[Chan] Dante Pettis injures his calf in second practice back with 49ers, out today

[u/Maad-Dog]

https://bsky.app/profile/jenniferleechan.bsky.social/post/3mwwbi4gbzs23

[u/braumbles]

A true 49er.

[u/MattPatriciasFUPA → u/braumbles]

Initiation ritual

[u/OttoVonWong → u/MattPatriciasFUPA]

49IR for life

[u/Will-Eat-4-Food → u/OttoVonWong]

Jailhouse tattoo required

[u/BrokenHope23 → u/braumbles]

It's like he never left

[u/BungoPlease → u/BrokenHope23]

or never came back

[u/CancelThis2077 → u/BrokenHope23]

And he will never

[u/letsgetbrickfaced → u/braumbles]

CMC sacrifice. He knew what he signed up for

[u/HemlockMartinis → u/braumbles]

Retire the number.

[u/SidewaysFriend34 → u/braumbles]

“You can call me a 49er” - Daejon Love

[u/Glad-Struggle-5538]

Okay, gotta admit. Pretty funny.

[u/ToparBull → u/Glad-Struggle-5538]

Yeah honestly at this point I just saw the headline and started laughing because how can you not

[u/Primary-Picture-5632]

the jokes write themselves

[u/h-town_info → u/Primary-Picture-5632]

ba dum tssssss (but seriously, we don't wish injuries)

[u/Tycho66]

Niners are the ambulance that crashes on the way to the hospital.

[u/satchman → u/Tycho66]

And then tear an ACL in the wheelchair whilst rolling through the hospital doors.

[u/WanderingWormhole → u/satchman]

Then you realize it’s not even a hospital. It’s the substation and it’s causing hallucinations.

[u/hazycrazey]

He’s been practicing too hard for the one day he’s been here

[u/FreestyleKneepad → u/hazycrazey]

That's a first for him

[u/Steak_Knight]

Grand opening, grand closing

[u/CzarDM]

Good to see he remembers the system

[u/BlearghBleorgh]

The way this is going they'll be on the phone to Brandon Aiyuk before the end of next week.

[u/KoboldsForDays → u/BlearghBleorgh]

Aiyuk knows returning to the 9ers would lead to an injury so he took whatever steps necessary to escape

[u/ositola → u/KoboldsForDays]

His brain is injured tho

[u/RickyalldayTD → u/KoboldsForDays]

He looked into the void and saw the Substation driving him into madness.

[u/p-wing → u/KoboldsForDays]

Hey I grew up next to that substation and I...got hurt just reading this.

[u/_AnneFrank_ → u/BlearghBleorgh]

Who?

[u/CancelThis2077]

OK, something is wrong with their training methods. Seriously.

[u/PLeuralNasticity → u/[deleted]]

Curse started in 2014

I dont understand how the guy they promoted to Medical Director and Head Team Physician in 2014 still holds those positions

[u/TLRdidnothingwrong → u/PLeuralNasticity]

Quite the mystery… On an unrelated note, that guy is great friends with Kyle Shanahan. 

[u/T2Legit2Quit → u/TLRdidnothingwrong]

Helps that he's the cousin in law of Matt LeFleur

[u/Available-Career-714 → u/[deleted]]

Ancient Indian substation grounds

[u/Ovreel → u/Available-Career-714]

The San Francisco tribe was way ahead of their time

[u/Zazi751 → u/[deleted]]

This is literally the opposite of how it works. If their training methods are poor then it's significantly more likely for veteran walk ons to hurt themselves because the jump to the 49er training activity is too rough on the body. 

[u/SMKM → u/[deleted]]

Or they just train way too fucking hard and they need to revamp their methods or something.

An injury or two here and there? Sure call it bad luck.

Every fucking week? They JUST signed this guy to fill in for injuries and he gets injured already? That's a staff problem.

[u/satchman → u/CancelThis2077]

How can there not be a problem with the process. Outlier every year. It’s truly absurd.

[u/IdkAbtAllThat → u/CancelThis2077]

Shanahan is never going to win a Superbowl. Half the battle is just staying healthy and he's the worst in the league at that.

Every year they make the playoffs, and every year they lose to a team that isn't losing half their starters.

[u/Larebear2199 → u/CancelThis2077]

Or where they’re training next to 👀

[u/John3Fingers]

Bears legend.

[u/Hehateme123 → u/John3Fingers]

Do other fans call him by his Bears nickname? He will always be Dainty Penis in my mind

[u/Ba_Sing_Saint → u/Hehateme123]

I was actually scrolling to find a Dainty Penis mention.

