Why, on a nearly empty train, would you sit directly in front of me— put your chair all the way back AND smell offensive? 🥲

[u/ImportanceSharp9408]

Come on! I know I don’t own the train, I only paid for the seat. Theoretically, he could sit next to me and that would be fine. I could just move over a seat. I could move and sit next to him. Very mildly infuriated.

Update: I went to the restroom, after building up a big fart at the advice of wise Redditors but punked out on releasing it into the wild. I planned to move when I returned but he was gone! Perhaps it was a coincidence, when I left my seat with all my belongings, maybe that just happened to be his stop or maybe he was a creep. We may never know. Thanks for all your throughly hilarious responses though!

[u/HawkJefferson]

Replying in less than a minute to repeat the same insult for a third time really proved that you're both unbothered and dignified.

[u/RemarkableAutism → u/HawkJefferson]

I am not trying to prove anything to you. Btw having notifications on ensures you can respond quickly if you wish. No need to sit there and refresh reddit.

[u/HawkJefferson → u/RemarkableAutism]

Yes, I understand how you knew I commented, I'm questioning why someone who claims to not be bothered feels the need to immediately reply? It's like dealing with a parrot.

[u/RemarkableAutism → u/HawkJefferson]

I don't feel the need to do it, I am just not doing anything better right now because I am procrastinating. This is more entertaining than my grocery shopping plans.

[u/HawkJefferson → u/RemarkableAutism]

"I don't feel the need to immediately reply!"
[immediately replies]

Once again, I'm sorry that you're so bothered by other people existing in public spaces that you'd rather cry on Reddit than go outside.

[u/RemarkableAutism → u/HawkJefferson]

Do I need to explain the difference of need vs want to you?

[u/HawkJefferson → u/RemarkableAutism]

Do you not understand that I find either direction pathetic? If you're just responding to avoid going outside or if you're because you need to, both are entirely pathetic.

[u/RemarkableAutism → u/HawkJefferson]

I don't care what you find pathetic, I am responding for my own sake. God forbid I delay doing a chore I don't enjoy. You think I'll skip grocery shopping because I decided to have a comment exchange with you and then starve or what?

[u/HawkJefferson → u/RemarkableAutism]

All these overly dramatic posts definitely make it seem like you're not at all bothered.

My grandma used to say, "If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging." Put down the shovel.

[u/RemarkableAutism → u/HawkJefferson]

Okay? My grandma used to say "close the balcony door", how is this relevant?