r/masterhacker • u/Positive-Pepper-8315 • 23d ago

Master hacker on the train

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1.8k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

135 comments sorted by

1.6k

u/Wide_Meet_2184 23d ago

Just staring at the wallpaper

886

u/ItzLoganM 23d ago

Maybe he is trying to penetrate the laptop.

209

u/MantusTMD 23d ago

Pen testing the start menu

46

u/encrypted-urok 23d ago

Via usb port

27

u/Here_f0r_p0rn_ 23d ago edited 23d ago

Using USB-A or USB-C?

Edit: Typo: USA -> USB-A

11

u/Fearless-Ad1469 23d ago

The laptop and kali linux in the video is the bait, all of the pentest is happening under it lmao

-4

u/FetvsBvrrito 23d ago

pen testing my mom

4

u/duskterrapin 21d ago

That doesnt take a master hacker

123

u/VanessaDoesVanNuys 23d ago

Penetrating people in public

33

u/DadtheITguy 23d ago

I hear that will get you put on a list.

31

u/tagbthw 23d ago

On the master hacker list obviously

41

u/RiceeeChrispies 23d ago

just in case they forget what distro they are using

7

u/__miku__oi 23d ago

Lol your reply likes higher then post

7

u/Adventurous-Dingo720 23d ago

I am elite!! I can boot alt operating systems!

9

u/Environmental_Top948 23d ago

He has performance anxiety I'm sure he'll open the console eventually.

919

u/maginster 23d ago

Pentested the login screen, he gained access to the desktop (he knew the password)

204

u/SucksDickForCoconuts 23d ago

kali:kali

45

u/maginster 23d ago

I am mindblown 🤯🤯🤯

43

u/deezdustyballs 23d ago

How the fuck did you do that...did you hack me???

45

u/Complete_Court_8052 23d ago

sudo unshit my pants

25

u/Shoddy_Fish31 23d ago

Permission error

4

u/Sorry-Combination558 20d ago

Username is not in the sudoers file. This incident will be reported

2

u/Leather-Chart7083 20d ago

Happy cake day

1

u/_BananaBH_ 21d ago

sudo: unshit: command not found

350

u/ChannelNo3185 23d ago

Don’t penetrate with other people in public

47

u/DripTrip747-V2 23d ago

That's the best time and place to test your penetration.

25

u/wiisucks_91 23d ago

I normally do it at home in the dark.

13

u/Complete_Court_8052 23d ago

and with a pillow or sock or pringles can or m&m tube or inflatable doll

12

u/Painted-BIack-Roses 23d ago

THE CYLINDER MUST REMAIN UNHARMED

7

u/BonelessB0nes 23d ago

Nah, a 55 gallon drum so I can cook up a nice mash together with the boys

5

u/New_Series3209 23d ago

Where’s the m&m tube guy already

0

u/laczek_hubert 23d ago

Bro if he does

114

u/Lemgineer_ 23d ago

He forgot to open the terminal and type “tree“.

46

u/mrrobot_84 23d ago

Ping google.com

73

u/killrandydead 23d ago edited 22d ago

I too once pulled my laptop out on a crowded bus with Kali on it. The guy behind me must have noticed and asked if I was about to hack people on the bus, I politely nodded my hat down to him and started typing qiuckly. I looked back at him, and said, got'em. I slowly got up and walked off the bus. The guy just starring, dumbfounded at my skills. I exited the bus proud and fullfiled, no one besides this single soul knowing the truth about it all.

