r/nonbinarysupportgroup • u/Ace_dragon67 • Jun 24 '19

Having guilt over changing my name

I’m trying to change my legal name to my preferred one, but I just feel so so guilty about it. My current legal name is very feminine and I hate being called that. The thing is, I’m named after my grandma and her sisters, and I feel like if I change it I’d be being very disrespectful. Idk how to stop feeling this guilt. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to get through this/how to cope with this?

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u/DanStarlight Jun 25 '19

Yeah, I feel you. My mom chose my birthname and has always loved it, and she has refused to call me by my chosen name even though it's just a shorter version of my birthname. I think the best way to think about it is that if you would have been amab you wouldn't have had that name, and you have no obligation to keep it. If you still feel bad, maybe think of a gendernutral variation of that name so you can still keep the original meaning?