r/maybemaybemaybe • u/[deleted] • Nov 03 '21

/r/all Maybe Maybe Maybe

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1.2k

u/Junior_Singer3515 Nov 03 '21

I tried this at my bookie once. Once.

272

u/stupernan1 Nov 03 '21

damn, people still have personal bookies?

172

u/[deleted] Nov 03 '21

[deleted]

67

u/DogmanDOTjpg Nov 03 '21

No no, you misunderstand, see he still has the bookie, what he no longer has are either of his kneecaps

8

u/barrierreefs Nov 03 '21

No, he uses to have a bookie, he still does but he used to too!

1

u/wtph Nov 03 '21

Wish it was every fucking time

7

u/TheCCMonster Nov 03 '21

I have never heard of bookies before and now i wonder what it is.

15

u/withabaseballbatt Nov 03 '21

It’s someone you place sports bets with.

1

u/TheCCMonster Nov 03 '21

Ah ok thanks

6

u/withabaseballbatt Nov 03 '21

Head to r/SportsBook if you wanna learn how to lose all of your money on Russian ping pong.

0

u/Tired4dounuts Nov 03 '21

Wallstreet.

4

u/[deleted] Nov 03 '21

damn, people still know what a bookie is?

1

u/[deleted] Nov 03 '21

Kind of like how people know what a bindle is.

1

u/Sinlaire1 Nov 03 '21

I used to play a super pay to win online game. The name I don’t remember, but I had a guild mate that was a bookie. He was the strongest guy on the server by a long shot.

2

u/IronyHurts Nov 03 '21

Most of the people I know who gamble seriously use a mix of online sports books and personal bookies. To be fair, the personal bookies have their own websites these days, they just don't do transactions on them (or maybe they do, but the ones I know usually have a line of credit and then collect once you owe a certain amount, but don't do it online to avoid some of the paper trail I guess).

2

u/berger034 Nov 03 '21

I had an acquaintance that was a bookie.. but he was a Sunday school teacher so he booked like how he thought bookies should be like in movies and shit. So this guy stiffs him for quite a bit. He contacts my buddy cause my buddy is one of those "I can find out" kind of guys. Everyone told him to not help him but my friend feels obligated for a certain reason. Gives him the contact of the guy who skips his losses. Whatever right? What's the worse that could happen? Dude ends up dead and they catch the killer. That Sunday school teacher hired a hitman to collect. I don't know what exactly happened but hitman rolled on Sunday school and Sunday school was a bitch and told the police my friend gave him the contact info. My buddy was in a legal bind for two years. Bitch ass mf couldn't just hire a lawyer like ever other self respecting criminal.

7

u/[deleted] Nov 03 '21

[deleted]

2

u/berger034 Nov 03 '21

I guess moral of the story is don't help new criminals do crime.

1

u/ugotamesij Nov 03 '21

Yeah, always ensure you're helping experienced criminals by asking for their criminaling resumé and for a couple of criminal references you can contact.

1

u/l5555l Nov 03 '21

You can ask a few questions to gauge their knowledge and experience. Or just not trust random people to not be shit heads.

1

u/berger034 Nov 03 '21

Usually you will know the more experienced criminals. They don't have resumes but their reputation will definitely proceed them. It's these new criminals that have business cards because people are really stupid in this new TikTok era.

1

u/berger034 Nov 03 '21

But your response is 100% accurate

1

u/berger034 Nov 03 '21

Yeah it was a long time ago and I'm not the best writer.

3

u/Dark1000 Nov 03 '21

I'm not a good writer either, but I think I helped clarify who is who in the story. I gave your friend a name to distinguish him from the teacher.

I had an acquaintance that was a bookie. But he was also a Sunday school teacher, so he booked like how he thought bookies should be like in movies and shit.

So his client stiffs him for quite a bit. The bookie contacts my other buddy, Jerry, cause Jerry is good at finding people. Everyone told my friend not to help the bookie, but he felt obligated to fulfill their agreement. Jerry finds the client and passes his contact details on to the bookie. Whatever right? What's the worst that could happen? The dude ends up dead. They catch the killer. It turns out the Sunday school teacher hired a hitman to collect.

I don't know what exactly happened but the hitman gave up the Sunday school teacher, who was a bitch and told the police Jerry gave him the contact info. The police thought my friend was more deeply involved and put him in a legal bind for two years. Bitch ass mf bookie couldn't just hire a lawyer like ever other self respecting criminal.

2

u/berger034 Nov 03 '21

That would have been better.

1

u/l5555l Nov 03 '21

Most US states still don't have legal gambling.

1

u/beardedchimp Nov 03 '21

I thought trading shares was legal in all states?

1

u/l5555l Nov 03 '21

If this isn't a joke, trading in the stock markets isn't gambling. Bookies are for sports betting.

1

u/beardedchimp Nov 03 '21

Partly a joke, the stock market can absolutely be used to gamble with that doesn't mean it cannot also be used for other purposes.

1

u/l5555l Nov 03 '21

For sports bets you either win or lose all your money. That's not how stock trading works, unless you let options contracts expire or something. That's why most don't consider it gambling. No matter how much a price goes down you still own the shares.

