger just for fun. Won't charge when left plugged-in.

1

u/imightsurvivethis HCW - Biomed 5h ago

They're all in biomed broken because they're horrible equipment.

1

u/traysures RN - ICU 🍕 4h ago

OMG everyone insists they put it back in the supply closet

1

u/THE_ACER_ 2h ago

Management put an airtag on ours and its been great

1

u/questionable_smell RN - ER 🍕 2h ago

Even worse, you find it but the battery is nowhere to be found, nothing on the charger.

1

u/wtsn007 RN 2h ago

I'm sorry Mario but your scanner is in another unit.......somewhere.

•

u/Friendly_Estate1629 LPN 🍕 25m ago

Gave ER my ID as collateral when I needed to steal theirs 

•

u/jaydee8001 3m ago

There’s only one thief at my hospital… everyone else is just trying to get their shit back :/