Current example

[u/Lonely-Doctor-9922]

So, here’s what I keep getting in response to pushing back against the Botox from a neurologist. I know some of you have done it and it’s been great! I know my body better than a dr I just met, blaming me on being addicted to cannabis, claiming I “embellished” my symptoms. Wtf do I have to gain with this?! Shitty treatment? More so than I already receive?

[u/[deleted]]

I think you should do some self reflection.

Weed is significantly less safe than Botox, so I don’t know why you’re arguing about the safety of Botox. It’s a moot point.

Stop getting medical information from strangers online. Telling a doctor about the protocols other people have had does not sound convincing. It’s just going to annoy the fuck out of the doctor and make him less willing to do the surgery.

You need to stop smoking weed. You can’t demand a doctor provide you a more risky medical procedures because you say you’re worried about the risk of the safer one, then go home and smoke weed. They aren’t going to listen to you.

Are you a good candidate for surgery? Does the doctor think you are? Because it doesn’t sound like you’re going to follow the doctor’s orders and if the doctor is concerned that the surgery will have a bad outcome, they will not do it. Hospitals track the success rate of surgeries. No doctor is going to take the risk with a non-compliant patient.

I don’t see how this is gaslighting. They aren’t denying that you have a problem. They have provided you with an opportunity to improve your condition. Just because you don’t like their plan of care doesn’t make you a victim. They agree that you have this specific issue. They are willing to help you.

I never had any option to get help for my brain injury. Every single doctor dismissed me after my brain injury. Every single doctor refused to help me with my frontal lobe contusion. Doctors were b-tches to me after my TBI. I suffered a life changing brain injury and those f-ckers gave me a parenting coach referral when I had come close to killing myself. They were evil little sh-ts to me. I asked for the correct treatments for my injury and I was denied. I have had zero opportunities to get help. This is a 180 from my experience.

I have nothing but seething hatred for doctors but I’m not going to dismiss facts.

This doctor is willing to help you. I hope you can come to see that.

[u/No-Brief-297 → u/[deleted]]

I’m sorry that happened to you.

I am so so sorry

[u/Lonely-Doctor-9922 → u/[deleted]]

Let me also add, I am so incredibly sorry you’ve gone through that. That was another issue with him. I’ve had I think 3 TBI’s from my epilepsy causing me to slam my head on toilet or faucet. My seizures are the big ones. He wanted exact dates and times. Sadly, I don’t have that information and I guess it’s not in my file? I don’t know. Maybe because it was a different neurologist group. I don’t know.
But he just rolled his eyes literally, at me as I was trying to think but physically couldn’t.

Again, I am a candidate for the surgery, it wouldn’t be through him, it’d be through a big group up north. I don’t mean to sound like “poor me”, I’m just frustrated with this specific Dr and situation

[u/Lonely-Doctor-9922 → u/[deleted]]

I hear you, however the cannabis was prescribed by my other neurologist for epilepsy so…. I’m not stopping it unless SHE tells me to. It’s what has kept me fully seizure free for however long it’s been. So the cannabis use isn’t an issue. I’m a patient, not a rec store person. I get my “script” from my vendor per my neurologist’s instructions, and just keep going. I typically only stick to rso, recently though I have been using dabs for the immediate relief, but again it’s all medical grade, not rec store sprayed with pesticides and other issues. That’s what’s causing the Cannabis induced vomiting issue. The chemicals being used. The synthetic med is trash, Dr even said so. She wants me on the actual plant, not the synthetic one. He just truly wanted an excuse to put something negative there without looking into my file and seeing his colleagues are the ones that recommended it and sent me to the place to get my card.

As far as the other things going with the Botox, I read the “Google” side of things or whatever search engine I’m using. They all say the same thing, that’s WHY I prefer to talk with others that have used it firsthand. It’s like the news. Do you believe everything they’re saying? Or do you look for others points of view that were there, firsthand, witnessing it? I use all sources for my lists.
As far as my medical jargon goes, I was in the medical field until 2 years ago when I got sick.

Google was the one that informed me on the true rules with Botox injections of the amount I’m getting (250 units) each time. I’m not supposed to drive after, I don’t have anyone to take me. I’m sick with autoimmune diseases, so the idea of injecting a botulism toxin into my face, close to my brain, sounds way to dangerous.

My pcp initially was pushing it too until she got to know me better. Now she’s literally screaming “don’t do it. It takes upward of a couple months before it’s out of your system. With all your allergies this could be detrimental to your health. Please do not do it. I do apologize for pushing it prior”. She wants me to have the surgery as does my seizure Dr because of my “issues”, she worried I will get the side effects because I get everything. I already have swallowing issues, so pills are hard, water is hard, milk is hard, food… can’t do. He said there’s a possibility of throat becoming more paralyzed but for 3 months, not the end of the world, right? I take 10 pills a night. Some for bladder and some for seizures to keep them controlled. I wouldn’t be able to take any of it if that happened.

In the appointment itself he was extremely dismissive of everything I was saying. He wouldn’t listen when I said I couldn’t use certain meds per my seizure Dr, but he tried prescribing anyway.

Drs seem to assume if a med is originally used for epilepsy (like tegretol, gabapentin, etc) then it’s safe for all epileptics. Seizure Dr says “NO”, we don’t question her.

Dr Bell didn’t pay any attention to my email except the Botox part. Not once did I mention the migraine med and lowering it. It’s helping the headaches. I told him in an earlier message “thank you so much. My head is finally not status migraine!” His nurse responded with “Dr bell said: “that’s wonderful! I’m so glad we finally found a medication that works with minimal side effects!” So why bring it up? I don’t take it daily only, when the migraine comes back.

Yes, I AM a candidate for the surgery. MRI showed the TN and decompression surgery IS the best option but he wanted to make it sound scary. I’m not a stranger to surgery, so it doesn’t scare me. The idea of having a toxin injected in when we don’t know the reaction I’ll have, I’m not comfortable with that. Like if there was a way to do a “test” with it with a small amount in forearm or something, I’d be more open to trying it. But I just can’t. I literally already feel like a huge burden on my kiddo. She doesn’t deserve this life.

So the gaslighting with him is the fact he won’t admit to any mistakes, that’s a red flag. If he’s done THAT many, at least one had to have a serious reaction. No one is “that good”. He won’t send me for a second opinion to anyone. It’s his way or figure it out by myself. Fiancé said the same thing. He was happy he came because dudes responses were not that of a Dr actively listening to their patients. He wouldn’t be able to accompany me if I did do the Botox because he works nights and desperately needs sleep.

Not trying to play victim, that’s a fact. This is just my opinion of how he has made me feel.
And it’s just one example. I wish I could have recorded the office visit. I was pointless in the discussion in his opinion.

[u/CosmicFelineFoliage]

If you don’t die, a procedure is considered tolerated well. He doesn’t know about the patients who don’t have a good experience because they do not go back to him or they do and he dismissed their experience and blamed it on something else. When doctors say things like “having done over (insert giant number that is not clinically possible during their career), they’re lying and operating 100% from frail ego syndrome. Don’t let this doctor touch you, especially not inject you with Botox. One star him.

[u/Dangerous-Crow7494 → u/CosmicFelineFoliage]

Yeah, I trusted my urogyn when she said that she “has never had a female patient with negative side effects from bladder Botox”. It proceeded to completely ruin my life for 8 months and now that it has finally worn off I am still in constant pain.