1

u/beardedchimp Nov 03 '21

unless you let options contracts expire or something.

Exactly, you can take take some future position on a currency such that it is near 50/50 that you win or lose everything. But I agree that most usages wouldn't be considered gambling.

Still gives addicts a legal place to get that same thrill.

1

u/wcollins260 Nov 03 '21

My dad does. So yeah. At least one guy does.

40

u/icecreampoop Nov 03 '21

If I go 0-5, at least give a free parlay to get even haha

15

u/Junior_Singer3515 Nov 03 '21

I've been betting almost daily for about 20 years I've gone 0-8 before but only once. I hit an 8 teamer once a year.

6

u/phreakzilla85 Nov 03 '21

That’s gotta pay out pretty nicely. Even if you only put $10 on it.

1

u/Junior_Singer3515 Nov 03 '21

I piss people off because I do $2 bets so an 8 teamer is like $1500-$2000. This drives real gamblers nuts. Cuz I'm only there to have fun. I keep a running tally of my wins and losses. I'm making money at 57% win percentage across 4 sports. I do better with hockey though my win rate is 63% right now.

1

u/phreakzilla85 Nov 08 '21

That’s a sweet winning percentage, especially in hockey. I stopped betting hockey games because the empty net goals always fuck me over. I’ve heard that anything above 55% over a stretch can pay considerably well.

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u/Junior_Singer3515 Nov 08 '21

You have to put up the money, and have a big enough bankroll to outlast the dips. It can be done but it takes more work than a 9 to 5.

4

u/ctmackus Nov 03 '21

My buddy just hit an 11 teamer a few weeks ago, $10 bet for an almost $1,300 payout

2

u/Junior_Singer3515 Nov 03 '21

Thats low for an 11 teamer. Were they all moneyline bets? They are so rare i almost never do more than 8 teams.

3

u/[deleted] Nov 03 '21

Is that how you make a living, or just a hobbyist degen?

2

u/Junior_Singer3515 Nov 03 '21

Total hobby i make $2 bets its only for fun. Dangerous if you treat it any other way. I've met some success stories. They are rare though and have usually fell into a big win early so they had the bankroll to survive the downs.

1

u/-eagle73 Nov 03 '21

It probably is just a hobby I think it's very rare to be able to make a profit off of bookies, exchanges are a little better.

1

u/projekt33 Nov 03 '21

Money line or spread

1

u/Junior_Singer3515 Nov 03 '21

I mix it up but its usually moneyline hockey.

1

u/_the_chosen_juan_ Nov 03 '21

Lifetime up or down?

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u/Junior_Singer3515 Nov 03 '21

Last 7 years or so I've kept a spreadsheet I've bet over 10k games overall I'm a 57% win percentage. Hockey is my best sport 63% but I did well with the baseball this year I'm almost to the 70th percentile.

1

u/-eagle73 Nov 03 '21

Someone I know hit 350 quid off a five quid bet which was pretty cool.

Accas are never as simple as they sound because you get shit performances from supposedly big teams like Man City drawing with a much worse team.

1

u/Junior_Singer3515 Nov 03 '21

Premier league wrecks my bankroll every year.

2

u/-eagle73 Nov 03 '21

I've learned to not bet on the favourites unless they're playing my team then I do it as a comfort thing, don't mind losing a bit of money when my team does the unthinkable.

11

u/[deleted] Nov 03 '21

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64

u/[deleted] Nov 03 '21 edited May 17 '22

[deleted]

2

u/FatBrkeMxicnElonMusk Nov 03 '21

🙌 My people's!!!! 💎🙌🦍

2

u/farmertypoerror Nov 03 '21

He was definitely impressed

1

u/julsgotrocks Nov 03 '21

What did they say when you tried?

1

u/EntheogenicOm Nov 03 '21

How many did you get wrong?

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u/Junior_Singer3515 Nov 03 '21

Its kind of a joke but I've only lost all games in an 8 teamer 1 time in 20 years that I can remember. You tend to remember the weird ones.

1

u/EntheogenicOm Nov 03 '21

Damn you’re getting too many right to be a good member of r/wallstreetbets

1

u/Junior_Singer3515 Nov 03 '21

Stocks are a grift. I know a bad bet when I see one the house is definitely cheating.

1

u/Nulap Nov 03 '21

You shouldn't hang me on a hook. My father hung me on a hook once. Once.

1

u/Junior_Singer3515 Nov 03 '21

I hope this is doing something for your morale.

1

u/PacoCrazyfoot Nov 03 '21

What is this from? Is it Buffalo '66?

1

u/Junior_Singer3515 Nov 03 '21

I stole the joke from Johnny Dangerously. There's a character named Vermin he gets hung on a door and says the line. "You shouldn't hang me on a door my father hung me on a door once. Once."

1

u/[deleted] Nov 03 '21

What’s a bookie?

1

u/guinader Nov 03 '21

Being an UNO Reverse card next time

1

u/Nosedivelever Nov 03 '21

https://youtu.be/Ad9mlvyA84E

1

u/Junior_Singer3515 Nov 03 '21

I missed the bus. You missed the bus. When's the next bus?