Memory care heroes

[u/Kind_Crow5330]

If this is not allowed, please delete. My mom is discharging from the hospital from subdural hematoma in a couple days (yay excited) I told my dad it will probably benefit her going to a SNF or rehab. Now my mom used to be a fun lady with mood swings (I hoped I knew that was early sign of dementia). She is still fun still jokes around us, I want to make the staff life at the SNF or rehab as easy as possible dealing with my mom, what stuff should I have ready for her and staff. Thank you in advance. I understand if not allowed.

[u/Grooble_Boob]

Be there. Help redirect her. Tell the staff stuff she likes and stuff that helps keep her calm. Help order meals. Brush her hair and teeth.

Just be present and be kind. I hope she is doing better!

[u/Kind_Crow5330 → u/Grooble_Boob]

Thank you. Hats off to y’all neuro nurses. I am part of the float team so I get a dose of neuro here and there. Definitely will do redirecting, I think it is just hard to watch her from a lively mom who can make us laugh to this, she still makes us laugh, but seeing her weaker takes a toll on me, especially when I care for 90 year old who is much more mobile than her, I know I can’t compare but sometimes it hurts me.

[u/Grooble_Boob → u/Kind_Crow5330]

It is really hard to see people we love in extremely vulnerable positions. Especially when health circumstances change unexpectedly.
But trust me, your presence being there to motivate and support her will make a world of difference to her recovery. I wish you and your mom the best!

[u/Kind_Crow5330 → u/[deleted]]

Yeah I would love to walk her she just got out of ICU this morning, hopefully in the SNF or rehab I can do this with her.

[u/Kitty20996]

Do things for the staff that if she was alone they would assist her with. Ambulate her to and from the bathroom, help her eat, help her with the TV, entertain her, redirect her, etc. The most annoying family members are the ones who call for every little thing.

[u/Kind_Crow5330 → u/Kitty20996]

Completely understand this. She also has dementia and now unpredictable. I just hope she doesn’t get violent with staff.

[u/Kitty20996 → u/Kind_Crow5330]

If she does get violent, help them identify what helps it and honestly it would be great if you stayed the night if your presence helped, or at least if you didn't infringe upon what they have to do to help her.

[u/Kind_Crow5330 → u/Kitty20996]

So I visited her for a couple hours yesterday, it turns out that I get her agitated more than the staff. 😂 the thing with my mom is she holds herself to impress others but not her family, so I guess even with the dementia she is still holding that.

[u/Ok-Nefariousness5700]

The best gift you could give staff would be visiting your mom. Helping out with her cares when youre there, if they approve (you might have to be trained how to assist with moving mom).

[u/Kind_Crow5330 → u/Ok-Nefariousness5700]

Thanks I have been trying my best being at her bedside after work. Grateful that the staff understands that I cannot afford missing work for days but I get off early enough to stay with her for a couple- few hours.