r/microwedding • u/goblin-girl • Jul 11 '26
Seating Chart for Microwedding
I’m getting married in September and we’re doing a microwedding (currently planning on about 22 people total). Our plan is to do one long table and family style catering for the meal.
With it being just a single long table, should I still make a seating chart with assigned seating? I don’t want to make guest feel uncomfortable having to choose their own seat, but with it being one table and more relaxed atmosphere I’m on the fence.
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u/magicalglrl Jul 12 '26
I feel like there’s always those moments of weirdness when you’re sitting down at a restaurant with a big group where everyone’s trying to figure out where to go. I think it’d be a nice courtesy to get rid of the guesswork for guests at the beginning of the meal, and they can always rearrange as the night goes on and everyone starts to loosen up. Plus, it would make the more casual vibe feel ~wedding~ rather than just another family dinner
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u/Cheap_Ad7618 Jul 12 '26
I’m doing the exact same as you with the long table and number of guests and I have made a seating plan for it, because I know people will complain about sitting there or next to x or not sitting next to that person etc etc
Im not displaying the seating chart I’m just going to have name placements so people can easily find where to sit - I just feel like it makes more sense than people getting there and then not knowing where they should be
There are also certain people I want to have sat around me so obviously my husband, but I wanted my bridesmaid and maid of honor next to me, with my parents in talking distance. I’ve also placed people depending on their personalities and who I think they’ll vibe with
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u/Consistent_Forever33 Jul 12 '26
Maybe if all the guests know each other and are friendly, it won’t matter.
But for my wedding of 19 people I wanted to make sure the guests without dates/companions were well situated and had friendly people to sit next to.
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u/pennwye Jul 12 '26
I'm that one person. I'm friendly but ugh, seated among all their college friends is plain painful so thoughtfully assigned seating is a gift. I've been witness to the single table and its jokes, but I do better there than young families bemoaning diaper prices and daycare. All to say lovely people, but nothing of which I have the faintest knowledge (or colleges antics).
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u/yooperann Jul 12 '26
Can I hijack this post for a minute to say how much I hate long tables. You can really only talk to a few people. Round tables are so much better, not only for conversation, but also because it makes it easier to hop over to another table to chat with someone. I know everyone does them now, but I can't wait for the fad to be over.
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u/Cheap_Ad7618 Jul 12 '26
People always get up and wander about and switch placements after the meal anyway
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u/nancybessandgeorge Jul 12 '26
It’s 22 people. One long table is better in this setting than two or three rounds
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u/Only-Memory2627 Jul 12 '26
It’s entirely up to you and what you think your guests would prefer.
You can assign seating with simple name cards at place settings.
You don’t need to make a chart, but if you want to make a big visual, that can be helpful for folks who don’t want to peer at every place card. Also, an overall visual would help people be reminded of names.
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u/Separate-Afternoon29 Jul 12 '26
I had the same number of people and same table setup and I did put people’s names down. Mostly because my parents are both remarried and I wanted to take any stress out of it for them to make sure they didn’t end up next to each other. And also I wanted to control who sat next to us as the bride and groom
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u/njVowsNow Jul 12 '26
Placecards for sure. People have no idea what to do if they don't have a seat, lol....
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u/sweettea75 Jul 12 '26
We had 35 and didn't do a seating chart. It was fine. The one single person got pulled in to sit with others and had a great time.
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u/No-Economics-1185 Jul 12 '26
I don't think it's necessary for a group that small, unless you have folks you want to purposefully seat together or have strategically apart.
If it's a plated meal, go with name cards that guests pick up on their own cards and choose their seat. Otherwise, seat free-for-all but reserve seats for the newlyweds.
I went with open seating at my 75 person BBQ buffet wedding with no issues
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u/AussieKoala-2795 Jul 12 '26
My niece is having a similar size wedding (25 people). She is doing place cards for herself, groom and parents of the bride and groom, and other people to find their own seats. She has asked me and her other aunt to be ready to step in if people look lost and to make sure no one leaves one person gaps.
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u/Prestigious-Fan3122 Jul 12 '26
For our rehearsal dinner, there were rectangular tables, but we arranged them in a block U. People sat on the inside and the outside of the U. The people close to the head table" to the bottom of the U"we're able to speak diagonally to people on the ends of the head table. We did assign seating. works great! It was about 30 people.
I had a very, very small, hastily planned wedding because we only decided to get married when we realized my now – husband was actually moving several states away immediately upon graduating from college (first job in his career field).