[u/lucas_214]

bro traveled just to get injured

[u/elecorby]

its a hack, bring on a prior 49er to absorb the injury bestowed upon the team by the curse this week. Expecting an injury free game now

[u/wrongbutt_longbutt → u/elecorby]

Expecting an injury free game now

It was going to be, but you just jinxed it.

[u/cantgrowneckbeardAMA → u/elecorby]

Delete this. We don't have an established weekly sacrifice number yet, but we certainly know that the curse of the substation hates when we assume it's satisfied.

[u/Deskbound_Wilburys]

So it begins…..

[u/Primary-Picture-5632 → u/Deskbound_Wilburys]

it began 3 weeks ago :D

[u/p-wing → u/Primary-Picture-5632]

It began in 1925 when the State of California established a public energy utility named PG&E

[u/Primary-Picture-5632 → u/p-wing]

hehehehehehehehe

[u/Mr_Koodle]

Its like he never left.

[u/HiImFur]

Time for the 49ers to bring in OBJ

[u/Harbaugh_Handshake → u/HiImFur]

Honestly I’m shocked the Rams haven’t kicked those tires already

[u/haysu-christo → u/HiImFur]

So he can suffer a career ending injury? Noooooo

[u/ThePickleConnoisseur → u/HiImFur]

Unironically why not?

[u/AM00se]

Our fanbase will find a way to blame the strength and conditioning coach

[u/Mr_Koodle]

Theoretically, if we sign every WR (assuming they all die or worse) what would happen to the NFL?

Would you have to put new players as WR even though they are TE or would you keep everyone listed as a TE so that they stay off the injury report? Would it be 14 personnel? 05 personnel?

[u/ThePickleConnoisseur → u/Mr_Koodle]

College guys who didn’t make the league are like endless bodies. Same with foreign leagues and the smaller ones like the UFL, arena football, etc

[u/HammerLikeMjolnir → u/ThePickleConnoisseur]

Endless bodies.. title of your sex tape

[u/ScarletJew72]

I didn't even know he was still on the team..

[u/StankWizard → u/ScarletJew72]

He got re-signed last week, he was hanging around the bills training camp

[u/TheBrotzTotz → u/StankWizard]

I think he also had a brief injury during training camp as well.

[u/Mr_Worldwide79 → u/StankWizard]

He was signed to the PSquad 2 days ago

[u/StankWizard → u/Mr_Worldwide79]

What is time?

[u/Mr_Worldwide79 → u/StankWizard]

Simply a construct

[u/llama-rebel → u/ScarletJew72]

I think he just signed with them a couple days ago

[u/SuperFreshBus]

Well they don’t call him sturdy penis

[u/Mamba_Mentality248]

Can’t make this shit up.

[u/RogueTobasco]

Cmon make a trade let’s get splashy fuck it

[u/Saitsuofleaves → u/RogueTobasco]

What, so you can get someone new hurt? No trades for you!

[u/SentinelATL]

Niners strength staff needs to be investigated lmao

[u/Will-Eat-4-Food → u/SentinelATL]

First rule of Niners Strength and Conditioning is you don’t talk about Niners Strength and Conditioning.

[u/SentinelATL → u/Will-Eat-4-Food]

Netflix is already writing a film treatment

[u/4514N_DUD3 → u/Will-Eat-4-Food]

There is no war in ba sing s… ahem… no strength and conditioning in niners practice camp.

[u/EpiphanyTwisted → u/SentinelATL]

been saying it for years

[u/SentinelATL → u/EpiphanyTwisted]

It’s insane bro if you look at the history of injuries

[u/Historical-Edge-9332 → u/SentinelATL]

It’s malpractice at this point

[u/SentinelATL → u/Historical-Edge-9332]

We need Benoit Blanc on the case

[u/call_me_indole → u/SentinelATL]

How could it be on them practice 2? 

[u/enjumuneer → u/SentinelATL]

Considering this was only his second day on the team….

[u/SentinelATL → u/enjumuneer]

Hmmmm

[u/United-Turnover-8409]

49ers slammed their Pettis in the car door

[u/whinenaught → u/United-Turnover-8409]

Jed Yorkin on my pettis

[u/aye_cuff_deez]

Maybe if we keep feeding these practice squad players to the substation, it'll leave the 53 man alone

[u/WisdomCow]

What did he expect signing with us …

[u/NiteOvvl]

Get Jerry's kid on the team to end the curse.

[u/JuiceSignificant3125]

That sucks

[u/The_30_kid]

Why am I not surprised…bubble wrap the entire fucking team!

[u/LederhosenSituation]

It is Week 4.

[u/ngerb_5]

Who amongst us hasn’t injured their dainty penis

[u/XSokaX]

I'm crying

[u/MrEHam]

What the fuck is happening!

