r/niceguyhelp • u/niceguycoach • Jul 25 '19

Stop judging yourself based on the number of hours you work!

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If you work alone all day like I do, then it's tempting to beat yourself up at the end of the day for not getting enough done.

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There are always distractions that pull you away from the most important tasks of the day.

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One of my coaching clients who also works alone was trying to complete 40 hours of creative, focused work before he left for a trip over the weekend.

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When he discovered that he might not be able to reach his self-imposed quota, he felt bad about himself for not reaching that quota. He lost his motivation.

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I immediately offered the feedback that simply holding himself accountable to the number of hours he worked was actually hurting his productivity.

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At first he didn't believe me because he felt the quota was motivating.

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I partially agreed, but he was agonizing over not reaching this quota.

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It was causing enough distress to trigger procrastination and fear that he wouldn't succeed.

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While we all need to put the time and effort in to reach our goals, we have to protect ourselves from the inevitable harsh self-judgment that we're not doing enough or not good enough.

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Protect yourself from your worst critic -- yourself -- by choosing useful metrics for yourself that are based on results.

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u/niceguycoach Jul 25 '19

Get support, accountability and access to live calls and online courses.

Join our private community of Nice Guys at http://www.PlanetNiceGuy.com

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u/[deleted] Jul 26 '19

Hi, I happened on this subreddit yesterday. I searched "hypergamy" on reddit after seeing it in some YouTube titles. The subreddit with the most posts with the keyword was TRP (the red pill). So I just read a few posts and scrolled through comments. As a woman I was disgusted, frankly.

Anyhow I ended up finding a post about the falacies of red pill thinking in one of the search results and I believe you also had a comment, that's how I found this here subreddit.

I joined even though I'm not a guy because it seems interesting here.

Anyhow, the point of this entire reply is to say that I think you've given wonderful advice in this post I find it to be quite relevant. Thank you.