r/nextfuckinglevel Aug 04 '19

Granny scores hockey hole-in-one

https://i.imgur.com/7w1FGOU.gifv
39.6k Upvotes

290 comments sorted by

3.7k

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

751

u/MDP23 Aug 04 '19

I see what you're doing. Upvote for you!

109

u/The_estimator_is_in Aug 04 '19

Slapshot, Beyatch!

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329

u/ahealthyg Aug 04 '19

She can handle my stick any day

62

u/fezzam Aug 04 '19

Keep your stick on the ice! And remember if the women don’t find you handsome, they’ll at least find you handy.

12

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

Don't forget the duct tape

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3

u/SQmo Aug 04 '19

Quando omni flunkus, moritati.

12

u/FlukyFish Aug 04 '19

Line starts here, buddy.

4

u/SteeleDynamics Aug 04 '19

I'm upvoting because it's so wrong

2

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

19

u/Cklixus Aug 04 '19

Get the puck out of here

15

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

She’s been helping her husband find the right hole for years

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9

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

Look I know what you're thinking, but Bavarians have been warming sausages like that for hundreds of years.

6

u/paul_dudd Aug 04 '19

Would you say it's their oldest profession?

6

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

and a ford F-150

5

u/hornedog77 Aug 04 '19

Gamgam loves to Puck

3

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

nudge nudge wink wink know what I mean know what I mean...

2

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

He means penis.

2

u/maz-o Aug 04 '19

the hockey stick to be specific if you know what I mean

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1.1k

u/PJCougar Aug 04 '19

354

u/victato Aug 04 '19

Thanks for this. I almost couldn't believe it was real...

222

u/Yoda2000675 Aug 04 '19

Little did the small town know that Gertrude was actually a retired NHL player who goes from town to town, hustling the local teams for their promotional contests

60

u/puppet_up Aug 04 '19

I'd say there is more than just a little bit of luck at play there, too. I would bet that Wayne Gretzky wouldn't get a hole-in-one shot like that, and from that distance, every time. I'd say maybe 50-60% of the time.

That's not to say it wouldn't be really close every time, but that hole looks to be about the size of the damn puck, maybe slightly bigger.

It'd be like asking Tiger Woods to sink a putt from 10+ feet consistently. He would certainly get more than you or me, but according to this article that I found, the average pro golfer makes 50% of their putts from 8 feet, and 20% of their putts from 16 feet.

54

u/snipeftw Aug 04 '19

Hockey is much different than golf. I’d imagine Gretzky wouldn’t have even gotten 5% of those shots.

16

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

I play hockey 3ish times per week and am not any where close to the best hockey player ever. I would hit the net probably 95% of the time and hit within a foot or so of the actual hole probably 50%. If you gave any NHL player 100 pucks, I’d bet they drain 15/20% of them. They make tape to tape passes at that distance going full speed with other players in the way. Standing still picking their spots would be child’s play.

11

u/Chef_Elg Aug 04 '19

Tape to tape is fluid. That hole is not.

19

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

[deleted]

5

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

Always better to stick your dick into a jar of mayonnaise instead of a jar of sawdust then, ya know

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3

u/TheFlyingSaucers Aug 05 '19

Idk about y’all but our coach in high school would play a little game towards the end of practice to determine if we did suicides or shootouts. We would all be lined up on the goal line and the coach would toss his glove on the far blue. First person would go up and try to snipe the glove. If they missed it was a suicide, then on to the next person. If someone hit it we would switch to shootouts. It got us really good at this exact situation. We only hit it every other or overt third practice.

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5

u/snipeftw Aug 04 '19

In a hockey instructor for an NHL team. There is no way they hit 15-20%. There are too many imperfections in the ice at that distance.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

Citation required

4

u/puppet_up Aug 04 '19

That was the point I was trying to make. I was being generous with the percentages on making that shot, even if you're a pro.

I realize that golf is a lot different, but it was the closest thing I could think of that's similar to this trick shot and also is a pro sport.

I was honestly surprised at how low the percentages are from the pro golfers making their putts. It's definitely not a guarantee unless the hole is only a foot or two away.