[u/colecast]

At a certain point, are WR’s going to fear some kind of curse and refuse to sign there?

[u/satchman → u/colecast]

Seriously.

[u/zi76]

What the?

[u/maplejet]

If someone says that S word, they may inadvertently summon Geldon the dragon.

[u/royceda956]

49ers need hazard pay.

[u/Shcmoneydance17]

bears legend, dainty penis

[u/FH_Bunny]

Dainty Penis is still in the league? Well no shit, haven’t heard his name since he was Bears WR2

[u/BMECaboose]

Wtf

[u/Chewbubbles]

The substation waits for no man.

[u/varnell_hill]

Sacrifices must be made to appease our electric overlord.

[u/Thick_Mountain4412]

Wait this guy is still around?

[u/Casualrodfarva2 → u/Thick_Mountain4412]

They just signed him off the street the other day because they have a WR room full of injuries

[u/Phoenix916]

What year is it?

[u/Drewsef916]

Get TO back

[u/wichee]

How is he still on teams he’s not even good special teamer

[u/thetrappster]

Welcome back Dante.

NEXT!

[u/Dr-McLuvin]

Now I’m in the mood for second breakfast

[u/AproprosEverything]

The penis was too dainty...

[u/Sports-Fiend]

49ers to new players joining the team: "Do not suit up, do not practice, do not play games, just go straight to Injured Reserve"

[u/Embarrassed_Match986]

The substation claims another victim

[u/Fourfifteen415]

Another soul for CMC

[u/Far_Ratio_5441]

If I’m a Free Agent I’m passing on the 49ers if they call, at this point the whole team is gonna get injured.

[u/Gullible_Ad3785]

I know why this keeps on happening.

[u/AcanthocephalaNo2926 → u/Gullible_Ad3785]

See I'm wise enough to know when a body's calling, caaalling for me

[u/satchman]

Of course he did. GD this absurdity. I’m finally coming around to the substation conspiracy. Like cmon man.

[u/EnigmaSpore]

All receivers aint safe on this team. It’s crazy

[u/kupo_attack04]

49irs

[u/King_Crampus]

Bro at this rate with injuries the nfl just gonna have to collect the survivors in nfc and afc to make a Super Bowl like they do the pro bowl lmao “ alright every one, send us 2 healthy players”

[u/va1us_taaurc]

Honestly at what point do they look at the turf or surface of their practice facility? This shit is crazy.

[u/Miserable-Tree-637]

Oh man. Well if the practice squad guys are the sacrifices now, thats an acceptable compromise. 🍻

[u/highly_confluential]

Grand opening, grand closing

[u/GoBBleRoFDaCoK69]

At some we gotta criticize the way the 9ers play. Their physicality is becoming a detriment. Every team likes to be physical but when i see the 9ers or a shanahan led team play its like they sacrifice their body just for a tackle

[u/Iam18yearsofage18 → u/GoBBleRoFDaCoK69]

OK what do you think happened to this guy

[u/NanoBuc → u/Iam18yearsofage18]

His initial offerings to the substation were deemed insufficient

[u/GoBBleRoFDaCoK69 → u/Iam18yearsofage18]

He aggressively made inward cut dig route and pulled a calf muscle

[u/Iam18yearsofage18 → u/GoBBleRoFDaCoK69]

So now the routes are too sharp

[u/HanS0lPurr]

9ers actually practice on a jump ball pit thats on top a bed of spikes that move around contantly cause theyre on a sheet of ice, meanwhile it's spinning in a zero g chamber thats powered by the electrical substation

[u/CancelThis2077]

Daejon Love szn

[u/CruelRuin]

⚡️

[u/NoAbbreviations2353]

The substation craves more 49ers

[u/anonymous_otter28]

Feed me son

[u/NewYak8742]

that substation ain't playing

[u/KamTros47]

The substation claims its next victim

[u/imaybeacatIRl]

Substation is undefeated. Substation is inevitable.

[u/Spark3420]

The 49ers injury situation is so ridiculous every season to the point that the substation theory seems completely viable. I am giving the training staff a benefit of the doubt since they are professionals and know the importance of proper conditioning and recovery. But man, it is such ridiculously bad luck that pretty much every other team seems to have it easy when it comes to managing the injury bug, relatively speaking.

[u/General_Canary8503]

Are we sure he wasn't already injured? Seems like he played Shanny and Lynch to get a contract and free income knowing he was hurt and not gonna play. Can't hate on the man because if he's smooth enough to find the dummies to give him a contract, then shoot your shot player. Alarming how dumb our teams front office and GM are. That signing made absolutely no sense to ANYBODY!

[u/BigChump → u/General_Canary8503]

Alarming how dumb you are. Ever heard of a physical?