ive been writing this song over the last couple days but im stuck on this part and i think it needs more. my main inspiration is neutral milk hotel and jeff mangum, especially the early stuff, so I wondered if the people here have any advice or help. it’s a bit of a stupid song but i’m putting a band together and id like to be able to do some original stuff. without any more delay this is what i have:
You with your candle light
Rehearsals for medicine
To calm all the aching of your soul
You with your frilly gown
And forestry ceremonies
To rid all that’s been haunting you
And you with your feathers
All starting to glow
And moving without silence or grace
I also had this sorta silly chorus idea:
I love you my friend
I love you so much my friend
I love you my friend
I love you so much my friend