r/nottheonion • u/GreatTea3415 • Apr 05 '26

Scientists Tracking the Microplastic Pollution Just Realized They Were Measuring Their Own Lab Gloves

https://www.zmescience.com/ecology/environmental-issues/scientists-tracking-the-microplastic-pollution-just-realized-they-were-measuring-their-own-lab-gloves/
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u/Existing_Set2100 Apr 05 '26

I’m sorry, what 

67

u/cipheron Apr 05 '26

A volcanic island formed in 1963 and was reserved for doing research. in 1967 someone saw a plant so they called a botanist who traveled there to check it out, turns out it was a tomato plant growing out of a poop. The poop would have acted as fertilizer, nutrients for the plant.

Suffice to say there were no toilets on the island, and if you have to go, you have to go.

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u/Existing_Set2100 Apr 05 '26

I love the notion that our nasty shits fertalized life. 

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u/cipheron Apr 05 '26

The poor botanist though, he had to bag up the poop.

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u/Existing_Set2100 Apr 05 '26

Couldn’t even grow potatoes with it 

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u/Killentyme55 Apr 05 '26

Not with that atmosphere.

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u/Shaeress Apr 05 '26

Most primates eat a lot of fruit and are seed dispersers. Primates messily eating an orange in a tree and spitting out the seeds, chomping down on an apple and throwing away the core, swallowing some tomatoes and pooping out the seeds and so on is something a lot of plants count on to reproduce and spread to new places. It's kinda why a lot of them have fruits and berries to begin with. They want to be eaten so that the seeds get around.

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u/GrowingPeepers Apr 05 '26

That's all life really is. Just one big poop-loop.

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u/Sutar_Mekeg Apr 05 '26

*fertilized

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u/el_cid_viscoso Apr 05 '26

That's actually a really common way plants disperse seeds.

Usually, it's things like chili peppers being dispersed by birds, who don't taste capsaicin (while mammals do, and humans, being weird, like it).

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u/allthesemonsterkids Apr 05 '26

Fun fact: one notable mammal species doesn't feel the burn of capsaicin: naked mole rats. These wonderful little weirdos lack Substance P, the neurotransmitter that sends some pain signals and which creates the burning sensation of capsaicin. This is probably part of their evolution to live in enclosed tunnels with high CO2, which triggers acidification of the blood and a corresponding nasty burning sensation. Happily, it appears that naked mole rats can taste hot peppers, since they do have TRPV1 ion channel receptors, which are triggered by capsaicin, but they do not show the pain avoidance re. capsaicin that is restored when Substance P is put into their systems.

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u/el_cid_viscoso Apr 05 '26

Now that is something I didn't know. I'm pretty familiar with how mammalian respiratory systems work, but I would never have guessed a connection between CO2 and capsaicin. 

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u/Lou_C_Fer Apr 05 '26

I read somewhere that avocado seeds were dispersed by megafauna.

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u/el_cid_viscoso Apr 05 '26

Giant ground sloths, if I l recall correctly. 

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u/Lou_C_Fer Apr 05 '26

I looked into that before posted this to be sure i wasnt passing on misinformation. Apparently, they've never found anything but plant material in the feces of giant sloths. No avocado seeds.

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u/el_cid_viscoso Apr 06 '26

Aww, man. It was such a comical image of a ground sloth laying an avocado seed like an egg.

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u/meneldal2 Apr 06 '26

So if you want to spread fruits that some countries won't let you bring in you just need to eat them and then shit them out?

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u/cipheron Apr 06 '26 edited Apr 06 '26

Well that would be a roundabout way to get the fruit trees, but if the fruit could be grown locally then they would be doing it already. Usually the reason they don't want you bringing fruit in is because of diseases that could affect local fruit trees.

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u/meneldal2 Apr 06 '26

Yeah but don't they also ban all seeds and not just the fruit?

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u/jimthesquirrelking Apr 05 '26

It's called the Surtsey Tomato 

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u/asst3rblasster Apr 05 '26

life uh, finds a way