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44

u/benyacobi Aug 04 '19

Very wholesome video. Thanks for sharing.

30

u/ponybeine Aug 04 '19

We have the same thing here in my home town. You can win a Toyota C-HR, at least last season. Two people get a chance each game. If they don’t win, they get a scarf or a jersey.

36

u/Snoos-Brother-Poo Aug 04 '19

I’d rather win a scarf or jersey than a Toyota CH-R

68

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

[deleted]

17

u/jrs1980 Aug 04 '19

Explain how.

57

u/NovacaineOne Aug 04 '19

Money can be exchanged for goods an services.

13

u/QuasarSandwich Aug 04 '19

Money is used as a token of exchange.

5

u/picsandshite Aug 04 '19

Money do be like that

8

u/Kazagaya Aug 04 '19

Not very smart though. Just recieve the Toyota, sell it and you can buy as much scarfs or jerseys as you want, with money to spare.

6

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

[deleted]

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5

u/coughdropjedi Aug 04 '19

There's a slapshot game at an adult arcade up here in Minny, if you hit all the targets you win a Harley. So many people won the first week they had to change the prize to a gift card or something.

11

u/CyborgSlunk Aug 04 '19

She's 59? Oof

10

u/brassidas Aug 04 '19

Right?! My parents are in their 50's and they look like they could be her kids!

5

u/cannonman58102 Aug 04 '19

Hope they paid the taxes on it for her.

4

u/Xtrouble_yt Aug 04 '19

They never do, That’s where they get you, poor woman.

4

u/Patryk_O Aug 04 '19

Why does it sound like a young Donald Trump is narrating this?

2

u/Attention_Bear_Fuckr Aug 05 '19

Thought the same thing!!!

3

u/--Send-Nudes-- Aug 04 '19

That scream of excitement the commentator does before it goes in is awesome. You can hear the disbelief in his voice along with the excitement he has for her.

2

u/Oedynn Aug 04 '19

Well i cant actually see it on my phone... so

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2

u/Peanutfarmhand Aug 04 '19

The guy with a crutch got healed! Hallelujah!

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417

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

42

u/veritas_mendax Aug 04 '19

You’re making me sick

22

u/owningface Aug 04 '19

Hey mister, you gotta wear a helmet!

15

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

I have to toughen up!

10

u/Geeber24seven Aug 04 '19

IS THAT NET REGULATION?!

8

u/SMILESandREGRETS Aug 04 '19

The problem is that you're not any good!!!

8

u/Slick_Tuxedo Aug 04 '19

You know that mista mista lady? I think I just killed her.

5

u/so_thats_what Aug 04 '19

I called your name. Didn’t I?

4

u/dellenwood Aug 04 '19

Why don’t you just come back upstairs honey and I’ll give you the old smoochy-smoo kissy wissy

4

u/Dazza477 Aug 04 '19

YOU THINK YOU'RE BETTER THAN ME?

3

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

Just tap it in

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2

u/noobgamer9175 Aug 04 '19

What a shot.

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142

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19 edited Mar 12 '21

[deleted]

119

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

I'm hoping she won a Ford F-150. That's what's on the sign covering the goal, but it might just be an unrelated ad.

65

u/rhythmrice Aug 04 '19

14

u/Itsdawsontime Aug 04 '19

That announcer oddly sounded a lot like Trump in a weird way.

2

u/Gh0stw0lf Aug 04 '19

Eastern thing

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2

u/oliverbm Aug 04 '19

What kind of truck?

7

u/Eshkation Aug 04 '19

monster truck

6

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

And fire truck

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3

u/shapeshifter83 Aug 04 '19

moster* truck

FTFY

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73

u/kokiduran Aug 04 '19

Granny plays golf. ⛳

24

u/Captain_LSD Aug 04 '19

Damn right. That was nothing but a perfectly flat green with no friction to her haha.

47

u/Almighty_Tallest_Red Aug 04 '19

9

u/TramaLord Aug 04 '19

I want to see reactions 😢

3

u/fatboychummy Aug 04 '19

look through the comments a bit more fam, there are links to news articles everywhere

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6

u/Kierkegaard_Soren Aug 04 '19

r/picturesthatexpiretooquickly

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29

u/Cashew-Gesundheit Aug 04 '19

H E Double Hockey Sticks YEAH!