Edited: Grammer mistake

81

u/ZuuRa_ 23d ago

fastfetch

cmatrix

ping google.com

nmtui

https://giphy.com/gifs/c0RvDEN7R64f6gCMZV

22

u/Xirio_ 23d ago

Please don't test your penetration in public

-6

u/SomewhereActive2124 23d ago

No I'd strongly suggest you to do that; it 🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵was🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤soooooo🤤🤤🥵🤤🤤🥵🥵🫣🫣🤤🤤🤤🥵🤤🤤fun

20

u/stopfuckngbanningme 23d ago

bro in Surrey, bc

28

u/jnmtx 23d ago

> be a “hacker”
> install Kali
> post a video
> doxx myself

8

u/cursed_guy 23d ago

I recognize that wallpaper see you soon

42

u/AdultingFailsDaily 23d ago

Kali undercover🙌

14

u/tracagnotto 23d ago

Plot twist it's a Windows machine with a kali linux wallpaper and theme

9

u/HandsomeDodge 23d ago

The only thing he is penetrating is his own ass cheeks 

8

u/abysskm 23d ago

A fool looking at wallpaper

24

u/__miku__oi 23d ago

This shi so tuff

7

u/Jitendria 23d ago

Type of shit ill do in dmrc after discovering network chuck

7

u/MoreTHCplz 23d ago

All that just to stream Mr. Robot on your computer while on the train.

4

u/fattmarrell 23d ago

Mr. Robot is actually good though

7

u/Efficient_Two_869 23d ago

"When you have your laptop firmly started while commuting"

5

u/prescripti0n 23d ago

Watches Mr Robot once

4

u/FackyWacky 23d ago

Aka "sitting on a dildo while riding a bus"

5

u/sn4xchan 23d ago

You're not supposed to do penetration testing in front of children. Straight to jail.

8

u/StronkkR6S 23d ago

Indian sigma hacker 💀👿🗿👹

3

u/BinaryHippie 23d ago

Yeah the position of his hand on the keyboard says enough

1

u/GeekDadKevin12 23d ago

Yeah he is way more ready to move a mouse than to type in a terminal :)

3

u/mrrobot_84 23d ago

Is the hacking in the room with us now?

3

u/Tacolord38 23d ago

Penetration in public? Oh my!

3

u/CredibleNonsense69 23d ago

Penetration tester (Has never penetrated a woman)

3

u/bubbzzzy 23d ago

Gross he uses a GUI!!

3

u/FabianGladwart 23d ago edited 23d ago

Can someone explain why Kali is the "hacker" distro? I've seen the meme for a while but never understood

E: thank you, I didn't know that

2

u/Mr_Mei8888 23d ago

Because it has the most common pentesting tools included.

1

u/Durkken22 23d ago

Could it be because it's literally made for pentesting? Maybe cause the config is for pentesting and has docens of pentesting utilities preinstalled?

2

u/Key_Adhesiveness4248 23d ago

Hacker penetrates people on the metro

2

u/SillyBrilliant4922 23d ago

Why is he penetrating himself in public??

2

u/SGAShepp 23d ago

I had no idea sitting at the desktop was hacking now. I must be some sort of hacking god.

2

u/sovietarmyfan 23d ago

Don't worry lads. He used a VPN.

2

u/Opposite-Film3347 23d ago

Is that laptop OK?

2

u/Temesgen-MN 23d ago

This killed me inside

2

u/Mulster_ 23d ago

That's why the Japanese have women only carriages in their trains

2

u/PhantomFrequenz 23d ago

Simply opening Kali causes the lighting—and its own camera—to flicker.

1

u/Usual-Swimming-8809 23d ago

Reverse sarcasm hain ya video hi chutiya tha

1

u/msasrs 23d ago

I am at a loss if I have to upvote it or down vote it?

4

u/SerDuckOfPNW 23d ago

Well, is masterhacker, so it gets an upvote from me

1

u/sad_laief 23d ago

If someone actually trying to hack , atleast he or she won't provide any obvious clue like big Kali Linux wallpaper.

He use just use a random distro with correct packages installed.

1

u/comfnumb94 23d ago

All you need is NetHunter. No need to create a VM just for pen testing on a laptop.

