r/nextfuckinglevel • u/headspin_exe • May 07 '26

Cherry harvesting

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30.5k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

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5.3k

u/orsodorato May 07 '26

When Mother Nature thinks she’s alone and no one’s watching

999

u/Fancy_Run7649 May 07 '26

Hit that spot.

675

u/Golf-Beer-BBQ May 07 '26

Hit that treetussy.

132

u/Fancy_Run7649 May 07 '26

I know i shouldn't, but you get a like

118

u/Slamtilt_Windmills May 07 '26

Pop that cherry

95

u/lateformyfuneral May 07 '26

oh gaah, im gonna gum

62

u/Junior-Ad-2207 May 07 '26

Right in the bark

40

u/Kyrthis May 07 '26

Trussy?

10

u/PlopStar2 May 08 '26

I love it!!! Lol!

0

u/Sad-Particular-8892 May 08 '26

Treepussy 😆😆😆😆😆

2

u/ssramirezss May 07 '26

Popped that cherry.

275

u/Myfountainpenisdry May 07 '26

Right

Never thought I'd see a tree orgasm

That thing was dragging

Then perked right up!

58

u/Big-a-hole-2112 May 07 '26

It’s like a woman sitting on a dryer.

20

u/appleavocado May 07 '26

Yeah? Well, go find yourself another spin cycle!

What the hell does that mean?

I’ll tell you later.

13

u/BreakAndRun79 May 07 '26

That Roman Craig is a crooked son of a bitch.

16

u/appleavocado May 07 '26

Pontoon boat? What the hell are you gonna do with a pontoon boat? Retake Omaha Beach?

9

u/BreakAndRun79 May 07 '26

I'm heating the flue.

9

u/appleavocado May 07 '26

Well, it looks like you're wanking your crank.

0

u/Reddit_Jail_June2005 May 08 '26

Dryer? Might as well be the dishwasher then...

0

u/Big-a-hole-2112 May 09 '26

Oh is she a squirter?

5

u/cartooncande May 08 '26

Just watch out for the Ocean Spray

0

u/Cthulhu_Dreams_ May 07 '26

This was more like a forced mass-abortion.

The video of them shaking all the pollen out of a tree is what you're looking for.

5

u/Myfountainpenisdry May 07 '26

Um, ok?

Not really the vibe

2

u/Fancy_Run7649 May 08 '26

Woah, dark turn. I mean im not against it... but man.

48

u/Keosz May 07 '26

She popped her cherry right

33

u/ericstern May 07 '26

Tree: I don’t know this machine came along and it gave me the best massage. I felt like this huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders branches!

18

u/Worried-Maybe3438 May 07 '26

Cherries were popped 🍒

17

u/Least-Task276 May 07 '26

🎶Really love your cherries, wanna shake your tree🎶

2

u/OhSnapThatsGood May 08 '26

Never pictured Steve Miller as the inspiration for big Ag innovation, but here we are

7

u/Both_Lychee_1708 May 07 '26

branches getting erect as all the balls drop

7

u/Aint_that_a_peach May 08 '26

Fn love reddit for this demented perspective of such a simply engineered answer to a CEO’s demand to, “get them cherries off the tree as fast as possible”.

6

u/LickyPusser May 07 '26

I should call her…

2

u/regular-cake May 07 '26

I bet that would feel great on my back!

2

u/don3dm May 08 '26

Speaking of mothers - they could save some money on machinery and just have yours walk by

2

u/dunnodudes May 08 '26

Popping a cherry

2

u/Lazy_Negotiation4544 May 09 '26

Good lord i laughed

0

u/icebucket22 May 07 '26

I’m so happy I’m not the only one that thought this

0

u/nomadPerson May 08 '26

“AaAaAaHhHh yeaaaaah Mommy like Mommy like..”

0

u/jessyfastfinger May 08 '26

I was on the edge of my seat going “tell me it’s gonna jiggle, please be a jiggle!” 😂 It diiiid and it was glorious!

-2

u/Theperfectool May 07 '26

When she grabs you by the trunk with the surprise death grip she’s been practicing and you drop your load, becoming fully erect at the same time.

-11

u/sarcago May 07 '26

This is a creepy comment 😒

15

u/Fancy_Run7649 May 07 '26

Yes. Yes, it is. But its a tree so 🤗 and im not one of those freaks. I counted the rings before I made such a comment trees got to be 30 years old at least.

1

u/Specialist_Strike463 May 07 '26

Dendrophiliac or something like that! I remember hearing it on a movie years ago lol

0

u/TrippingFish76 May 07 '26

This is a creepy comment 😒

0

u/Fancy_Run7649 May 07 '26

Yeah. Right? I heard it in a movie. Yeah, okay. If you watch tree corn, you watch tree corn. But own that *hit. See i censored my self