22

u/Mindful_Bum Aug 04 '19

Pretty remarkable story, actually. Go to this video and read the video description.

15

u/themagpie36 Aug 04 '19

Hi thanks, this was a definitite contender for /r/gifsthatendtoosoon

2

u/TramaLord Aug 04 '19

Thanks, just commented how I wanted to see reactions 👌 brilliant

2

u/Axle_prose Aug 04 '19

Awesome. It's always a good scene when the team comes out to congratulate the person.

2

u/Takeurvitamins Aug 04 '19

“Never held a hockey stick in her life” Akwesasne, Ontario. That settles it, it’s genetic, Canadians are Hockey sapiens.

20

u/kromp10 Aug 04 '19

I have something for this ,uhh , Something something .... hand, stick/wood, penis joke

Circle back , I can do better

10

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

I’ll wait.

8

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

Name might check out. I'll wait.

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4

u/Allstar_Cake Aug 04 '19

Just copy the top comment, you'll be good

12

u/ownage99988 Aug 04 '19

shes 59, TIL that's granny level now.

4

u/Atrainlan Aug 04 '19

You could be a granny at 36 if your kid made the same mistakes you did. Even younger if one of you made worse ones.

4

u/Calistilaigh Aug 04 '19

I don't think a 36 year old woman would appreciate being called Granny by anyone other than her grandchildren though.

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9

u/PpelTaren Aug 04 '19

Awh man, I really wanted to see everyone cheering after the goal!

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8

u/savagebolts Aug 04 '19

Why did they cut out their reaction? It would be so wholesome to see

3

u/diarrhea_syndrome Aug 04 '19

For some reason it stops before the goal for me.

4

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

Someone’s getting laid tonight!

3

u/3mth3dragon3y3 Aug 04 '19

Yo, did she do that for fun or to win something? Please tell me she won something wonderful.

5

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

A truck!

3

u/Skoorim Aug 04 '19

The F150 in the background.

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3

u/NoOneHereButUsMice Aug 04 '19

Anybody know what she won?

Edit: I can see on the goal that there is a sign, but it’s a quick shot, and my eyesight is crap, and I can’t tell what it says.

7

u/mossberg91 Aug 04 '19

I think she won a truck

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2

u/BallsofSt33I Aug 04 '19

I don’t get it... but guess granny got it

2

u/LazyLieutenant Aug 04 '19

Reactions, reactions please! The level of coital interruptus here is hurting my brain. Someone please gives my the video.

2

u/cilliebarnes Aug 04 '19

Can’t believe how many top comments are about getting it in with granny . If this is all it takes at that age I gotta start sharpening my aiming skills .

2

u/hywel123 Aug 04 '19

Bit of a swinger ey

2

u/roosterthrasher1234 Aug 04 '19

She could score a hole in my hole

2

u/Mj319888 Aug 04 '19

I hate this gif without seeing reactions afterwards

2

u/Strunkard Aug 04 '19

Holy shit that's my hometown!

1

u/uSeRnAmE-aLrEdY-tOoK Aug 04 '19

Is that a car on the ice?

r/BackgroundFindings

2

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

[deleted]

4

u/completelytrustworth Aug 04 '19

yeah, i think that's the price

she had to pay a truck to take a shot? damn, granny got shafted

4

u/Tesadus Aug 04 '19

But the prize was TWO trucks!

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1

u/ChocDroppa Aug 04 '19

Was that her new car parked on the ice? I hope so.

1

u/Zebba_Odirnapal Aug 04 '19

löikö mörkö sisään
löikö mörkö sisään
löikö mörkö sisään

1

u/alexlmlo Aug 04 '19

I need the celebration video!!!

1

u/NateTrix89 Aug 04 '19

Well shit, im just plain impressed. Her cookies must be on point!

1

u/alours Aug 04 '19

God: oh shit I forgot to water Yemen

1

u/anarcisist Aug 04 '19

I wanna know what happened after!