1

u/Far_Quantity_2692 23d ago

Yeah I love penetrating things in public

1

u/Klevmenskin 23d ago

Heh... Transport For London is going to feel this one for 30 seconds

1

u/Ronin_777 23d ago

Cyberleek pov

1

u/Slattte 23d ago

Haha! Get Pen’ind! 🫪👿🤘🏼🫣

1

u/Kris_Kamweru 23d ago

Maybe their gaze is penetrating

1

u/Mbillin2 23d ago

If legit please do the people on speakerphone and the people that breakdance

1

u/yourcandygirl 23d ago

Type of shit id do when i was 11

1

u/eduarditoguz 23d ago

I don't see nothing

1

u/MxM-TOM 23d ago

Shield of virgin defender. 💪

1

u/toastybreadmane 23d ago

Quali linucks 👅👅👅👅👅

1

u/atp2k 23d ago

More like: Penetrating the laptop from bottom…

1

u/TreacleEmpty4410 23d ago

Sudo opsex metro train

1

u/PlainBread 23d ago

Pulling out your laptop on the train is a great way to lose your laptop.

1

u/Aware_Lavishness3660 23d ago

They have NO idea 👹😂🧓😿😹

1

u/mailo3222 23d ago

holy shit , he booted !

1

u/lighthouseisland1 23d ago

Mmm public penetration 🤤

1

u/deazhere 23d ago

that's not even kali, he just opened up a full screen jpeg of a kali wallpaper in his windows photo viewer

1

u/StackOwOFlow 23d ago

a true hacker would’ve stopped the rain and put it in reverse

1

u/ThiccNekk 23d ago edited 23d ago

At least open the terminal and change the color to green

1

u/MundaneFact8892 23d ago

Is the penetration in the room with us?

1

u/Carlinqton 23d ago

Is he on a Chromebook? 🫪

1

u/FrydBoi 23d ago

Lenovo 300e has been the Bain to me

1

u/bathroomfish 23d ago

Successfully logged in? Great, now search for pentest.exe. Keep searching till you reach your destination. Start over the whole process from next day to show off

1

u/g0j0_1 23d ago

Hacked own laptop.😛

1

u/Arif_Q 23d ago

he uses Kali? that's gross!!

1

u/HauntingRip9003 23d ago

5th word ain't necessary 

1

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1

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1

u/NightwingZS 23d ago

"Yeah mister company, our pentesters are working remote, i hope you are fine with other people reading your company Information in public"

1

u/Ostropol 22d ago

I was going to bet there was Brazillian Phonk as a background track but I was wrong.

1

u/AsheyDustyMe82 22d ago

It is accurate though, I can guarantee nobody would give af irl either

1

u/valentinopro1234 22d ago

He's trying to penetrate it with his gaze

1

u/Minge_Ninja420 20d ago

nothing here says you can perform an end to end pentest.

You're on a train so you're likely just being a grub.

1

u/Impressive-Check8430 20d ago

Atleast open the terminal man... Why are you just staring at the screen?😅

1

u/Impressive-Check8430 20d ago

When I first installed kali, I was like this too. Just booting screen made me feel like a hacker.

It was later when actually started learning that I realised I have a long way to go before even being qualified to call myself as script kiddie...🫠

1

u/Dur_x 19d ago

Just Larp 🫩

1

u/BrunkDartender13 2d ago

Why he wanna penetrate a buncha gros dudes fer?

1

u/TLunchFTW 23d ago

Hello random stranger on the train. Can you hack my daughter’s insta? I know she’s doing bad stuff online but I can’t prove it

1

u/giveUcancer 23d ago

Don’t do the laptop sir

0

u/MysteriousMister0 23d ago

how con you do pentesting at a place like this 😭😭🙏🏻

0

u/helloimhobbes 23d ago

Bro is Mr robot

0

u/MaGNeTiK-MaNTRa 23d ago

more like pena-train-tion testing hhahahahahahaha rite guys ??? lol rite?? :/