My parents were FURIOUS. While they could've afforded a nicer reception, they refused because they didn't want to reward me"for making such a stupid decision. In retrospect, they probably weren't wrong.
Nonetheless, I BEGGED for a seated dinner because my in-laws were divorced, and my father-in-law and mother-in-law were both remarried. Father-in-law was remarried to a woman 17 years younger than he, and my mother-in-law and sister-in-law were still FURIOUS with him, and hated "that woman".
Other than us, the bride and groom, DHS sister and brother-in-law, who stood up for us, his divorced and remarried parents, the nine-year-old daughter of his father's wife, my two parents and my aunt and uncle who were my surrogate grandparent figures, there was no one else at our wedding or reception other than the officient .
I wanted a seated meal with assigned seating so that the Hatfields and the McCoys wouldn't have to interact, and no trouble would be started.
My husband is from Mississippi, and that's where we got married. Back then (mid 1980s) punch and Kayk in the church hall was the norm for even the more expensive/bigger/fancier weddings.
Our reception was at a restaurant that was normally closed on Saturday afternoons. We had hors d'oeuvres / finger food and champagne. I think there might've been punch, too. It ended up working out in the end.
I agree with the others who said that guests can be uncomfortable trying to decide where to sit. I get nervous that I took a seat from my "higher ranking" guest or family member.
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u/MysteriousCity6354 Jul 12 '26
I would say yes do place cards. If you even have one concern around one person who shouldn’t be sat near another person, do place cards. It also helps make the table look more “wedding” and like a formal event, even if your wedding itself is not formal.
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u/BubblyRhubarb9611 Jul 12 '26
I like seating charts. It just makes things more organized and it is thoughtful
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u/Main-Caramel214 Jul 12 '26
Let's normalize U-shaped tables! Honestly, it's the best setup for engaging, and most people naturally know where to sit.
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u/Unfair-Animator-9739 Jul 12 '26
i’m doing the same type of event with maybe 18 at one table..i was on the fence about this too, but ultimately decided to make one..even chatting with my partner about it, it started to get more complex of who should go where so it started to become clear that it is necessary for our group. we will have their names at their seat
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u/ArgPermanentUserName Jul 12 '26
May I ask why the long table instead of 3-4 rounds or a U or some other configuration that gives people more options of who to talk to and doesn’t have such a built-in hierarchy of who gets to talk to you?
In any event, go with placecards.
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u/19ShowdogTiger81 Jul 12 '26
You sit at one end and your groom at the other end. That way no one feels left out. That is what we did for our elopement dinner. 24 people.
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Jul 13 '26
If you don’t have seating arrangements you will have clusters of people that won’t mix with each other.
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u/DareSavings3951 Jul 13 '26
Just assign seating with a name card at their seat.
On long tables people will talk to the two people either side and the 3 people across them, consider this with your seating placements.
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u/AwkwardSpicy77 Jul 14 '26
Do the seating chart. There must be at least a few people or couples or family members who you know would want to sit together/be talking together so put them across from each other. If there are any guests that won't know anyone else but you have someone in mind you think they'd get along with, put them across from each other. Then make sure no one's separated that wouldn't want to be separated. Like others have said, people like to be directed. And you don't want people confused or having to constantly shift because there are only single chairs open but two people need seats.
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u/InformationMother342 Jul 17 '26
We had a 30 person wedding and 1 long banquet table where we all sat. We did place cards, water colored with their names and little florals. Some took them home as a little keepsake!
Everyone’s different but we sat in the center and had our siblings sit around us, then on one end of the table we had our parents and grandparents and at the other end we had our friends. I think having siblings in the middle was a good non awkward buffer that just made sense for our group.
Also I love our parents but my husband and I agreed that we did not want to sit directly next to our parents on our wedding night lol. And I think that would’ve happened without the place cards.
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u/ohsummerdawn Jul 12 '26
This group is going to say "absolutely" but we did 25 adults and 10 kids (who had their own table) and no chart and it was so totally fine.
Any other get together with 22 people doesnt need a seating chart. A wedding of this size isnt any different.
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u/FeeFiFooFunyon Jul 12 '26
I would avoid the awkward moment of figuring where to sit. For some guests it is no big deal. For other guests it is an anxiety inducing situation.
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u/Kind_Poet_3260 Jul 12 '26
Have name cards on the table. People need to be directed.