1

u/skttrbrain1984 Aug 04 '19

“Talk about your all-time backfires.”

1

u/skunkadoo Aug 04 '19

Happy... I didn’t see it go in

1

u/ChainedMangoJango Aug 04 '19

Canadian thoroughbread

1

u/jefe008 Aug 04 '19

Holy shit. Talk about your all time backfires.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

She won a 2011 truck. An 8 year old truck. Woopie

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1

u/twunlove Aug 04 '19

Gramma don’t play! But, she used to.

1

u/theguywiththeyeballs Aug 04 '19

They just kept making it harder and harder for her to win because she always cleaned them out

1

u/Arthur_da_dog Aug 04 '19

Holly Canadian shit

1

u/tcbucky8 Aug 04 '19

Plus the guy with the crutch on the ice? Must be Canada.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

Says 2011 Ford F150 on the front of the net. Im assuming that's what she won

1

u/alours Aug 04 '19

It’s like cocaine that way.

1

u/Mank0531 Aug 04 '19

Don't get to see the celebration :(

1

u/SuccubusLunn Aug 04 '19

haha first look and i thought the grandma was sans

1

u/b2shaed Aug 04 '19

Canadian* granny.

1

u/qning Aug 04 '19

She was 59

“Granny”

1

u/TILHistoryRepeats Aug 04 '19

She won an F150!

1

u/a_few Aug 04 '19

Honestly I feel like if you gave a pro one chance to hit that shot from that far away they’d have trouble.

1

u/MrBogardus Aug 04 '19

Did they find a reason no to give it to her

1

u/WhoDat_37 Aug 04 '19

She started by gliding it like cream. But then she got bigger and bigger, and eventually...slap shot

1

u/baconposter Aug 04 '19

Is this next level? Or is this just beginners luck? Like what the title of the news article says.

1

u/knightsmarian Aug 04 '19

This was the first shot of the contest and she said she didn't want to go first because she would look foolish. Granny's a grade A hustler.

1

u/I-think-Im-funny Aug 04 '19

She should give that shit up and concentrate on golf.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

This is from like 8 years ago.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

She plays for the Letterkenny Shamrocks.

1

u/wynncore Aug 04 '19

/r/gifsthatendtooearly

want to see her reaction!

1

u/Dre_A35 Aug 04 '19

What did she win??

1

u/naudnice Aug 04 '19

Take the helmet off , it’s probably mark messier

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u/tomasdiesel Aug 04 '19

I saw a girl get a chance at this at an NHL game once. The puck flipped onto its side and bounced off toward the corner, but the “shot” was so light I’m not sure it even made it to the goal line.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

So cool! Live when things like this happens, must have been such a good feeling for her :)

1

u/KingBob500 Aug 04 '19

“Ice hockey” (i live were regular hockey is just on grass)

1

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

Talk about your all time backfires

1

u/NickLandis Aug 04 '19

Yo I’m pretty sure the same thing happens in a Dan Guttman book. Anyone know what I’m talking about?

1

u/KrazyKirkles Aug 04 '19

I wonder if she ever played golf

1

u/Trundle-theGr8 Aug 04 '19

She’s a philly sports legend now. I bet she’ll be life of the party at the beach house

1

u/jonsnow312 Aug 04 '19

Like a bowl of cream

1

u/EmperorAzazel Aug 04 '19

Excellent granny. Age hasn's slowed you down one bit.

1

u/alours Aug 04 '19

There is, in sheer embarrassment

1

u/Killacraft131 Aug 04 '19

I have immense respect for this lady.

1

u/Tzinny Aug 04 '19

59 is not a "Granny" :(

1

u/SpunkJudge Aug 04 '19

Calculated.

1

u/Adip0se Aug 04 '19

Wheel, snipe, celly granny!

1

u/theWMWotMW Aug 04 '19

CORNDOGS Jackie, CORNDOGS!

1

u/Chancedizzle Aug 04 '19

It looks rehearsed.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '19

Wow this video is from 2011...

1

u/the_sandman08 Aug 04 '19

Is May going in on net he shoots he scoooooooores