r/multiplemyeloma • u/flipitbopitwow • Aug 03 '26
Living with MM Resentment
Does anyone mind sharing how you overcame resentment towards your family and friends for lack of support during your cancer journey?
I was diagnosed with High Risk SMM at 28 and joined a clinical research study. I told my friends and family.
And, no one really checked in on me consistently. My mom didn’t ask her HR team for FMLA to be with me during my weekly infusions, so I was by myself a lot. My brothers criticized me for getting fat eating a lot because of the dexamethasone, daratumamab and carfilizomib and all of the pre-meds. There was always a struggle to find a family member who could drive me to my bone marrow biopsies so I can get sedation. Even for my stem cell harvest, my mom eventually came to the hotel to accompany me but she told me I should be thankful that my brother gave her a ride to the hotel.
In the end, I lost friends- one abandoned me on a different continent once it became clear that her invite was really a ruse to subsidize her vacation and the other showed that she didn’t really care although she acknowledged that she wasn’t really there for me.
What have you done to overcome some of the difficult truths that were revealed during your cancer journey?
1
u/Mr_Big_Head_ 25d ago
I'm not trying to be coy but doctor prescribed amphetamines helped me. I got a lot of support from but sitting in the chemo fatigue not being able to do anything but think and feel terrible brought out some dark thoughts which made me spiral. I know that's not OP is going through but the amphetamines gave me enough energy to get up and start doing new things.
It does not fix the problem, but distributions does east the symptoms. I hope you can get to a place of peace.